CHAPTER 22

Two weeks had passed and Backstreet was in the Arena's Rehearsal Hall. They were using a different stage, but the old stage was still stored at the arena. They were in the process of learning the new dance routines and getting use to the new band. The next day they left for a video shoot and would be gone for the weekend. Everyone knew things had changed between Nick and Kassidy, but respected their privacy. AJ was still doing his "I'm a bad boy" routine and going out every night. All in all things were moving along smoothly.

"Come on I've got a surprise for you!"

"Nick what are you up to?"

"You'll see."

Nick was waiting for Kassidy when she parked her car in the loading dock of the arena. He pulled her from her car and led her into the bowl. She had to smile at his enthusiasm. They walked into the arena where the stage was set up. The guys and band were all on stage. Nick didn't stop until they were on the stage.

"OK what is the surprise? By the way, hello everybody," greeted Kassidy and was rewarded with hellos from everyone.

"Hang on. Dave buddy come up here."

Dave was responsible for the boys flying on the last tour and had been brought back while they decided if they wanted to use the rig again. He came up with a harness. He laid it down and picked up Kassidy. The look on her face was priceless.

"Nickolas if you do not tell me what is going on, I'm leaving."

"All right. Grace said you wanted to fly. Dave will she be safe?"

"Yeah she'll be safe."

"Wait. You guys can't be serious."

"What's the matter Kassidy? Chicken," teased Brian.

Kassidy gave him a look and said, "No, but I can't exactly do it in this suit."

"That's OK baby. I brought you some clothes," said Nick with a smile.

"Let me get changed. Where are my clothes?"

Nick led her to the dressing room. Nick explained they had decided not to use the flight rig for the new tour. Nick had talked them into letting her fly before the crew took it down that night. Kassidy changed and they headed back to the stage.

Everyone had taken seats to watch. They all under estimated Kassidy's love of things that frightened her. She allowed Dave to put the harness on. She just sweetly smiled as everyone teased her about looking nervous. She was nervous, but it was the same nervous most people experienced when getting ready to ride a roller coaster. She made Nick promise they would not leave her hanging.

Dave asked her if she was ready and she said yes. He took it easy on her at first. He lifted her slowly and raised her part way out from the stage then slowly lowered her back down. She told him to do it the same way he did with the guys. So he let loose. She squealed with delight as she felt herself being pulled through the air. As he brought her back she flipped so she was upside down. She told him to stop for a moment. She asked Kevin to explained flipping. It took her a moment, but soon she was flipping through the air, laughing the entire time. Finally, she asked to be brought down.

Dave unhooked her and she leaped for Nick, kissing him. The adrenaline rush was incredible. She forgot they were in front of other people. She shyly pulled back from him.

"Aww Kassi's blushing," said AJ.

"Like she just got caught," added the new drummer.

"I hate to burst your bubble," called Leighanne. "We already figured out you two were together."

"Oh," said Kassidy.

"Now people can we get back to work," called James, the boys manager.

"Did you have fun Kassidy?"

"It was a blast! Thanks so much."

"It wasn't me. Nick did this for you."

"Thanks Nick."

"You can thank me later," teased Nick.

Kassidy joined Leighanne to watch the rehearsal. During a break later in the evening, AJ called Grace. He had to tell her about Kassidy's wild ride. He had her in tears; she was laughing so hard. He had another reason for calling. He wanted to invite her to the video shoot. They were flying to LA to meet up with Wayne Isham again.

"But Grace I will pay for the ticket."

"AJ I can't. First of all the ticket would cost too much and I don't care if you are buying it. Secondly my parents will never agree. Third, I have plans for Tomorrow night."

"You have a date?"

"Not really a date. I am meeting some friends. We are all going off to school and don't know when we will see each other again."

"You sure I can't change your mind?"

"No AJ you can't, but thanks for offering."

"Anytime Pooh. Oops I'm getting the evil eye. Here talk to Kassidy."

"Grace?"

"Hey."

"How are you?"

"I'm OK."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing. I just turned AJ down."

"Turned him down?"

"Yeah he wanted me to meet them in LA for the video shoot."

"I will miss not seeing, but don't blame you for saying no. It will do him some good to be told no."

"Yeah well I doubt it phased him. Anyway, how are things with Nick?"

"Good. I guess."

"Why do you say it that way?"

"Because this is not a realistic thing. I am so much older than him. You know this will not last."

"You never know. However, I do see what you are saying. So what are you going to do?"

"Enjoy it while it lasts."

"Good plan. I've got to go."

"Take care of you."

"You too. Bye."

"Bye."

Later that evening, her phone ringing awakened Grace.

"Hello?"

"Come to LA."

Grace laughed, "No AJ."

"Come on Pooh. You know you want to."

"Well we all don't get what we want."

"I do."

"Not this time."

"Pooh," whined AJ.

"Alex."

"Fine. So what are you doing tomorrow night when you could be in LA?"

"AJ stop it."

"OK, but what are you doing?"

"We are going over to a friends and watch a movie."

"A guy's house?"

"Yes a guy's house. He's a friend."

"Fine."

"AJ don't," said Grace quietly.

"Don't get upset. I'm sorry. I will stop giving you a hard time."

"So how were rehearsals?"

"Good."

"Are you ready for the video shoot?"

"Yeah. It won't be as much fun since you aren't coming. I'm being serious, but it will be fine."

"Look I'm need to get some sleep."

"Night Pooh."

"Night AJ."

It was the second day of the video shoot and things were moving along. Wayne had just called lunch. On the way to the Boys trailer, Nick decided he wanted a kiss so he dipped Kassidy and kissed her. She laughed as he picked her up and carried her to the trailer. No one noticed the high power lens trained on the couple. The photographer was across the street and got several great pictures. The shoot continued then it was back to Nashville for more rehearsals.

The following week Kassidy was in the grocery store and thought she was getting some strange looks. It didn't click until she saw a picture of Nick kissing her. The headline read "Backstreet Boy has found he's own Mrs. Robinson". Kassidy grabbed a copy and paid for her groceries. She was lucky she made it home, because she didn't remember anything about the drive.

She dropped the bags of groceries and grabbed the paper. She curled up on the couch and read the article. They knew her name. They had interviewed Angie. Her record contract had been canceled when her label was merged with another one. So she had nothing to loose.

Kassi drove to the arena with the article lying in the passenger seat. This was bad. It was bad for both of them. As much as Nick protected his private life, Kassidy liked her privacy even more.

She walked in and stopped the rehearsal. She pulled all the guys along with James into a room. She read the article to them. They were all surprised. Nick went ballistic. It took both Brian and Kassidy to calm him down. Kevin took charge and asked James what they could do legally. James said there really wasn't anything they could do. After going round in circles for an hour, they decided to call it a night. Nick pulled Kassidy onto the van with them and they all headed back to the hotel.

Kassidy spent most of the night watching Nick sleep. He was convinced it would all be fine. Of course that was before his mom called demanding to know who this woman was in the tabloid. Nick stood his ground. His mother was not pleased. To Kassidy it seemed like the nightmare was just getting bigger. She called Kevin while Nick went to play basketball with Brian.

"Hey Kassidy."

"Can we talk?"

"Sure. You want me to come to you or you come to me?"

"Can you come here?"

"Sure be there in five."

True to his word Kevin was knocking on Nick's door in five minutes. "Thanks Kevin."

"Sure. Now what's going on?"

"I need a sounding board."

"Shoot."

Kassidy took a deep breath and began, "This thing with Nick caught me by surprise. I really love him."

"I know you do."

"But I really don't see how it can work. Let me finish. We are at two completely different places in our lives. I am certainly closer to being ready to settle down and have a family that he is. And let's face it this little tabloid thing is only the beginning. It will affect you guys negatively."

"Are you saying you want to end this with Nick?"

"I think so. I want him to be part of my life, but I don't know if it's fair to ask him. God Kevin I don't want to hurt him."

"I know, but I think you are right about being in two different places. Nick still has a lot of growing up to do. The publicity we can deal with, but you've got to do what your heart tells you. If you want to end this with Nick I will support you."

"Kevin I can't believe you."

"Nick," exclaimed Kassidy.

"No Kass. Kevin get the fuck out of my room and leave Kass alone! I can't believe you would try and talk her into leaving me!"

"No Nick," started Kevin.

"Get out Kevin."

"Nick," yelled Kassidy.

"What," asked Nick.

"Kevin, Brian can you leave us alone."

"Sure Kassidy," said Kevin as he and Brian left the room.

"Kass what's going on," asked Nick.

"Nick I need you to listen to me."

"I don't think I'll like this."

"You're not going to like it."

"You are not breaking up with me," he said emphatically.

"Nick we weren't really a couple."

"Kassidy I love you. I made love to you!"

Kassidy began to cry as she struggled to explain, "Nick this hasn't been real. It's been a wonderful dream. But our friendship is the reality. We are at two different places in our life."

"Bullshit!"

"Not bullshit. I am ready to settle down, get married and have a family. And if you are really honest with yourself, you aren't there."

"Kass why are you doing this? Why are you pushing me away?"

"Baby I'm not pushing you away. What I'm doing is saving us. We can continue being friends. As empty as it sounds, it is true. I will always be there for you. You need me, I'm there."

"Well I don't want you there or anywhere so just go. You don't love me so get out!"

"Nick I will go, but I'm always just a phone call away."

"Whatever."

Kassidy left. She went to Brian's room and asked him to keep an eye on Nick. She said good-bye to Leighanne and Kevin, who had gone with Brian to his room to explain.

She managed to make it home before breaking down and crying. It was all logical she told herself, but she hated it. The next morning, she went to work. There were a few stares. She just glared back and dared anyone to say anything. She went into her office and threw herself into her work. She didn't come up until there was a knock on her door.

"Come in."

"Hey Kassidy. Lunch time."

"Kevin I don't feel like it."

"Too bad, you are going with me," said her co-worker.

"Fine."

They went down to Jody's.

After they ordered, Kevin said, "So you ended things with Nick."

"Ended what?"

"Don't even try. I know you two were a thing."

"We aren't now."

"I'm sorry. I know you really cared about him. You two going to stay in touch?"

"Not if Nick has anything to say about it."

"Well he's young and he's hurt."

"Yes and I did it."

"He will get over it. Now on to the next topic, us."

"Huh," asked a puzzled Kassidy.

"Us as in you and me. When are you going to go out with me?"

"Are you on crack?"

"No. Kassidy I think you are one of the most amazing women I've ever met. We get along. Go out with me. Let's just see if there is something there. What have you got to loose?"

Kassidy thought a moment before responding, "I will go out with you as friends, but not until the guys leave."

CHAPTER 23

"Hello."

"Pooh!"

"Hey AJ. How's it going?"

"You know me, it's all good. How about you?"

"I'm good."

"Ya still like college."

"Yes. You glad the tour is over?"

"For now I suppose. So you are going to Kassidy's wedding right?"

"Hello! I'm in it. You going?"

"Of course!"

"Anyone else going?"

"Everyone, but well you know."

"Nick."

"You got it. Brian is still working on him" stated AJ.

"I know it's hard for him."

"It is, but he's started sorta seeing someone."

"Really? Who," asked Grace.

"Just some girl who works at Disney."

"Well that's good. I guess."

"We shall see. Hey is that a knock I hear?"

"Yeah my date is here."

"Date?"

"Yeah. I gotta go AJ. Talk to you later."

"Sure Pooh. Bye."

"Bye."

AJ stared at the phone for a minute. He hadn't known Grace was seeing anyone. Of course she as a grown woman and should be dating. He couldn't figure out why it bothered him so much. It wasn't like they were involved. And it wasn't because he lacked companionship; he had that any night he wanted. He would just have to quiz his Pooh about who she was seeing.

"Come on Nick."

"No Brian."

"Why not?"

"I don't want to watch her walk down the aisle to some other guy."

"I understand, but don't you miss your friendship?"

"Yes, but I miss loving her more."

"But you are seeing Candace."

"She's not Kassidy."

"No, but she's very sweet and she's good to you."

"I just don't understand why she did it."

"Nick you will have to ask Kassidy that yourself."

"Guess I'll never know."

Six months had passed since the guys were in Nashville. They had toured Europe, Asia, and one the first leg of their US tour. They were currently on a break. Kevin and AJ had stayed in touch with Kassidy after they left Nashville. She had also stayed in touch with Leighanne and Kristen. She had attended both Kevin and Brian's wedding, along with Grace. She had kept her distance from Nick, because both weddings happened not too long after she ended things with him. It killed her to see the hurt in his eyes. She had been torn about going, because she knew it would hurt them both, but Leighanne and Kristen had insisted.

In the middle of everything, Kassidy gave in and went out with Kevin Wadkins. Soon they were spending time together. After awhile, everyone assumed they were a couple. Finally, Kevin told her he loved her. She didn't say it until she felt it, but when she did Kevin asked her to marry him. Now it was few days before the wedding.

Kevin never voiced a problem with her friendship with the guys. He liked them all. Of course, Nick was not in the picture so that made it easier. Kassidy and Kevin were comfortable together. They picked out a house and moved in a month prior to the wedding. They agreed on the wedding. It would be simple. The only even slight argument they had was over the song to use.

"How about this song," asked Kevin.

Kassidy looked up to see Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey on the TV screen. It was the video for "Where You Are."

She laughed, "Do you know the premise of this song?"

"No."

"He has died, but they want to be together."

"Cool. So what do you think?"

"No. I am not having a song where someone has died."

"But."

"No Kevin."

"All right. Tell you what, you can sing it at my funeral." He continued, "I was only teasing."

"I don't think its funny. You just don't get it. Call me silly but I don't want the image of death as part of my wedding. I mean it's already very evident with the absence of my parents."

"I'm sorry," he soothed as he pulled her into his arms.

"Just don't joke about your death like that ok?"

"How about a Backstreet Boys song?"

Kassidy fell over laughing

"Maybe not," said Kevin.

Kassidy was putting away her wedding dress as she replayed the conversation in her mind. She got a chill when she thought about Kevin's suggestion. She shook her head to clear it. She couldn't figure out why it had her so spooked. She dismissed it as wedding jitters. She heard the front door open as she closed the closet door. She had picked up all the dresses for the wedding party and put her dress in the back of her closet so Kevin wouldn't see it. She had bought a dress very similar to the one he had picked in a bridal magazine.

"Hey honey we're home," he called through the house.

"We? So you actually went and got her, instead of making her fend for herself."

"Yes he did, but I have to pay him and give a big tip."

"Hi Grace," said Kassidy as she entered the living room where Grace and Kevin were standing.

"Honey will you put her bags in the guestroom."

Only if I get my payment," said Kevin as he puckered up.

Kassidy kissed him then turned to hug Grace.

"I'm so glad you're here."

"Hey you put me in your wedding, I figured I better show. So how are things coming?"

"They're coming. I have your dress upstairs."

"I hope it fits."

"It will. Come on."

They shooed Kevin down to the kitchen to make dinner, while they talked and Grace tried on her dress. She along with Kevin's two sisters were Kassidy's bridesmaids. Kassidy's best friend, Michael was her matron of honor.

Grace looked great in the light blue dress Kassidy had picked out. Kevin had wanted the wedding to be done in blue.

"That really brings out your eyes Grace."

"I like it Kassidy. So are you nervous?"

"Some, but I think I've got everything under control. How the semester going?"

"Good. Classes are ok. Of course, calculus will be the end of me. I talked to AJ the other day."

"How is Bone?"

"He's Bone. He said almost everyone was coming to the wedding."

"I didn't think Nick would show up. So are you and AJ going to spend some quality time together?"

"I don't know. He sounded funny the other night, but I couldn't quiz him on it. My date had knocked."

"Your date," interrupted Kassidy. "Tell me about this date."

"It's just a guy from my chem class. His name is Justin. He's OK."

"Just OK?"

"He's pretty hot, but I don't know."

"Interesting. I wonder what was up with AJ."

"No clue. It will be good to see them again. And Kassidy, I'm sorry Nick's not going to be here. I know you wish you were still friends."

"True. However I can't blame him."

"And for what it's worth I really like Kevin. He's a good guy and he worships the ground you walk on."

"A quality I like in a husband," joked Kassidy. "Let's get down to the kitchen and help with dinner. He tends to go all out when cooking and it could be midnight before we eat."

"I hope not. I'm starving."

CHAPTER 24

"We've come to save the day," sang AJ as Kassidy's fianc�, Kevin, opened the front door.

"Save it from what," asked Kevin with a smirk.

AJ thought for a moment then sang, "We've come to save the day!"

"Save it for inside will ya! It's cold out here," called Brian from the back of the line.

Everyone piled in the living room. They kicked snow from their shoes as they came through the door.

"Bone if you came to save the day, why did you bring snow with you," asked Kassidy coming in from the kitchen.

"You people choose to live in the arctic. I come from Florida, the land of no snow."

"Give me your coats and I will put them in the guest room," instructed Kevin. "And hello to everyone."

"Hello soon to be chained, I mean married man," teased Howie.

"Howard with an attitude like that you will always be single," scolded Fatima.

"It's the mommy to be," exclaimed Kassidy.

"Yeah I was bringing up the rear with the help of Brian and Kevin. They are playing caretakers since daddy couldn't come with me."

"That's too bad, but you look wonderful. Hey in there, I'm Kassidy. We will meet soon enough."

"Are you going to hug us or what," asked AJ.

"Excuse me, I was remiss," said Kassidy.

She walked past AJ to hug Howie. She then made her way around to everyone saving AJ for last. He gave her look then pulled her into a hug. The front door opened and Grace walked in. Everyone pounced and hugged her. AJ didn't let go until she told him she needed to breathe. The friends settled in for a visit. Kassidy enjoyed seeing all of them again, but she wished Nick was there. True she missed him, but she also wanted to make sure he was all right.

"I swear you people are insane," exclaimed AJ.

"I have to agree with AJ," added Howie.

"You wimps," chided Kassidy. "You would let a little snow prevent you from grilling."

"Yes," they all shouted.

"You notice she is talking big when she's not the one going out there," said Kevin as he returned from checking the grill.

"I'm sorry were you saying something," teased Kassidy.

Her fianc�'s reply was to pick her up and carry her out into the snow. He dropped her down in a drift. It had snowed about 3" the night before, Kevin had shoveled the patio and the pile of snow made a great place for her land. She was in her sock feet, but merely stood up and started throwing snow at everyone. Soon they were in a hug snowball fight. Finally the food was ready and everyone filled plates and gathered back in the living room.

"Kev," asked Kassidy.

"Yes," replied the two Kevins in the room.

"Richardson you are Kevin or Richardson. My soon to be husband is Kev."

"Got it," chuckled Kevin.

"Now Kev will you start a fire?"

"Sure."

Leighanne asked, "Kassidy how can we help?"

"I think everything is under control."

"She's right," agreed Grace from a seat on the floor by AJ. "She has this timed with military precision."

"Well if you need anything just give us a yell. We are all staying at Anne's Condo or Jackie and Harold's house," stated Kristen.

"I will. Thanks."

"And Kevin we are taking you out after the rehearsal dinner tomorrow night," stated Brian.

"What?"

"It's the bachelor party dude," explained AJ.

"You better not keep him out too late. I want good pictures on the wedding day," threatened Kassidy with a smirk.

"Do I have a say," asked Kevin and the reply was no.

"Who else do you want there?"

"Just a couple of my friends and my best man and groomsmen. I will call them tomorrow."

"Good. Kevin can your friends meet us at the rehearsal dinner," asked Kevin.

"I'm sure they can."

"Then we are all set," said AJ with a gleam in his eye.

"Howie can you do me a favor," asked Kassidy. "And yes I am changing the subject. What I don't know about tomorrow night won't hurt Kevin or any of you guys."

"What Kassi," asked Howie as everyone laughed.

"Will you look after someone during the wedding?"

"Sure who?"

"My friend Maddie is coming down from Medicine Hat."

"As in Canada," asked Howie.

"Yes. We met online in the Band Chatroom, so she is a fan. However, she's 24 and will not freak out, promise. She is coming for my wedding not to meet you guys."

"No problem. Does she know we are coming?"

"Not yet, only because I missed her last call telling me her flight time. I will show you a picture of her later."

"Cool. I will make sure she is fine."

"That's why I selected you over AJ."

"Hey I'm hurt."

"Alex let's look at the nicknames. Boner. Sweetness."

"Fine. I will just look out for Fatima."

"Oh Lord help us," joked Fatima before hugging AJ.

The little party broke up around midnight. Kassidy pulled Brian back as they walked to the cars.

"How's Nick? Or do I have the right to ask?"

"You're still his friend Kassi. I wish he would stop being such a stubborn 20 year old."

Kassidy smiled and said, "But that's what he is Brian. Is he doing OK? I mean in general."

"Pretty much. He's in that new house of his and I think he doesn't know what to do with all that space."

"Plus he's not really use to being alone," added Kassidy.

"You said it. I think he will be fine and eventually he will come around."

"I hope so. Well keep an eye on him."

"I always do."

Kassidy kissed his cheek and he climbed in the car. Kevin, Kassidy, and Grace watched everyone pull away then headed back inside. After cleaning up they all went to bed.

The next day was hectic. Michael arrived. Her husband was to get there the next day in time for the wedding. Kevin's sisters came over to get their dresses along with his mom. Mrs. Wadkins kept hugging Kassidy and telling her how happy they were to have her as part of the family. After they left, Kassidy, Michael and Grace got ready for the rehearsal dinner.

The rehearsal was hectic, but went well. The dinner was a nice time for everyone to talk. Finally, the would be partygoers showed up and whisked Kevin away. He was staying at his parent's house so he would not see Kassidy before the wedding.

Grace, Michael and Kassidy headed back to the house. They planned on making it an early evening. However an unexpected knock on the door changed those plans. The women had gone to bed, so Kassidy threw on her robe and headed to the front door. She assumed it was some of the partygoers so she didn't look before opening it. She opened the door and before she could say anything she was being kissed. She knew in an instant it was Nick. Once you had felt his lips you never forgot them. She gently pulled away.

"Hi Nick".

"Hi," he quietly replied.

"Come in. Does anyone know you're here?"

"No. Brian called early this morning. I knew Kevin wouldn't be here so I had to come."

"I see. So you're here, now what?"

"I don't know."

"Yes you do. Just say it."

"Don't marry Kevin."

"Nick," she began. "You can't do this to me now."

"Kass, I love you. I'm not some stupid kid. I don't care about the press or my family or anything else."

"Nick I never thought you were a stupid kid. And you may not care about any of those things right now, but some day you will."

"Do you love him?"

"Of course I do. I wouldn't marry him if I didn't," she said in a biting tone.

"Like you love me," asked Nick, not backing down.

"No, but I do love him."

"So you still love me," he said rather than asked.

"Nick I will always love you. You're my friend."

"Damn it Kassidy you know what I mean."

"Yes I do, but Nick we can't be together. Our timing was off. I love you too much to have you one day regret being with me. You need to experience some things before you settle down. Plus I do love Kevin. I am going to marrying him tomorrow and we are going to spend the rest of our lives together. I also want you to be apart of my life, but understand if you don't want to."

Nick sat for a moment not looking at her, because it hurt too much. She was wearing a robe and he knew her well enough to know there was nothing underneath. He hated that his body reacted. He hated more the thought of never seeing her again. He also realized his coming here meant that he wanted to be in her life any way possible. If it meant just being her friend he would take it.

"All right Kass. You win. I want our friendship back."

"Nick look at me." Nick locked eyes with her and she continued, "I've really missed you and you know if you ever need me I'm there."

"Me too," said Nick as she hugged him. "Um Kassidy?"

"Yeah Nick?"

"Can I come to the wedding tomorrow?"

"I've always wanted you there. Nick where is your luggage?"

"In the cab."

"A cab has been waiting with its meter running this whole time? God Nick, go pay him. Geesh I'll help pay part of it."

"No it's ok I got it," he said as he jogged out of the house.

Nick came back with his bag. Kassidy was turning the couch into a bed for him. He watched her move. He really had missed her. She turned and smiled.

"One bed for you. Sorry we only have two guestrooms. Michael and Grace got those."

"No problem. Thanks for letting me stay. I asked the cab driver to wait earlier, because I wasn't sure if you would let me in the house."

"Nick you're always welcome. Now get some sleep. I need to get some rest so I don't look completely awful in my pictures tomorrow."

"Kassidy you always look beautiful. Night."

"Thanks Nick. Night." She headed down the hallway, but called out over her shoulder, "Carter it's good to have you back."

"Grace & Angel" is a work of fiction.
The characters and events portrayed are fictitious,
and any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental.

Used with Permission
Copyright ©2000
All Rights Reserved
No part of this text may be copied or reprinted
without the author's permission.

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