| First Mother She might have been a mother, But she was just a girl. It's certain no one told her That this child would be her world. Maybe she saw her baby's face, But only by mistake Or perhaps someone gave her the chance A memory to make. They said, "You have to do what's best, You have to do what's right." They didn't tell her how she'd feel, In the middle of the night. She didn't know she'd start awake, Hearing that baby cry. Even through it isn't there, She'll love it till she dies.... They took away her baby And they took away her heart. They said, "this way you can forget, You can make a fresh start." They didn't tell her that her child Already knew her voice. They didn't dare to let her know That she still had a choice. She might have been a mother But she was just a girl. It's certain no one told her That this child would be her world. written by: Charlotte C. Haus 1999 |
| The Rose that Grew in My Heart A Rose was planted, long ago, On a warm and sunny day. But the rose was taken from its place, And planted far way. And so I did not tend the rose, With Mother's daily toil, Instead I made a fertile place, With my heart's blood as soil. And though the rose grew somewhere else, The years we were apart, I kept that rose still close to me, To grow within my heart. So, though I didn't wipe yours tears, Or see your fist steps start, Please know my love still lived and grew, In the garden of my heart. You grew in loveliness and grace, As a rose grows, and for my part, I knew the rose you would become, That rose grew in my heart . Unknown Author. If you know who wrote this please contact me so that I can give proper acknowledgment. |
| FAVORITE POETRY |
| A Daughter How do you talk to a daughter--the one you gave away? Do you act as if you're surprised as she? Do you pretend you weren't there at her birth? Do you lie, say she's like a close friend? Your've always know about her; you've never forgotten that she is you daughter. There's been enough lying and pretending and acting as if. So you broach the truth of your experience and endure the barren silences that follow fearing this will be the end. Hoping this will bring you closer to the woman who is your daughter. |
| New Memories If I watch you work on a bright Summer's Day Will it lessen the pain of never seeing you play? Can I now think of you as you are today My son; grown, and competent in his life and trade. And will it replace that image etched upon my soul; The one of my baby I left there so many years ago. If I touch your hair, and put my hands to your face Will the memory of being denied this Simple act of a Mother's love be erased? Is that something that will go away? Do you think it might disapper someday? How long will I have to hold you when we say goodbye. How long does it take exactly to quiet the terror I attempt to hide? I wish I knew the answer to these. Where are the experts now? The ones who told me you and I would be just fine, The same ones who said I would forget in time. I will never forget, and perhaps that is the way it should be. It is a part of your life, and it is a part of me. It was our beginning, our shared history. Perhaps to heal is not to forget but to celebrate each other now. The days and years ahead made more precious Because of those many years that did seperate us. There will no doubt be days when I will forget this thought, As the tears and anger fllood me once again. But I will think of you working on a bright Summer's Day And how watching you work did lessen the pain of never seeing you play. by Cathy Denny, reunited Firstmother |
| Insecurity Will I ever get over this insecurity? That feeling that you will soon be gone for no reason that there is to see creeps in while I am unaware and grips the very soul of me? It is not a natural way for a Mother to feel. Fearing her child will grow weary of the effort it must take to balance two Mothers in his life and still see his own needs clearly. I know it is guilt that drives this fear for what I so long ago had to do. I am also well aware that so many in your situation refuse to share any part of their real lives with the Mothers who seemed not to care, The Mothers who could not be there. It is this deep anger and bitterness that gives my heart such a scare. I have talked to many others who feel this same way. Some say it gets better while others must fight these feelings every day. It doesn't seem to matter, although it should, If our children reassure us of their intent to be a part of our life for good. Because you see, it is ourselves we must first forgive before we can accept the love our children are willing to give. This is not easy task for a Mother to do after being denied the natural right of taking care of you. But is is getting better, I can feel that too. I believe that someday it will all disappear; that awful fear of losing you. by Cathy Denny, reunited Firstmother |
 |
|
| Our Family Tree The family Tree Grows stately and tall. The branches, limbs, and twigs Gently swaying in the breeze year after year. A branch sprouts a limb That someone decrees Is out of place, And that twig is pruned-- Cut right off. That branch continues to grow, The only evidence Of its missing limb-- A scar where it was pruned So many years ago. That scar lasts a lifetime, Never healing completely, At times weeping-- Its sap seeping Out unnoticeably. The severed limbs Are gathered up And grafted unto other stock, To grow and reach their destiny Without the roots of their family tree. by Blance Thompson |
| My Child is Now a Man Who am I searching for? My child is now a man.. But my heart seeks out an infant, Please help me understand. I know the years have all passed by And his childhood is gone. Still my heart seeks out that infant, My life seeks out my son. That child is no longer there In his place now stands a man. Yet my heart seeks out the infant, Please help me understand. by Balnche Thompson |
| Firstmothers Never Forget!!! |