When I was a teenager I grew up in and out of church. I always knew God was real but I never paid him any mind. Regardless of how many times I was asked to attend chuch, I always refused. I'd say things like, " I have better things to do" or "I don't want to go around that bunch of hypocrites" It wasn't until I turned 16 that my life turned onto to path of self destruction. I began to expierement, as many teenagers do, with things I knew where no good for me.(I don't want to talk about those in deepth on this page, but on a personal level if anyone wants to know I'll be more than happy to talk to you) As a few years passed I bacame hard and angry at the world. I hated everyone and everything. No one could reach out to me because I wouldn't let them. I wanted to handle my "life" by myself (though I might add I was making a mockery of it). I joined the local rescue squad and fire department when I was eighteen. It was then things started taking a turn for the worse for me. I became somewhat suicidal and was still messing around in stupid stuff. I began to see things in a new light though. I saw death for what it really was and the things I saw and sent through there taught me alot. A friend of mine had recently been saved and had been trying to get me to church, but as always I refused. A few months later, things got even worse (I didn't think that was possible). I was on the brink of a nervous breakdown. My life fell apart (I was then almost 21), nothing was right. I was lossing what friends I had, I had no job, and this particular week I had seen three deaths in four days, two of which where suicides. I finally reach a breaking point in my truck at around five o'clock in the morning. I realized that there was more to life than "ME". In a cry of desperation I called out to God . For the first time ever I saw who God really was. He was a caring and loving God. He loved me despite all my silliness. He was a living and powerful God. I was saved that morning in my vehicle. I went to church the next sunday, and boy was I ever blown away. God touched me. He set me on fire. I felt a fire in my soul that I had never felt before. I was taken to a new high that no substance on this earth could ever take me. Since then I have been set ablaze for the gospel of Jesus Christ. The bible says that God is a consuming fire and I have found this to be true. There is nothing I would rather have or feel than the touch of the Living God. And the things that still amazes me to this day, He took me, a wasted life and gave me meaning. I have since then learned to love again, learn to allow people into my life, I have a great job, a wonderful realtionship, and better yet, God has called me to minister. I get the priviledge of taking His word to others, others who like the old me, maybe be on a path of self destruction. I would that no one would ever have to go through the things that I went through, so I pray that my words here touch someone's life. And if anyone wants to talk about Jesus feel free to email me.
In His Love -
Tina |
