Friday.
I'd been alone for most of the day, they tend to linger at the bar, I don blame them, Lucy is a lovely girl. Well today she plonked me on the table in the corner, next to the fire. Nobody goes there till late when every other table is taken, its got crap chairs and the leather is peeling off the bench. I'd never been there before, I've not been here long see, I'm one of the newest. Last night in the glass room Guinness told me he'd been there four times in the last week, getting sick of it he was. He said this pair of really chavvy women sat there every night he was on and they'd been planning to kill the fat one's husband. I didn't' believe him, daft sod. He said it sounded like it had been going on for months, only now it was coming to a head cause they planned to do it this weekend see. He said they'd worked out three different ways of doing it but couldn't decide.
Well tonight, when they waddled over to me with their G & T's and fags in hand they started whispering straight away. The fat one was seriously twitchy, constantly flicking at me and ripping bits of paper up. Well, they couldn't make their minds up could they? The first option was something like poisoning him, over a long time like, but I only caught the gist of it. The skinny one said, 'It'll take too long wont it? At home? I know it'll be the easiest cause you said he likes his food on the table every night, he never misses, but you want this sorted before he works out what you've been planning, he got close yesterday when he found that piccalilli.' The fat one jumped on the offensive, 'What I've been planning? You've been with me all the way love.'
'Oh, you know what I mean, but he'd go apeshit if he worked it out, he kill us, and he en dull is he, that�s why, like I said, we gotta be careful.'
The fat one stopped talking and just puffed on her fag like the whole weight of it all was too much for her. I see what Guinness meant now. Her lips do curl too far when she breathes out smoke, like a wannabe film star or summat. Probably ideas above her see. That�s why she wants rid, thinks he en good enough for her. See, she en much to look at, so I can't see her having anyone else on the go.
The skinning one broke the silence, 'did you buy that stuff I told you to get off jimmy? Where is it?'
'In the Asda bags, wa d'you thing it was? My weekly shop?'
'I dunno. Will he keep quiet about it? Won't mention it to magsy?' Fatty looked doubtful 'I think so.'
They sat there for a while going over it and over it, how fatty would have to make an excuse to get out of the house and help skinny set it all up and then fatty would have to go home and get him out of the house on the pretence of going 'down the pub' see. Sounded like they didn't want any evidence in the house to tie them too it. Like they were gonna do it in the alley or behind the pub or summat. It didn't sound too clever, if they'd bin planning this a long time like Guinness recons then they weren�t too bright.
It was coming to the end of the night, Lucy had rung the bell, twice, and they didn't seem keen to go home. Fatty kept looking at her watch and dragging her dregs out to last ages.
Skinny could sense something was up, like me, 'He'll be in bed wont he by now?'
'Hoping.' I sudden thought, maybe I got fatty all wrong. Out every night with her mate, not keen to go home, dinner on table same time every day. Maybe she was one of them battered wives you read about, what if that was why?
Eyeball to eyeball they sat, hunched and hushed, like this was it, this was the last meeting of the troops. As she reached through the haze to kill her last fag, like her last meal, Fatty whispered to her conspirator, 'what time should we do it?'
Her comrade said, 'When he least expects it, I think.'
Saturday.
I bin worrying most of the night, couldn't sleep. Fatty seemed too dull to pull it off, her mate didn't seem much cleverer. What if they got in trouble? What if he found out before they could do it? What if he over-powered her and done her in instead? It kept going round and round in my head. You see, I feel such a dickhead, Guinness en saying much either, too ashamed I think. I never told no-one see, but Guinness told everyone just like he told me. He had a little book going see, on if they would do it, if we would see em on Wales Today on the telly in the bar. He had me riled up see, wasn't thinking, adrenalin and all that. Little bit of excitement.
They turned up at the pub see, Fatty and her friend, bout three o'clock, with all these boxes and Asda bags. Lucy helped em, they moved all the tables into rows and started putting out all these trays covered in plastic. Didn't really know what they were up to, until the Carling boys started laughing, you could here em from the lounge. Murder! In Pont? What the hell was I thinking?
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