| The Difference Between Hosting A Dinner Party And Drunken Mingling |
| DO --Have an assortment of hors d'oeuvres waiting for your guests --Have a fun and appropriate after-dinner game, such as pictionary and charades --Play a mixture of dance music and "chat" music. Urge your guests to alternate their chatter with cutting loose on the dance floor --Encourage talk at the dinner table. If all falls quiet, bring up a non-too-controversial current event, social matter, or mutual friend or acquaintance to continue the conversation smoothly. --Toast your friends and loved ones by pointing out their great qualities or sharing a humorous anecdote. |
| DON'T --Shove the telephone book at your first arrivee and say "I burnt the bleedin' food. Order yourself a pizza." --Say (whilst shoving the directory at Larry) "I'm going out to play naked lawn darts with Bono. Call me when the pizza's here." --Put on Metallica and start a mosh pit (particularly if there happens to be small children around and/or you are holding this get-together in your own home). --Start off dinner with "Someone broke the toliet. If you have to go, see me for "The Bucket". --Say "Bono, mate, you're like my own brother. And if I didn't love you or Morleigh so dearly I would have slept with Ali years ago." |
| This is a DEFINITE sign that you are way beyond drunk. Leave the dinner table immediately and lock yourself in a coat closet for a minimum of 25 to 30 minutes. Everyone'll get bored by this time and go home. Then it's a matter of willpower after that. How long can you go without picking up the phone or returning calls??? |
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