Cordelia could hear scuffling on the other side of the door. She knew better than to just open the door. She'd grown up in Sunnydale. She knew what was outside after dark. She was anxious to hear from the rest of the group, but she was not about to let something in the house hoping to see them at the door.
She had elected to stay behind with Dawn when Buffy had refused to let her go along. She didn't particularly like to actually fight, but she hated being left behind. She worried when she was left behind, not that she would tell any of them that. But she knew that Buffy, Xander, Spike, Willow and Giles would fight better knowing someone was looking after Dawn.
Cordelia breathed a sigh of relief when she heard a key in the lock and Giles' voice on the other side of the door. She stood back as the door swung open, then immediately rushed forward. "OH MY GOD! XANDER!" she shouted, helping Spike carry Xander's unconscious form into the room. "What happened to him?"
Cordelia helped Spike set him down on the couch, kneeling down next to the vampire. She was shocked at the blood covering him. There were bruises all over his face. Cuts still oozed small trickles of blood. She could see the dried remains of his nosebleed and the trail of dried blood from one of his ears. Blood covered his shirt, as well as tears and dirt.
"We're not exactly sure what happened to him." Angel said, bringing in a damp cloth.
Spike took the cloth, handing it to Cordelia. She started cleaning the dried blood from Xander's face. "Well, why don't you tell us what you know, and maybe we can figure it out?" She said, taking off Xander's shirt while Spike held him up for her.
"Xander? What happened to Xander? What's wrong with him?" Dawn asked from the stairs, wearing her nightgown. She'd come down when she'd heard the shouting. Her lips trembled and her eyes filled with tears when she caught sight of her first crush.
"He's going to be fine Dawn. I promise." Buffy said moving to her sister's side.
"Angel, tell me what happened. Please." Cordelia asked, not taking her attention away from cleaning Xander.
"There were about fifty vampires. We were all fighting like mad, and more just kept coming. Xander shouted to me. The master vampires were doing the spell. He told me to break the circle, to stop the spell. I did and he threw Buffy away from the flash point of the backlash. I could see him. He didn't have time to get away and he was too close. I tried to get to him, but there were too many vampires in the way. He got caught in the backlash. I heard him scream, then everything got really quiet. It was so bright, we couldn't even open our eyes. When we found him, he was dying Cordelia. His heart was stopping. Then he started glowing, and floating. When he stopped, everything was fine. He was unconscious and still had bruises, but the major injuries were just�gone. Like they'd never happened. I've never seen anything like that before." Angel said, pacing as he explained everything.
"Wesley, you've more knowledge of casting than I do. What could have happened in the backlash? What could it have done to Xander?" Giles asked, looking down at the man he thought of as a son.
"I'm not really sure what spell they were using. It depends on where they were in the spell." Wesley said, running his hands through his hair.
"They were at the beginning. I could hear them. They'd already called for blessing from their Gods, Chaos God obviously. They were starting the ritual portion." Angel explained, looking at his friend.
"Well, if the spell was disrupted, as it obviously was, it could have changed the meaning of the spell. The backlash itself contained massive amounts of power. Depending the kind of spell they were using, several things could have happened. It's really hard to tell without a copy of the spell to research." Wesley said, self-disgusted with his inability to help more.
"It's ok Wes." Gunn said, patting his friend on the back.
"Is he going to be ok?" Dawn asked, wiping tears from her eyes, but more just poured down her face.
"We're not sure, Nibblet. We won't know til he wakes up." Spike said, his voice calm as he carded his fingers through Xander's hair.
"Hey, how ya doing? I'm Gunn." Gunn said, kneeling down in front of Dawn.
"Dawn." She replied, shaking his offered hand.
"That friend of yours is something. You should have seen him. He was doin' moves I ain't never seen, and I've seen a lot of moves." Gunn said, making Dawn smile a little. When he saw her smiling towards her friend instead of crying over him, he turned to Buffy. "What's his special deal in this anyway?"
"He doesn't really have one. He just is. He sees something that needs to be done and he just does." Buffy said, pride filling her eyes as she looked at her long time friend
"Laughter" Spike said quietly from his perch.
"What's that Spike?" Giles asked when everyone's attention was focused on him. He never looked up from Xander's face.
"His special deal is laughter. He always makes us laugh. No matter how bad things get, he makes us lighten up and see the bright side of things. It doesn't matter what kind of day he's had or how many people have shit on him that day, he always tries to make our days a little brighter. That's his special deal." Spike elaborated, brushing his hand over Xander's forehead.
"That it is." Giles said standing. "I'm going to fix myself some tea. Could I get anyone else �" Giles voice trailed off at the groan from the couch.
"Xander? Pet, you awake?" Spike asked, leaning closer to the young man.
Xander shifted around, rolling to his side then back again. Mumbling something, he shook his head from side to side. Spike shifted closer trying to hear what he was saying.
"What's he saying Spike?" Buffy asked, moving closer.
"Not sure. Can barely hear him. Something about running. He can't run anymore. He can't get there fast enough. Make any sense to any of you lot?" Spike said looking around the assembled group.
"Not a clue. Can't make it where?" Buffy asked, looking to Willow.
"I'm not sure. He's had nightmares regularly since he was a kid. Maybe that's all it is." Willow said, leaning over the back of the couch to see her friend better.
"Please. Stop. Leave him alone. Get away from him." Xander mumbled shifting again. "Don't. Jesse, don't. Please, just go away." Xander thrashed his head.
"He's having a nightmare about Jesse. When he was turned. He told me he stopped having those." Willow said, her voice catching on the name of her dead friend. Tara wrapped her arms around her from behind, offering her silent comfort.
"Leave him alone. He's not an animal. Get away from him." Xander said a little more forcefully. He began to thrash more violently.
"Xander, come on, Son. Wake up." Giles said, slapping him gently on the face. Xander didn't wake and began to move around more.
"I'll kill you bastards. Leave him alone. I'll kill you if you touch him Riley. I swear to God I'll kill you." Xander said angrily. All eyes turned to Riley who was sitting in a chair in the corner.
Riley raised his eyebrows in shock and confusion. He'd never heard Xander use that much venom. Not directed at him or anyone else. What could he have possibly done to him to make him that angry.
"Xander, it's time to wake up. You've been asleep long enough." Spike said, shaking the boy more forcefully.
"Get away from him. I said LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Xander shouted.
Everyone looked away quickly as a flash of golden light burst from Xander's body. The coffee table began to shake then sailed through the air, straight for Riley. Angel recovered quickly and pushed the ex-commando out of the path of the table, before it smashed into the chair where he'd been sitting, shattering.
Angel stood and helped Riley from the floor. He looked towards Xander and found the boy sobbing into Spikes duster. His Childe was looking back at him, shock and fear evident in his gaze. Everyone else looked between Xander, the shattered table and back again.
"Xander? You ok pet?" Spike asked, looking at the moral boy crying in his arms.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Xander said on a choked breath.
"Xander, what were you dreaming about?" Willow asked, running her hand over his shaking shoulders.
"Jesse, he was there. I tried to get him to leave. I didn't want to kill him. God Willow, I killed my best friend. But he wasn't dead, and the Initiative had him, but it wasn't him. It was Spike. I'm so sorry Spike. I couldn't stop them. I'm so sorry." Xander said, crying softly against the blonde vampire.
"Shh�It's all right, luv. I'm right here. I'm fine. The Initiatives gone. Bloody bastards aren't coming back. Everyone's fine, pet." Spike said, trying to sooth the distraught human. He couldn't believe Xander would be that upset over a dream about him with the Initiative.
"I could see it all Spike. I saw everything they did to you. I saw them put the chip in. I swear I'll kill them all for you. I swear I will." Xander promised, his voice dripping with malice.
"No, luv. That's not you. That's not who you are. Things are probably better this way. I'm fine, Xander. That's not who I want you to be." Spike said, not believing what he was hearing. Xander wanted to kill for him. His mind was officially shutting down.
"Xander?" Riley asked tentatively. "You ok?"
Xander lifted his head from Spike's shoulder and looked at the ex-soldier. He saw the shattered table behind him. "What happened to the table?"
"You broke it, Xan. You got made and shouted. It went fly across the room. You said you were gonna kill Riley and it headed right for him." Buffy said, her voice devoid of emotion, not believing what she'd seen.
"Oh my God. Riley, are you ok? I didn't mean it. I promise I didn't. Oh God. What's happening to me?" Xander asked, fearful eyes gazing around the group.
"I'm fine, Xan. See, nothing to worry about." Riley assured him, laying a hand on his shoulder.
Xander jerked and gasped, his eyes falling shut.
"Pet?" Spike asked, watching the place where Riley's hand was touching the boy. Both the shoulder and the hand were glowing gold.
"I can see it all." Xander's voice came out in a whisper.
"Uh, I can't move my hand." Riley said quietly, his voice a little higher than normal.
"What do you see, Xander?" Wesley asked, walking to stand beside the couch then kneeling down so he could hear.
"I can see you Riley, as a kid. I see the farm where you grew up. I can see your parents. The Initiative. I can see everything. Dr. Walsh, the drugs, the battle against Adam. I can see it all from your point of view. I can FEEL you." Xander said, amazement in his voice. He opened his eyes wide, and sucked in a large gulp of air.
Riley jerked his hand away as the glow left it. "That was�I don't know what that was." Riley said, sounding astounded.
"What's happening to me, Giles? What's going on? Why can I see things like that when people touch me? And why only some people? Why didn't I see anything for you, or Willow, or Cordelia?" Xander asked, his voice nearly hysterical.
Spike began to gently rock the shaking boy, and looked to Giles for answers, as did everyone else in the room.
"I only wish I knew, Xander. But we're going to try to find out." Giles assured him, then got up to get some of his books.