Chapter Six

‘Scartissue’

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After the surprise began to slowly fade away and the pain of her injury reached her body Angela finally let the sigh of relief escape her lips and allow herself to fall into Ben's arms that quickly brought her against his chest - to safety. With closed eyes Angela clang onto him, hoping that he was really there and that he wouldn’t be just a dream. She didn’t dare to open her eyes again to witness the horror.

His hand was pressed to her back and its hold calmed her keeping the tears and panic away. She had no idea why he was here or did she care now that he'd arrived like the angel she'd called out to for so many years to save her from danger. She blinked the hot falling tears from her eyes searching for the man who'd attacked her. His body lay a bit further away and she found the other three dead also. They were all dead.

Ben made some distance between them to take a look at her. He put his hand gently on her cheek and whispered with his hoarse voice: “Look what they did to you.” Ben moved her hair behind her ears caressing her cheeks.

Angela still looked frightened and drained. Ben was about to lift her up when she sighed painfully and looked at him with her blue teary eyes. “My shoulder… it’s dislocated.”

Ben laid his hand over it and pushed it towards her placing all the bones to their right places. She didn’t make a sound, but felt could feel her body cramping against him. “Come on. We need to go now.” Ben said while helping her to get up on her feet.

Her hand searched for the knife which she hid somewhere in her jacket after finding it from the ground. Its blade was covered in blood.

Again they faced each other as Angela stretched herself to her full length. Ben pressed her against him. “Shhh… You’ll be fine.” He encouraged her and took a look at her feet then. She seemed unable to keep walking without help. “Can you walk?” He asked since he had already learned not to approach her without permission. The last thing Ben was aiming at would be upsetting her again.

“I’ll be fine.” Her voice seemed certain for once and he trusted her evaluation wiping his own bloody hand to his jacket. That was when Angela turned her head and saw the wound. His hand was bleeding. “Did I cut you?” Her voice was ominous, alert and frightened.

Ben just nodded with a boyish smile on his face: “Yeah, but don’t worry about it.” Angela seemed to calm a bit after his assuring. No more of that disturbing look of hers.

“Help me.” She pleaded with her hands reaching out to him and he nodded before taking a part of her weight on him. She gave her trust to him and laid her body against him for him to carry. Right now Angela just felt exhausted and tired. It was way over midnight and she needed sleep.

The further they got the more she began to regain her uncertainty. She’d have to flee the city as soon as possible. She couldn’t risk any further exposure and she couldn’t have Ben dragging along. There was simply no knowing what they’d do next. Slowly she began putting more trust to her own feet. She hated pity and she couldn’t stand thinking that Ben almost carrying her would make her weak. She wanted to be strong, hard, but she wasn’t – not really.

Ben could sense her sudden urge to walk without his aide and he stopped. “You want to walk on your own now?” He asked sweetly making Angela move away. There was no doubt that he had saved her, but she was sure how to handle it. If she'd be too nice he might draw the wrong conclusions. “I’m not crimp.” She snapped and began walking on her own. Ben reached her with a few steps.

“Hey. No need to get angry here. I’ll walk you. They might return.” Fear was shining in her eyes before she hardened herself and looked at him with a cold smile-like look. “Just don’t get any ideas.” She said and walked on swallowing the hurt her bitter words caused in her throat.

Angela was really glad that Ben hadn’t asked her anything about what had just happened. She wasn’t ready to tell him or anyone for the matter. She wasn’t even sure if there were words to explain. How do you tell someone… no words to explain…?

They reached the shabby hotel again and walked the same stairs up that they'd walked a few hours ago. In her mind Angela went through all possible explanations for the situation, but she couldn't think of any so she decided to leave the situation as it was. He'd be gone soon anyway.

Still... She took a careful look from her eye corner. He'd come back in the middle of the night rescuing her and getting himself hurt in the process. Something inside her ached, but it wasn't the wounds - it was him.

He'd felt so right in that car trunk. Maybe that's why...

They stopped at the door. Angela cleared her mind of all suspicion: She couldn't have him around, it'd be wrong. She reached to her pocket picking up the key to the door while he waited calmly by her side.

Angela's hands had begun shaking again and that's why she couldn't get the key to the lock with her first try. She forced her hands to work her will, but it wasn’t really working. She nearly dropped the key before it found its way to the lock. With a swift move the door was open. Turned to take a long last look at him Angela prepared to speak the words of goodbye.

“Bye...” Her voice was weak as if she didn’t truly wish to speak those words. That all he needed: A sign of doubt.  

“Thanks for the invitation. Yes, I would like to come in.” Ben smiled going right by her and entering the room. “Hey! Get out!” she yelled running after him to stop him from entering her room, her life and her heart.

“Nice room. Looks just like you.” Ben searched the room for any clues, anything that would reveal Angela's secrets. Just like in his room there was no trace of settling. There was a brown back bag near the bed. Ben was thinking that it contained all that she had in her possession.

Angela didn't want him to witness her poor attempts of fixing the damage done in that alley he'd rescued her from so she closed her hand around his shoulder almost gently pleading for him to go with her words: “You need to go.” She was nearly begging there, but Ben just ignored her and sat on the bed.

“I need loving care here.” he claimed and showed her his bleeding hand. She took one guilty look at it and looked away.

“Not my problem.” She mumbled knowing that it was definitely her problem.

“You just nearly stabbed me with your ‘best friend’ here.” Ben was getting serious. He wanted to understand, but she wouldn’t let him.

Angela had crossed her arms over her chest as a sign of her inflexibility in the matter. She looked wild, a worthy opponent to him if it weren't for the little fact that she was a human and he was a transgenic and Ben felt nothing but pity towards the human race.

“There’s a hospital.” Angela said waking Ben from his thoughts. So she was human, it most certainly didn't stop him from wanting her. Even in that church he'd known what she was and still played with the thought that she bared such a close resemblance to the divine creature he'd given his life to.

Ben shuddered at her words. “Can’t go there and neither can you from what I saw back there.” he announced. Men attacking her: She'd known those men and it had been no accident that they'd been beating her up in that alley. So what was her dark secret, other than the fact that she could quite obviously steal a car without any moral or technical problem?

“You saw nothing!” Angela shouted rushing to deny everything he might say. She felt threatened by him and it didn't help that he'd seen and probably heard too much of her conversation with her attacker.

“Okay cutie. There are these guys who want to get you. You want me to hand you over?” Ben's face didn't shiver when he snapped his fingers in the air in front of her face. He didn’t the way his words came out as blackmail. She didn’t like it either from what he saw.  

Pressing her teeth together she just put on a sour mask: “Who asked you to be my guardian angel?”

“I could call them.” He hinted as he and walked closer to her every part in his body suddenly engulfed in the strange spark between them.

Angela hit back knowingly and denying: “You don’t have their number.”

“You get the point.” he said stopping in front of her. He looked down to her now sensing the same kind of tension that had been in the air before that forbidden kiss in the trunk of a stolen car. It’d be so easy to just force her into his embrace and kiss away every objection she might have. It’d be so easy to carry over the bed and…

“Thank you.” Her honest words came out of the blue and nearly froze Ben completely. Why was she stopping the wicked words and bringing in an honest comment for once? He was stupefied with her words. Ben could simply stare down to her in wonder. "What?” he muttered before Angela lifted her hand and pointed at the door repeating her words more slowly this time: “Thank you. Now there’s the door, help yourself out.”

Uncertain about the meaning of this entire show Ben returned to the stiff defending mode. "I don’t get you.” he said and the tension vanished along with his words.

The emotionless mask on her pretty angelic face hadn't slipped even once during the short conversation. “Too bad. You’re not involved.” she stated.

Ben was startled by the sudden pain he felt in his hand and as he looked down, he could see how blood had run down his fingers and on the floor. He took his wounded hand to his chest cradling it with his healthy one. Angela had also noticed the hand's condition and if he wasn't mistaken it was guilt that he saw in her expression.  

“Just tie my hand and I’ll be off.” he said giving his hand to her. Her dexterous fingers closed around the injured hand almost cautiously.

“Will you?” Her careful question woke him up. Would he?

Ben didn’t have the time to think before she threw her jacket on the bed and closed the door. “I’ll get you some band aid.” She said and let go of the injured hand before she vanished into the bathroom. Ben turned to take look at the back bag lying next to him. It seemed light.

Angela returned quickly and dragged him into the bathroom with her before he could think of an objection. She placed his hand over the sink and held it there. Then a bottle of vodka appeared on her hand and she opened it with her teeth. First Ben thought she was going to take a long sip, but instead she gave Ben a look and poured the alcohol on his wound.

The transgenic didn’t even move. He was trained not to show his weakness or pain. Still he felt something in his hand. He just wasn’t sure if it was the wound or her touch.

She wrapped a towel around his hand after washing the alcohol away with water. Then she took the band aid in her hand gazing at the wound with her amazing eyes. Ben could somehow sense that this wasn’t the first time she was doing this.

Angela threw the towel away and began to bind his wound with band aid. The binding was tight and good. Ben found himself surprised, positively. A girl who could use a knife, but also take care of the damage she’d done with it. That was an unseen sight.

She finished binding the wound and let go of his hand. Then she walked back into the bedroom and seemed to forget his entire existence. Ben tried out his hand and found it quite capable of moving. Still not sure what had just happened Ben found his way back into the bedroom. He stopped at the doorway to take another look at her as he found peace in looking at Angela.

Angela was trying to get her white collar shirt off, but her hand was still in a bad condition and she couldn’t bend it much. She'd gotten the shirt halfway down, when he finally saw them: Her back was filled with bad looking bruises and old wounds. There was scar tissue that he could date years back for all of it couldn't possibly be new.

Just what the hell was going on?

“Are you going to keep on watching or turn so I can change my clothes?” She asked with an iron voice sounding tired and not pleased with his presence. Ben thought it wise to turn his back so she could put on a clean shirt.

Once Angela was done she turned to face him and sighed before asking him: “Is your hand ok?” Her voice had a tender tone in it that actually surprised him. Ben turned around and nodded hiding the fact that seeing her bruises had been shocking.

After making sure he was now fully patched she turned into her ‘normal self’ and all of that kindness seemed to disappear. “Time’s up.” She whispered harshly before she got up and kicked her shoes off her feet with two aggressive kicks sending them flying to the other end of the room. The shirt was still hardly on her. Just a few buttons were holding it still and it revealed more than Ben would’ve liked. He was having trouble not to stare. Angela didn’t seem to mind.

“What?” he asked not quite understanding the question she’d performed. Her entrancing walk was keeping him occupied as she came to him. “Time’s up. Leave.” She repeated wishing that he wouldn’t start up a fight or anything. Instead Ben moved even closer to her. “It doesn’t have to.” His hoarse voice sounded so tempting.

Angela found herself tempted to forget about everything and let him close her in his embrace, but her sense kept on telling her how she had to stay strong and how she couldn’t slip. Slipping caused trouble... and pain. It'd already led him this far...

He was now right in front of her. She was smaller, so much smaller than he was. Her head barely reached his chin when she stood straight. That pair of amazingly blue eyes gave their look to him ready to rebel against every word he’d say. Her red lips were ready to spill their poison upon him, but also to tell the truth if needed. Ben looked down again and saw the marks of beating under her collarbone. The open shirt revealed bruises.

“Leave now.” Angela’s voice was demanding. Ben ignored her again. “It doesn’t have to end.” He was moving his head closer to hers. Was one kiss too much to ask?

“Go now.” Her answer was cold and she sounded rude, but apparently she just wanted him out. Still her voice lacked the power that came with true desire. Shocked by her own powerlessness Angela pulled away and walked to the door opening it. She had hardened herself and wasn’t going to listen to him. She'd done that mistake once already.

One kiss was apparently something he’d never get.

Ben stayed still and continued to talk with whispers. “Where did you get the bruises Angela?” His question seemed to wake her up. She turned to give him a deadly look before answering: “In case you didn’t notice I was just in a fight.”

“They’re older. That scar tissue dates years back. Who were those men? What did they want from you?” bombed her with unwanted questions she'd heard too many times. All she wanted was him to stop, so she denied it all: “You’re paranoid. I’m just fine.”

Ben couldn't understand why she acted like nothing had happened. She was hurt, so many scars in her body. He could help her, keep her safe. “I just want to protect you. That’s all.”

“I don’t need your protection.” she stated.

“What about my affection? Do you deny it too? Is that why you jump when I touch you?” Angela wanted to turn her head and say to him all the things that troubled her, but she couldn't.

“Well I don’t like you.” her bitter voice sounded unbelievable. He knew she was lying: “Lies, my angel. I’ve felt it. You want it as badly as I do.” he laughed eyeing her in a way she didn't like - again.

“Out!” she shouted causing more pain to her throat. Ben could see that he was striking a nerve here. Angela was having trouble in holding herself together. He just didn’t know how to close in on the matter.

“I’m not leaving. Not after what happened. You may not be safe.” His words just made her slam the door closed and walk over to him looking mad.

“I’ve changed my mind.” She said cynically showing a sour face. “You’re going out the window.” She added and tried to kick him, but the transgenic’s abilities made it able for him to catch her leg and knock her down instead.

“You’re in danger and you’re clearly not capable of defending yourself.” He stepped over her and straddled on her waist. Ben held her down by pushing her shoulder. Angela tried to struggle but he was more than strong. “Didn’t ask you to baby sit me.” She groaned between her teeth, but quit her struggling hoping that he would let her go if she stayed still.

After he'd held her awhile, something in her was awoken again. Angela calmed her entire body just so that he wouldn’t see how she was panicking. Angela cursed her own weakness, but just his closeness was beginning to distress him. She was hearing the words again… even her own scream.

“Stop it! Stop it!” a teary voice yelled within her head. Tears were forming in her eyes.

Ben was about to say something when he saw those shining tears fall down her cheeks. God, he didn’t want to make her cry! He wanted to make her smile and laugh and he wanted her to kiss him! Ben got up and off her. With quick moves he lifted her up and was about to apologize when she suddenly slapped his face.

Ben took a step backwards and put his hand on his cheek not believing that she had actually slapped her. Didn’t see that one coming.

“Go away! My problems do not concern you.” She gasped between her teeth. Her hair had fallen on her face and tears stopped falling. A memory hit Ben.

“I won’t leave.” He whispered softly.

“Why?” She asked with a broken voice as if she was about to begin to cry at any minute. Ben came closer and took her head between his hands. His face pressed against her hair he said: “Because I promised you.” They shared a look before Ben turned away to walk over to an armchair. He took his jacket off slowly without hurry.

“Only for tonight.” Was her reply. “I’ll sleep here.” Ben answered and sat on that armchair. He didn’t know why he was doing this, but he knew that he wanted to be close to her. To make sure nothing happened to her.

Ben pressed his head against the soft chair, closing his eyes, but still sensing as she walked to him after a while and placed a blanket over him.

-

It took him awhile to regain consciousness. It took him a few seconds to make his senses work his will.

He could hear restless breathing through the air. Angela. She was whispering, but clearly sounding terrified. The word repeated was “no”.

Ben’s eyes blinked open and he searched through the room with his night vision. Angela’s movement was uncontrolled. She was still asleep.

Ben rose without sound and dropped the blanket on the floor. She was starting to speak louder. “No. I beg. Not again.” She was afraid, he could tell. Ben moved to her and found Angela rolling from side to side nervously.

A nightmare? Her face was so sweaty that her hair was glued on her face. Ben wanted to help, but he wasn’t sure if he should. Finally he encouraged himself and put his hand on her shoulder trying to shake her awake.

“Angela?” he asked and felt her body tremble under his hand.

Then suddenly something gave a quick shine in the dark. Only Ben's transgenic senses made him see the danger in time as the hand holding a knife flew through the air. His quick reflexes made him able to stop the hand it before the knife hit him and Angela woke up as Ben's grip crushed her wrist tightly.

Ben couldn’t get his eyes off the knife. She slept next to that thing!

Angela turned her head facing him and with frightened eyes she pulled her hand away from him. It had clearly been a reflect. She had attacked the first person to touch her during her sleep. “Ben?” She seemed shocked and quickly she put the knife away from her hands.

Guilt was all over her face. Again she was beginning to make Ben want to shake her real hard. Those lost eyes could be so innocent and fragile, but also so denying. They shared a long look. Ben was worried, she was fighting her weakness.

“Are you ok?” Ben asked and squatted before her.

“It was just a nightmare.” She said and pressed her head against her hands.

Ben wasn't too convinced: “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You’d better sit down.” There was hesitation before she could speak that sentence. Trust: Somehow that’d always been the issue at hand.

He continued looking at her admiringly from his place and didn’t move even though she had let go off her anger. She was shaking slightly and it was quite obvious that she still hadn’t been able to relax. He took her hand in his and smiled to ease her pain. “I’d crawl into bed with you, but I’m thinking you’d just slap my face.”

“You’re afraid…?” she breathed amazed and doubting.

“Coming out of the mouth of a girl who sleeps with a knife? Nope.” he shook his head.

“I just might cut off something very important to you.” Now was her time to doubt him as she arched her brows and showed her confidence.

“I doubt that. Why the knife? You afraid of the dark?” It was like speaking to a child and trying to explain that there were no monsters lurking under her bed. She seemed quite sure there were. “Anything could come out.”  

“I did.”

“Even you scare me Ben.” Angela’s last comment made Ben stop. She wasn’t joking. Angela’s eye looked sad and made Ben want to kiss them. He moved a bit closer and dared himself to say the words: “Can I come?”

Angela didn’t bother to answer, but she just found a comfortable position and placed her head against the pillow. Ben walked to the other side of the bed and softly came next to her.

Ben wasn’t going to approach, he thought she needed some space, but her voice was sad as she asked him for one favour: “Just hold me.”

He turned over his side and took her in his arms, pressing his head against her hair. This time Angela pull away, shake or panic. She pressed herself deeper into his arms, closer to him.

She didn’t reject him and he felt joy. It felt right, like they had done it in a thousand different lives. It didn’t take him long to fall asleep there next to her, but Angela couldn’t put herself to sleep as the black and white motion picture of her life went on in her head like it had been going on every night for four years.

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