new york, new york

chapter 78

I didn't open my eyes right away. I wanted to enjoy of feeling that came over me thinking that I'm home. But then I started to listen. It didn't sound like home at all. It sounded more like� New York.
Slowly I opened my eyes. It was dark, window was a pale square on the wall. I looked around. There was all kind of machines around me. Oh my god, I was in a hospital.
I tried to turn, just to get up and find out what I was doing there. Some one moved in a room.
-Mom? I asked and was amazed how faint my voice was. It was like I haven't been talking in days. My mouth was dry.
-You're awake, someone said. It took me while to recognize the voice.
-Oliver? Is that you?
He came beside to bed and lighted a small lamp.
-Yeah, it's me. Good to see you.
-What happened? Why am I here? Why are you here? Is the baby�?
-Everything's fine now, he said seeing me panic over the baby. I touched my tummy and yes, he was still there. I sighed.
-You have to lie back down, Oliver continued. �You're in hospital. Something happened to you on your way to the airport. They used all those fancy phrases so I'm not sure what it was. But you'll both be okay if you just do as told.
I laid back down.
-Why are you here? I asked again.
-Remember when you had that bad cold and you had to go and see a doctor?
It was when I was still with Oliver.
-Yeah. And when they asked closest relative�
-You gave them my name and address. Just in case. That they wouldn't worry your parents by calling to them.
-My parents�
-Don't worry. Charlene called them and explained the situation.
-They don't speak English very well.
-I guess they did a conference call. Your sister and everything.
-Did she�? Do they know?
-Well, I had to tell mom. She was so worried. And we assumed you would have told to your parents.
-I haven't. I thought I would do that when I could go there. And now I'm here. Shit, Oliver. This wasn't supposed to happen.
-Lot of things probably wasn't. But they did. And here we are.
He sat on the bed and held my hand.
-You have to take care of you and your baby. That's what counts. Everything else is secondary, you know that.
Slowly I started to cry. I didn't want that but I couldn't help myself. Oliver just sat there and wiped few tears off.
-Do you know� When can I go home?
-You've got to sleep. Doctor will come first in the morning and explain it all.
-Oliver.
-What?
-Thanks for being here.
-There's nowhere I'd rather be. I love you. Not try to sleep.
He shut down the light. I listened vivid silence again and fell asleep.

Next morning facts came clear to me. I didn't understand much of doctor's explanations about my condition. All I cared was that I wasn't able to go home. And wouldn't be until baby was born.
-You have to take it easy. Stay in bed, not get exited. It's only three months. I know it feels like eternity, but it's only three months. It's to protect you and the baby. By the way, do you want to know which one it is? doctor asked in the end.
-You mean�?
-As if it's a boy or a girl. Do you want to know? It's hundred percent sure, 'cause we had to do amniocentesis.
-Yes, I do.
-Congratulations, Anna. You'll be having a boy. A healthy boy, if you just follow our orders.
I couldn't say anything. A boy. It was a boy. I would have a boy.
-OK. I'll be with you in the afternoon. In case you want to call someone or need anything, don't hesitate to ask from a nurse, ok? Take it easy.

-Mom?
I had determined to stay strong but as soon as I heard her voice I started to cry.
-Sweet darling, are you ok?
-As much as I can be, I said. �What about you? Is dad still alive or did I cause him a heart attack?
-Almost, mom laughed. �Why didn't you tell us? Don't you think it's something we ought to know?
-It's not like you're suddenly becoming grandparents.
-No, but it's first one you're having.
-I wanted to tell you face to face. But now�
-I know, darling, I know. You have to do what's best for the baby. I already called airline, they'll change your ticket to some other day. Or actually to me. I'm coming over.
-Mom, no.
-Don't say no to me. You need me to be there.
-What are you gonna do? Where are we gonna stay?
There was more in that, more that I wanted to tell her, more than I could have told her.
-We'll take care of that once I get there.
-No, mom, you can't come here. Not now. I mean, I want you to be here when this baby is born. Both of you. But until that I have to manage on my own.
-How are you going to do that?
-Well, I have Oliver and Charlene here�
-Is Oliver father? Are you still together? You told us that you separated last year.
-We did. And he's not the father. Please, mother, I don't want to get into this right now.
-Eventually you have to tell us.
-Eventually maybe, I said. �But not right now. And you're not coming over here.
-How are you going to manage out there? You should rest. They're not going to hold you in a hospital forever.
To be honest I haven't thought that far. But I didn't want to admit that to my mom. So I stayed though.
-I'll have to rest now. I'll call you later when I know more, ok? Tell dad I love him. I love you too. Try not to worry. Things will get better, I promise.
-We love you. Never forget that.
-I wont. Talk to you later. Bye.

I knew whom I would have to call. So in the afternoon I asked Oliver to go home to sleep. They had been changing shifts with Charlene � who was smiling like an idiot all the time she looked at me. But there was one person I had to see in private.
-You just can't get rid of this city, can you?
Jacob had been shocked hearing that I was still in town. It was fun to tell him not to get mad at me, it was doctor's order. I smiled to him.
-To be honest, are you ok? he asked.
-I think I will be, I said. �It's weird. I don't feel like being sick or anything. I'm just tired, like I've been most of my life. My baby's doing fine, you can feel him if you want to.
I placed Jacob's hands on my tummy. He held it there for a while and grinned when he felt a kick.
-Doesn't that hurt? he asked.
-No. First it was more like having gas pains. Now it's just a good sign. Sure, if he wants to be awake when I try to sleep, it gets annoying. But then again he's my son.
-So it's a boy?
I nodded and smiled. Jacob pulled chair next to my bed and sat down. Suddenly he looked serious.
-I think I know why you asked me to come.
-I think you do, I said. �You didn't call Tina or anything?
-Actually I did. I lied to her. That you had called from Finland, arrived safely and that you'd call or write to her as soon as possible.
-That's good. You know what the problem is.
-Even after all this you're not ready to tell him? Jacob asked. �Do you know how selfish you are?
-Right now, do you think that I would do that? See him coming here, followed with press, cameras all around the hospital, paparazzi pretending to be nurses� I'm supposed to take it easy, you know.
-It's possible without him coming here, you know that, Jacob said. �If you stay in New York�
-I have to.
-Then you have to face the possibility that this will come out. Whether you wanted it or not. AJ's ex-girlfriend pregnant: "I almost lost his son but I don't want him to know".
-Why do you always make such a big deal out of everything?
-Because this is a big deal, Jacob said. �This is so big deal, you can't even imagine.
-So do you already know why I asked you to come?
I looked at him while he started to ponder. I was surprised that it hadn't crossed his mine earlier.
-You need me to cover for you, right?
-Very much so, Jacob, very much so.

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