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Chapter 68
After a couple of minutes it gets quiet. I hear someone behind me entering the kitchen. If it's Dunk, I'm not gonna talk to him!
"Iris," Ant says and gently puts his hand on my shoulder. I turn around at him. He sees that I'm really upset and gives me a hug. I lean my head to his chest and cry my heart out. Ant keeps on rubbing my back and stroking my hair.
"The way dunk said it! Like it's something he just did alone! Like he made me pregnant on purpose! Like he can make it all okay by buying me a house!" I cry.
"I know, I know. It was the most stupid and insensible thing I ever heard him say! It didn't even sound like Dunk!" Ant nods.
"When we were together, he wanted to have children. And now that I'm carrying his baby, he's so d@mned happy about it! Doesn't he understand that I didn't want it? Doesn't he understand that I wanted it to be Lee's baby? Doesn't he see that it hurts Lee?" I cry and cry.
"I think he didn't think or understand anything at all since� since you broke up with him. He was and still is desperate. He felt really guilty about what he did to you. And then he tried to stop the guilty feeling by telling you to live your own life, to become happy without him. But when he found out that you're pregnant from him, he saw that as a sign that there's hope for him. So he wants you back�" Ant says thoughtful.
"But doesn't he even see that that hurts me? I can't choose between him and Lee! Can't he see�" I break down in tears again.
"See what?" Ant asks softly, lifting up my face.
"That I feel guilty! Guilty that I'm not happy I'm gonna have a baby! The only time I felt happy about it, was when I was with Cat and Hez, far away from Dunk and Lee! Who can I blame for the difficult situation I'm in? Dunk? Myself? The baby? It's horrible, even thinking of blaming the baby!" I call out, putting my hands on my belly.
"You don't have to blame anyone. It's nobody's fault," Ant shakes his head.
"But I'm blaming Dunk for it, because of his behaviour! He's so rude and careless! Lee's the one who's caring and understanding to me! He knows exactly how I feel and what I need�"
"Awww sweety! You should stop thinking and worrying that much! Just focus on finishing university, and your baby! Don't worry about others, especially not Dunk. Be selfish this one time! You have every right to be selfish now!" he wipes my tears away.
"I'll try to be selfish," I smile weakly. "Does that mean I can hit Dunk if he ever says something like that again?" I ask, trying to grin.
"I won't stop you! Pregnant women can be dangerous!" he puts his hands in the air laughing.
"Especially the mood swings," I grin.
"Let's go back to the living room, I think Tia needs the kitchen," Ant says, so we go back.
I avoid Dunk's look and smile at Tia that I'm okay.
She stands up and says: "Come on Dunk, we have to make dinner." They leave and I sit down next to Lee, Ant sits on my other side.
"I thought you were gonna help Tia to make dinner?" Sy asks me.
"Nah. Ant told me to be selfish. So if I turn into a lazy bitch, you know who to blame!" I grin.
"Than you need a personal slave," Sy points at Ant. I start grinning evilly.
"I know who you're thinking about as your slave," Lee grins evilly too.
"Dunk's the one who caused it, he said it himself�"
" He really knows what you're thinking!" Ant calls out at me and points at Lee.
"Told you so," I laugh.
"Have you been talking about me?" Lee asks.
"Don't worry mate, she says only good things about you," Ant smiles. Lee gives us a doubtful look.
"He's not joking, not this time," I smile at Lee. He smiles back at me.
I lean against his shoulder, so he has to put his arm around me. At first he's a bit uncomfortable, but after a couple of minutes he relaxes. We're having a good time, Ant's telling funny stories about Emily. And they keep on making jokes about me and my baby. They've really cheered me up!
When I come back from the toilet, I literally bump into Lee in the hallway.
"Sorry," he grins and walks on.
"Lee!" I call him back. He turns around.
"Can I�" I hesitate. He comes back and stands right in front of me.
"What?" he gives me a sweet smile.
"Can I go home with you this evening?"
"And stay the night?" he asks softly.
I nod. "I know it's weird, because� we broke up. But you're the only one I want to spend time with," I say, blushing slightly.
"Yes of course you can come with me. I'm glad you asked it!" he smiles. We give eachother a big hug.
"Tia asked if you can come to the kitchen," Lee says with a hoarse voice and lets go off me. It's a bit dark here, but I think he has tears in his eyes. Poor guy! I give him a kiss on his cheek and go to the kitchen.
"Hi! Can you please make the sauce for me?" Tia asks me.
"Sure," I nod and start with it right away. Dunk's cutting the lettuce at the table, behind me. I hear the kitchen door and turn around. Tia's left me alone with Dunk!
