AGE 21
SEX please (OHAHAHAHA)
LOCATION newtown
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS SEAGULLS AT GRANVILLE BUS DEPOT? because you keep feeding them. They'll never go away if you keep feeding them dearie.
PICK THE MISSING WORD: THE MAJESTY OF ROCK THE ______________ OF ROLL FADGEBLANKET
WHICH IS BETTER LOBSTERS OR PHONEBOXES AND WHY? phoneboxes are better because you can go in them and come out a superhero!! or a lobster!!
IF YOU WERE A LESBIAN POET IN LOVE WHAT KIND OF POEM WOULD YOU WRITE? a sonnet
with the word 'nipples' and 'moist' and the phrase 'ample bosoms' used many times over.
HOW MANY WEETBIX DO YOU HAVE TO EAT TO BE A MASTER OF RUGBY? 4! no, it must be more than that.
WHAT ARE THE THREE BEST THINGS IN THE WORLD? sex, cigarettes, and chocolate. (carmello koalas in particular)
WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN YOUR ORGY? the pope, drew barrymore, angelina jolie, and everyone from table 6.
WHAT IS THAT SHAKIRA ON ABOUT WITH HER BREASTS AND WHAT NOT? i do not know. I only know she sings badly.
WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BARING THEIR MIDRIFF? IS IT A DISEASE? yes, it's worse than leprosy, and huge in africa.
WHICH IS BETTER FAMILY TIES, WHO'S THE BOSS OR GROWING PAINS (or whatever it is called) AND WHY? clearly family ties is the best. My first ever big crush was on michael j fox in family ties, and i wanted to be jennifer, especially in the episode where she turned into a valley girl. She was like, so cool.
WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG GUVNOR? my secret spy notebook.
CAN A MULLET EVER BE SEXY? LIKE FOR EXAMPLE IF IT IS ON A FRENCH MAN? not in this world.
WHAT ARE THE STROKES ALL ABOUT? WHY DOES EVERY CRAP PERSON LIKE THEM? i don't know, but sally has their album.
They are all about... guitars n stuff. yep.
AND FINALLY IF YOU WERE TOO BECOME LESBIAN ICE PRINCESS 2002 HOW WOULD YOU HELP THE WORLD? i would free the world from foot fungus, make everyone wear the shade of lipstick most flattering to their skin colouring, stab malcolm in the middle, and get more insane people talking to themselves on public transport. Because they are amusing, and i like them.
NAME? Jon Ross
AGE 28
SEX boy thing
LOCATION Chair by pc
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS SEAGULLS AT GRANVILLE BUS DEPOT? They can't afford a ticket to Skeggy.
PICK THE MISSING WORD: THE MAJESTY OF ROCK THE ______________ OF ROLL MYSTERY
WHICH IS BETTER LOBSTERS OR PHONEBOXES AND WHY? Lobsters.
They dont smell of wee.
IF YOU WERE A LESBIAN POET IN LOVE WHAT KIND OF POEM WOULD YOU WRITE? Pass. How many kinds of poems are there?
HOW MANY WEETBIX DO YOU HAVE TO EAT TO BE A MASTER OF RUGBY? Pass. Never been to Rugby.
Been to Bristol and they usually eat 3, so i reckon at least 5.
WHAT ARE THE THREE BEST THINGS IN THE WORLD? Orgies.
You.
Me.
WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN YOUR ORGY? See above.
WHAT IS THAT SHAKIRA ON ABOUT WITH HER BREASTS AND WHAT NOT? She is making a political statement against the lobster mens plans for world domination. ( see next Thursdays Daily sport).
WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BARING THEIR MIDRIFF? IS IT A DISEASE? Only thin people do this, its a nasty case of skinnyitus.
WHICH IS BETTER FAMILY TIES, WHO'S THE BOSS OR GROWING PAINS (or whatever it is called) AND WHY? Who's the boss.
It aint got M J Fox in it.
Don't know about the other one, never heard of it.
WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG GUVNOR? Clean pants.
CAN A MULLET EVER BE SEXY? LIKE FOR EXAMPLE IF IT IS ON A FRENCH MAN? Yes, see Tony Aston.
WHAT ARE THE STROKES ALL ABOUT? WHY DOES EVERY CRAP PERSON LIKE THEM? They get the symphathy vote because they're yanks and got weird hair.
AND FINALLY IF YOU WERE TOO BECOME LESBIAN ICE PRINCESS 2002 HOW WOULD YOU HELP THE WORLD? Kill myself.
NAME petra jane
AGE eleventeen
SEX no thanks [HA HA bet you didn't see that coming!!!4]
LOCATION new zilun' bro
EMAIL [email protected]
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS SEAGULLS AT GRANVILLE BUS DEPOT? um, cause it's the official station of the New Romantic movement. i ran, i ran so far awa-a-ay, just to get away. by the way, geocities is the suck. too many characters my ASS!
PICK THE MISSING WORD: THE MAJESTY OF ROCK THE ______________ OF ROLL FADGEBLANKET
WHICH IS BETTER LOBSTERS OR PHONEBOXES AND WHY? Well you can't get changed into superhero garb in a lobster, now can you?
IF YOU WERE A LESBIAN POET IN LOVE WHAT KIND OF POEM WOULD YOU WRITE? a really fucking dire winge-ing one with lots of flower similies. people in love should not write poems. girls should not write poems. people in love with girls, as River Cuemos or whatever that speccy cunt's name is has proven over three albums, should ESPECIALLY not write poems. the odds aren't good.
HOW MANY WEETBIX DO YOU HAVE TO EAT TO BE A MASTER OF RUGBY? Carl Hayman can do eight, mate!
WHAT ARE THE THREE BEST THINGS IN THE WORLD? [1] strong, black, sugarless coffee, served by [2] a cute floppy-haired nerdboy in [3] a nice warm feather-duvet-ed bed. like i got this morning. so i'm biased. and liable to write nauseating poetry with flower similies.
WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN YOUR ORGY? All ex-members of Look Blue Go Purple except maybe Kath W, a pink feather duster, plenty of lego and an original set of Autobots, not including the dinobots cause they were the suck.
WHAT IS THAT SHAKIRA ON ABOUT WITH HER BREASTS AND WHAT NOT? It's relevant social commentary, man. just the other day i woke up and thought "woah, i'm in Taupo...oh, wait, that's not Tongariro and Ngarahoe, that's my tits. WHOOPS!". i mean, happens to all of us, right?
WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BARING THEIR MIDRIFF? IS IT A DISEASE? it's like leperosy but instead of their feet and penises falling off it's the last 6" of their tops. or maybe all those slappers are just poor and can't afford the rest of the outfit.
WHICH IS BETTER FAMILY TIES, WHO'S THE BOSS OR GROWING PAINS (or whatever it is called) AND WHY? they were all painful and a big GRR for reminding me about ANY of them, thanks. you're going to hell.
WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG GUVNOR? want a sweetie, little girl?
CAN A MULLET EVER BE SEXY? LIKE FOR EXAMPLE IF IT IS ON A FRENCH MAN? can a french man be sexy?
WHAT ARE THE STROKES ALL ABOUT? WHY DOES EVERY CRAP PERSON LIKE THEM? like attracts like. they have Charisma Ken hair and dress like a bad Datsuns covers band. but without the truckdriver caps.
AND FINALLY IF YOU WERE TOO BECOME LESBIAN ICE PRINCESS 2002 HOW WOULD YOU HELP THE WORLD? i would employ a legion of floppy-haired rockboys to bring you all coffee in bed. in fact, i might hire the Strokes when the NME decides they're passe and they all need to get day-jobs again.
NAME Damian
AGE 23
SEX Human man
LOCATION Auckland
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS SEAGULLS AT GRANVILLE BUS DEPOT? Seagulls always stay near land, they only go out to sea to die.
PICK THE MISSING WORD: THE MAJESTY OF ROCK THE ______________ OF ROLL degreaser
WHICH IS BETTER LOBSTERS OR PHONEBOXES AND WHY? Phoneboxes are better because they don't have beady eyes and you can't put a lobster to your ear and speak into it if you need someone to come and pick you up and drive you home.
IF YOU WERE A LESBIAN POET IN LOVE WHAT KIND OF POEM WOULD YOU WRITE? Haikus by the dozen.
HOW MANY WEETBIX DO YOU HAVE TO EAT TO BE A MASTER OF RUGBY? 57, therefore putting rugby mastery out of everyone's reach and showing them that rugby is a futile waste of time and stomach.
WHAT ARE THE THREE BEST THINGS IN THE WORLD? Stereolab and some other things.
WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN YOUR ORGY? No one famous. The girl at Subway who looks like Amelie and some other female shop assistant.
WHAT IS THAT SHAKIRA ON ABOUT WITH HER BREASTS AND WHAT NOT? Maybe something was lost in translation.
WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BARING THEIR MIDRIFF? IS IT A DISEASE? Because it's there, just like Mount Everest.
WHICH IS BETTER FAMILY TIES, WHO'S THE BOSS OR GROWING PAINS (or whatever it is called) AND WHY? Family Ties, because ten-year-old me fancied Courteney Cox, and because of Mr. Keaton's beard and dress sense.
WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG GUVNOR? Pens and books.
CAN A MULLET EVER BE SEXY? LIKE FOR EXAMPLE IF IT IS ON A FRENCH MAN? It hurts to think about.
WHAT ARE THE STROKES ALL ABOUT? WHY DOES EVERY CRAP PERSON LIKE THEM? The Strokes are all about the History Of Rock (NME TM), and they're ugly.
AND FINALLY IF YOU WERE TOO BECOME LESBIAN ICE PRINCESS 2002 HOW WOULD YOU HELP THE WORLD? With Sooty and Sweep impressions I could bring about peace among jungle tribes.
NAME Baron von Discogod
AGE 21
SEX Are you offering?
LOCATION Yeah, I'm curious to that too
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS SEAGULLS AT GRANVILLE BUS DEPOT? My guess is that it's due to all the heroin on the roof.
PICK THE MISSING WORD: THE MAJESTY OF ROCK THE ______________ OF ROLL MYSTERY
WHICH IS BETTER LOBSTERS OR PHONEBOXES AND WHY? Lobsters. Dr. Zoidberg is a lobster, and he is my second favourite doctor and favourite lobster. The late Mr. Pinchy was also a lobster, god rest his soul.
IF YOU WERE A LESBIAN POET IN LOVE WHAT KIND OF POEM WOULD YOU WRITE? I'd re-write "Howl", but change every 4th word to 'flange'.
HOW MANY WEETBIX DO YOU HAVE TO EAT TO BE A MASTER OF RUGBY? What, in one sitting?
WHAT ARE THE THREE BEST THINGS IN THE WORLD? 3 big boxes of porn.
WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN YOUR ORGY? No other men apart from me. 17 women of virtue true, and some eels.
WHAT IS THAT SHAKIRA ON ABOUT WITH HER BREASTS AND WHAT NOT? Who cares? She'd get it dry, anyday.
WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BARING THEIR MIDRIFF? IS IT A DISEASE? It's a ploy to make me jealous, what with my inability to get a 6-pack, the bastards
WHICH IS BETTER FAMILY TIES, WHO'S THE BOSS OR GROWING PAINS (or whatever it is called) AND WHY? Can I have Diff'rent Strokes instead?
WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG GUVNOR? A nice jaunty hat.
CAN A MULLET EVER BE SEXY? LIKE FOR EXAMPLE IF IT IS ON A FRENCH MAN? The fish or the haircut?
WHAT ARE THE STROKES ALL ABOUT? WHY DOES EVERY CRAP PERSON LIKE THEM? The Strokes? Pah. Now Jon and Vangelis, THAT'S music.
AND FINALLY IF YOU WERE TOO BECOME LESBIAN ICE PRINCESS 2002 HOW WOULD YOU HELP THE WORLD? I wouldn't help the world. I would use it in my quest to become Evil Overlord of the planet.