Our life should not be based on fairy tales or bedtime stories that are read to us in our childhood. Children are very open and accepting of anything adults tell them is the truth. As we grow older, the visions of castles in the mist, and brave knights who slay dragons are dimmed. The long ago stories of a fair maiden waiting for a bold man to rescue her are put away in the back of our minds. They are still there, but not thought of often, because we realize that real life does not imitate fiction. Every once in a while, we might take those tucked away dreams, dust them off, and day dream of what could be....If we lived in a fairy tale.
....In a land nearby, there lives a middle aged woman who is called Lady Lonely-Heart of the Plus-sizes. She has been cursed with wide hips, a man-sized appetite for food, and an ample bosom. There has also been a lock placed upon her heart that only her true love can open, as he has the one key. She is loved by her family and friends, has a good job, a roof over her head, reliable transportation, fashionable clothing, a strong faith in God, and an empty space in her heart.
She tries to fill her days with work and hobbies, but she knows that something is missing in her life. Deep down Lonely-Heart believes that she has missed her calling. The tug on her heart to be a wife and mother lingers in the back of her mind, and aches in her soul.
To try to find other things to occupy her mind, she buys a computer, taps into The Net, and begins her search. She has a picture in her mind of who she's dreamt about all these lonely years, and she hopes that he'll find her. She has heard great tales of others who have found their mates by creating a personals ad. They belong to a group known as the Paired-ones. So she begins. Trying to find the words that will scorch the heart of that man she longs for, takes time. Lonely-Heart becomes a Mate-Seeker and tries several of the online sites that have been recommended by these Paired-ones. She plans a few Tests for her mate that will have to be passed before she pursues contact with him. Whoa, what's this? She finds out that there are creeps aplenty in the supposedly "safe" online sites. Where did these people come from? And, why are they asking for nekkid photos????? And what IS cybering????? The mental picture of the little Trolls from those bedtime stories jumps to her mind and makes her shudder. Oh, the thought of these Trolls with their cold, dark eyes, and twisted mouths, drooling over the various pictures of women, trying to pick their next victim. Sheesh!!
Nevertheless, she ignores these perverts and she keeps her mind on her mission...to find her Dream Love. Sorting through the MASSES of men that have one thing on their minds (or some of them, maybe more than one, and none of them publishable); she tries to filter through the jargon of online dating sites. Why are all of these great looking and great sounding (according to their description) men still unattached? Do they have warts...wicked mothers that brew nasty things in their cauldrons...unsightly hair on their backs...a tendency to morph into werewolves during a full moon? She asks herself as she surfs the profiles. What am I doing, she thinks? These men are lonely in search of lasting love, just as I am. They can�t all be Trolls. They should not be shunned because of physical deformities, or the families they are born in to. After all, they could be thinking the same things about you. So on she plods...day after day, night after night, in search of her true love.
After months of fending off Trolls, Lonely-Heart doesn't find him and begins to loose hope of ever reaching that "one". Along the way, she does locate a couple of good men who become Chat-Buddies. One of them, Leonardo the Mechanical, lives close by her, but is not interested in a romance with her, so they settle into a random pattern of discussing day to day happenings. Another of them, Bigdan of the Flatland, lives, oh say, eight states away... the distance is too much for dating, so they also become Chat-Buddies. Both of these men help her to see that there ARE good men online who are searching for the same thing she is...only thing is, neither one of them want her, and neither one is what she is looking for. They are all content to be friends. Both of these men have found their sweethearts. They talk to her about them, and she listens. Funny how after all this time, she is back in the same place she was in during her school days. Lonely-Heart is once more the good friend who gives girlfriend advice to men who have absolutely no desire for her. It seems to be her lot in life at this point. She does see the irony in the situation, but sees no way to change things.....