DISCLAIMER: Strange as this may seem, it's the honest truth. Parodies, for some odd reason so dictated by our government, are NOT copyright violations. Trust me, I had to do an entire copyright violations activity my teacher thought up. If I can find the web site she gave us again, I'll post the addy and you can see for yourselves.

That being said, Kaze-chan and Mouse-chan would like to state that they in no way shape or form own any of the following, even though they wish they do and pretend they do! Hey, better safe than sorry ~_~

AUTHORS' NOTES: We suggest that if you don't already know the "Who's On First" skit performed by the great Abbott and Costello first in the 1930s that you go check it out before you see what we, um... did to it ~_~ There's a copy at http://www.geocities.com/lai_nyan/onfirst.html Happy Reading!

Kaze-chan: Ha ha ha! I got to be TASUKI! I got to be irritated and annoyed and dense as a plank! Aww, I know Tasuki-chan is smart. I love Tasuki-chan! ~glomps~ But for the purpose of this humor fic it's kinda difficult to get anything inside his skull ~_~ And I got to say "Rekka SHINEN!" How COOL!

Mouse-chan: Nuri gives me stuff to do when I should be doing other stuff. He's basically my Chief Enabler. But a good one. And he's so kawaii!!! ^_^ Kawaii, kawaii, kawaii... Which sounds like I have major identity issues. Which I don't. Not really, anyway.

Kaze-chan: Are we so sure about that, Mouse-chan? ~_~ Let it be said here and now that I'm a hopeless case on humor fics. I can't write them by myself! So I got Mouse-chan to "help" me by, err, pretending to be Nuri-chan, which she does a lot anyway. And I just played off her for Tasuki. It was fun!

Mouse-chan: "Which she does a lot anyway?!!"

*************************************************************************************

Who's On First - Fushigi Yugi Style
By Kaze-chan and Mouse-chan (Purple Mouse), who are not responsible for the late-night silliness of this fic. Well, maybe they are, but that's beside the point.

Nuriko: Neeeeeee, Tasuki-chan, guess what, guess what!!

Tasuki: What? **irritably**

Nuriko: **jumps up and down** We're going to New York! I'm gonna be a coach for a baseball team, and you're coming with me!!!

Nuriko: Miaka explained the whole thing! We're all set!

Nuriko: ......Well? Aren't you excited??

Nuriko: Ne??

Tasuki: What the hell are you talkin' about?

Tasuki: What's baseball? What's New York?

Nuriko: **sweatdrop** I'm talking about... gahhhh.

Nuriko: You don't know about baseball?

Tasuki: Hell no. What's a coach? And why the hell did they pick you?

Nuriko: **sniffs haughtily** I happen to be very familiar with the game.

Tasuki: Oh yeah? What is it, and why do I have t' go?

Nuriko: You have to go because.... because, well... you'll like it!! You'll really like it, Tasuki-chan!!! New York!! According to Miaka, it's a really great place!! Lots of BARS and stuff.

Nuriko: ....and I need some company

Tasuki: Bars? **perks up**

Nuriko: Hai! Bars!

Tasuki: **snorts** Ferget it.

Tasuki: I'm NOT going t' this "New York" place just t' keep YOU company.

Nuriko: Moooouuuuu, but Tasuki-channnnnnnn....

Tasuki: NAAAA! Ye're whinin' again!

Nuriko: **pouts** It's not just for me!! It'll be fun for you, too!!!!

Tasuki: Ye're whinin'! Stop the torture!

Tasuki: **claps his hands over his ears**

Nuriko: **clears his throat** Okay, now... Baseball. You can't make your decision unless you know about baseball.

Nuriko: It's a game.

Nuriko: People from Miaka's world play it all the time.

Tasuki: **happily can't hear**

Nuriko: OI, TASUKI!!!!! **punches Tasuki into the wall**

Tasuki: **SMACK**

Nuriko: **sweetly** Listen, won't you?

Tasuki: Mouuuuu.....

Tasuki: **dazed** Look at all the li'l birdies....

Nuriko: **sigh**

Nuriko: **nudges Tasuki with foot** Tasuki-chan?

Tasuki: Nuriko? When'd ya get a twin?

Nuriko: Snap out of it.

Tasuki: Snap outta what?

Nuriko: Are you ready to listen to me?

Nuriko: I'm gonna tell you about baseball!

Tasuki: Well, considerin' it's either listen or ye're gonna whine or do THAT again, yeah.

Nuriko: ^_^ Fantastic! I knew you'd see reason.

Tasuki: **mutters** WHAT reason?

Nuriko: Okay, now. Baseball is a game they play in Miaka's world.

Tasuki: A game?

Nuriko: Hai.

Nuriko: A sport.

Tasuki: Sport?

Nuriko: .....

Nuriko: Okay, back to square one.

Tasuki: We never LEFT there, genius. Ye're not doin' a good job. **glares** Anyone else bein' dragged along?

Nuriko: **cheerful** Nope! Just you.

Nuriko: Miaka thought you'd be the best fitted for it.

Tasuki: Moouuuuuuu.

Nuriko: Being sporty, and all.

Tasuki: Why me? WHY ME?! **asks the sky**

Nuriko: Shaddap. Listen, will you?

Tasuki: **reluctantly shuts up**

Nuriko: Okay, so, BASEBALL!! **claps hands together**

Nuriko: What you have is a field shaped like a diamond...

Tasuki: **huffs and pays attention**

Nuriko: **draws field in dirt**

Nuriko: With four bases positioned like THIS...

Nuriko: **draws in bases**

Tasuki: What're bases?

Nuriko: Bases are.... ahhh...

Nuriko: Markers.

Tasuki: Like posts or somethin'?

Nuriko: Hai, except they're flat.

Tasuki: Stupid kinda marker, no one's gonna be able t' find it.

Nuriko: Well, it's not really a problem if the grass is short.

Nuriko: ANYWAY.

Nuriko: They're flat because you need to be able to step on them.

Tasuki: **shaddups before he leaves another imprint in the wall**

Nuriko: Now, there are two teams in baseball.

Nuriko: Each team has nine players on the field.

Nuriko: One team is in the field, and one is batting.

Tasuki: What's batting?

Nuriko: Okay, now we come to batting.

Nuriko: This is a bat. **holds out bat**

Nuriko: Pay attention, or you shall be hit with the bat.

Nuriko: Just kidding.

Tasuki: Ohhhhhhhh! **takes it and grins** That looks like it could do some damage t' Tamahome.

Nuriko: **winces** H-hai. True.

Tasuki: Can I keep it?

Nuriko: Ummmm.... sure, keep it.

Nuriko: And you obviously know what a ball is...

Tasuki: Yes, I'm not THAT dense.

Nuriko: All right. So, the object of the game is to stand at the front plate...which is called "Home"...and hit the ball as far as you can.

Nuriko: There'll be someone else from the other team throwing the ball at you so you can hit it.

Tasuki: Don't sound too hard.

Nuriko: Nope! It's really not!

Tasuki: But what's a plate?

Nuriko: Oh, I'm sorry... the plate is the base. The flat things lying in a diamond shape around the field.

Tasuki: All right.

Nuriko: Okay so far?

Tasuki: Yeah.

Nuriko: Okay.

Tasuki: Okay.

Nuriko: Now. Once you hit the ball, you try to run to the base on your right.

Tasuki: Why?

Nuriko: **patiently** Because that's how you play the game.

Tasuki: Gaaaaahhhh..... things from Miaka's world....

Nuriko: You're trying to run to all the bases and wind up back at "home".

Tasuki: Why'd ya do that if ya just ended up where ya started?

Nuriko: Then you'll score a point for your team.

Tasuki: Ohhhhh!

Tasuki: Ya get points!

Nuriko: Hai!! Points!! **glad for progress**

Nuriko: Okay?

Tasuki: Okay.

Nuriko: Understand everything?

Tasuki: No, but go on, ye're gettin' that look again.

Nuriko: **sweatdrop**

Nuriko: Okay...

Nuriko: So.

Nuriko: When you hit the ball, you try to run to the first base on your right.

Nuriko: BUT, if the other team gets the ball and throws it to the member of their team who's standing on the base, and the guy catches it while standing on the base, the batter is out.

Tasuki: So ya do all that fer nothin'?!

Nuriko: Right.

Tasuki: That's stupid.

Nuriko: No, it's not. It's part of the game.

Nuriko: If the batting team gets three outs, then the other team gets to switch places with them, and THEY get to bat.

Tasuki: **huffs** Y'know, when I was little, we played games that made SENSE.

Nuriko: GAHHHH, this DOES make sense!!!!!!!!!!

Tasuki: Maybe to YOU!

Nuriko: If you'd only PAY ATTENTION!!!!!!

Tasuki: I AM!

Nuriko: All right... I'm not gonna get mad.

Tasuki: And I'm not gonna fry ya.

Nuriko: All you need is practice...

Tasuki: All YOU need is patience.

Nuriko: .......

Nuriko: **decides to ignore him**

Nuriko: Okay.

Tasuki: I don't wanna be smacked int' a wall again.

Nuriko: **teeth clenched** So, when your team is in the FIELD....

Nuriko: There are nine positions.

Nuriko: There's a guy who stands on each of the bases except for home.

Nuriko: ...except the Second Baseman stands kinda in between the bases... HERE **draws in diagram**

Nuriko: Then there's the pitcher, who throws the ball to the batter...

Nuriko: And then there's the catcher, who stands behind "home" and catches the ball when the pitcher throws it.

Nuriko: **draws in those positions**

Tasuki: That actually makes SENSE.

Nuriko: I'm glad you think so.

Tasuki: Catcher, catches, at least they could get SOMETHIN' right.

Nuriko: THEN, there are three guys out way back in the field...

Nuriko: Right field, center field, and left field.

Nuriko: **draws them in**

Nuriko: And then there's the short stop, who's HERE.

Nuriko: **draws it in**

Tasuki: **decides not to ask about the short stop**

Nuriko: **sees that Tasuki's confused about the short stop** This guy's here just because they need support, since the second baseman's all the way over there.

Nuriko: Okay?

Tasuki: Ah.

Nuriko: All right!

Nuriko: So, the goal of the people in the field is to get Outs from the other team.

Tasuki: Okay.

Nuriko: You can do this by...

Nuriko:
1) catching the ball when the batter hits it
2) tagging someone from the other team when they're running from base to base
3) Stepping on the base while holding the ball before the runner gets there
or 4) the pitcher throwing the ball three times without the batter hitting it

Tasuki: **hides the fact that he's sheerly overwhelmed**

Nuriko: **pats him on back** Don't worry, it's a lot easier to understand once you're actually playing it.

Tasuki: **mutters darkly** I freakin' hope so.

Nuriko: It's hard to explain, and I guess I'm not the best person to do it...

Tasuki: Hell no.

Nuriko: When we get to New York and you see everyone playing, you'll pick it up in no time!

Tasuki: Is New York a village?

Nuriko: It's bigger than a village!

Tasuki: Town?

Nuriko: It's bigger than Eiyo, even.

Tasuki: That's BIG.

Nuriko: Hai!

Nuriko: It's like Tokyo!

Nuriko: You remember, with the huge buildings?

Tasuki: That's Miaka's place, na?

Nuriko: Hai! This is like that, but in a different country, across the sea.

Tasuki: Ahhhhhh!

Nuriko: And we're GOING THERE!!! It's gonna be so much fun, Tasuki-chan!

Tasuki: So what the HELL are we gonna DO there?

Tasuki: Aside from get drunk.

Nuriko: Hehhhh...

Nuriko: Well, like I said, we're gonna help coach a baseball team!

Tasuki: The guys who run around and hit the ball and catch the damn thing, right?

Nuriko: Hai!! See? I told you you'd get it!

Tasuki: **doesn't really, but can't stand the explanation again** So who the hell are these guys?

Nuriko: Well, Miaka gave me this list with all the names of the players...

Nuriko: I dunno how she got it **shrugs**

Tasuki: It's Miaka, with her, ya probably don't wanna know.

Tasuki: Prob'ly ate through the damn door t' get it.

Nuriko: **giggles**

Nuriko: So, it looks like we've got a bunch of interesting guys.

Tasuki: Interestin'?

Nuriko: Hai.

Nuriko: Apparently, they enjoy doing ballet warm-ups while practicing...

Nuriko: NANI???

Tasuki: What the HELL?!

Nuriko: Ehehehehe.... **puts papers away quickly** Well, that's not important...

Tasuki: **pulls out his tessen** They need a lesson...

Nuriko: Tasuki... **clicks** They're not here. What exactly are you planning to do with your tessen?

Tasuki: Uhhhhhh..... beat 'em when I see 'em?

Nuriko: If you must.

Tasuki: Good, I must.

Nuriko: So look, you should at least know the positions of the guys before we get there... cuz you ARE going, aren't you??? **endearing grin**

Nuriko: **puppy eyes**

Tasuki: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT! **hides in fear**

Nuriko: **follows him with puppy eyes** NEEEE, Tasuki-channnnnn???

Tasuki: ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! I'll freakin' GO, just STOP THAT!

Nuriko: **smiles happily and glomps** WAI!! I knew you would!!!

Tasuki: GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! GERROF ME GERROF ME! **tries to pry him off with his tessen**

Nuriko: **lets go** Hee hee, you're so weird, Tasuki-chan...

Tasuki: Ye're such a freak sometimes...

Nuriko: **gives him a light punch**

Tasuki: **SMACK**

Nuriko: O.o Ummm, oops...

Nuriko: Gomen nasai.

Tasuki: **glances up dazed from prone position on floor** That freakin' hurts...

Nuriko: **hops over to sit beside him** Okay, so, why don't we go over all these players...

Tasuki: Why not, give me somethin' to concentrate on besides the fact that my entire body is broken...

Nuriko: Here's the list...

Nuriko: Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...

Tasuki: That's what ye're gonna tell me, not the other way round.

Nuriko: No, I TOLD you!! Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third!

Tasuki: No ya didn't! I just asked ya that!

Nuriko: Pay ATTENTION, Tasuki-chan...

Tasuki: I am!

Nuriko: Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third!

Tasuki: I freakin' asked YOU that!

Nuriko: No, I just TOLD you that!!

Tasuki: All right... all right... can we make a deal?

Nuriko: Hai.

Nuriko: That's fair.

Tasuki: I'll try t' control my temper if ya promise not t' HIT me anymore.

Tasuki: Okay?

Nuriko: Okay. Deal. **holds out hand to shake**

Nuriko: **crosses fingers behind back**

Tasuki: **shakes** All right. Now who's on first?

Nuriko: Hai.

Tasuki: I mean tell me his name.

Nuriko: Who.

Tasuki: The first baseman.

Nuriko: Who!

Tasuki: The one ya keep tellin' me is catch...

Nuriko: WHO is on FIRST!!!

Tasuki: I'm asking YOU that!

Nuriko: That's his NAME, Tasuki-chan!!!

Tasuki: That's who's name?

Nuriko: Hai!!

Tasuki: Well freakin' tell me!

Nuriko: I did!!

Nuriko: That's it!

Tasuki: That's who?

Nuriko: Hai.

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: All right, all right, now if I got this straight, and I don't know I do, ya got a guy on that thing ya call first base, na?

Nuriko: Hai. Very good!

Nuriko: You're picking it up.

Nuriko: It's not hard.

Tasuki: **dripping with sarcasm** AriGAto. So who's on it?

Nuriko: Yup!

Tasuki: **groans** Do these guys get paid?

Nuriko: Ahhhhh.... hai, Miaka said something about that.

Nuriko: We don't have to pay them, though.

Tasuki: Good, I'm not pilferin' and stealin' when I'm drinkin'.

Nuriko: We get paid ourselves!

Tasuki: We do?

Nuriko: Hai!

Tasuki: **interested now**

Nuriko: We'll be coaches, and coaches get paid!

Tasuki: YATTA!

Nuriko: ^_^

Tasuki: But back t' the guy on first, who gets THAT money?

Nuriko: Hai! All of it!

Tasuki: All I'm tryin' t' get is the guy's name!

Nuriko: Who.

Tasuki: The guy that gets...

Nuriko: That's it.

Tasuki: Who gets all that money...

Nuriko: Hai, he does! He gets all of it. Sometimes if he's sick his family can come collect it for him, so his wife can come down and...

Tasuki: The guy's married?

Nuriko: Hai!

Tasuki: Damn baka.

Tasuki: He's an idiot.

Nuriko: That doesn't matter, he's only paid to play baseball.

**Long Pause**

Nuriko: It doesn't take a lot of brains.

Nuriko: You could do it quite well.

Nuriko: **innocent smile**

Tasuki: Are ya insinuatin' somethin'?

Nuriko: Oh, no.

Nuriko: Me?.... No.

Tasuki: I don' trust that smile.

Nuriko: What smile??? **innocent eyes**

Tasuki: THAT one.

Nuriko: Am I smiling?

Tasuki: That's close enough.

Tasuki: NOW. Before ya drive me any more crazy, just tell me the guy's name on first!

Nuriko: Who.

Tasuki: The guy.

Nuriko: WHO!!!!

Nuriko: **clicks**

Tasuki: How does he write his name?

Nuriko: That's how he writes it!

Tasuki: Who?

Nuriko: Hai.

**Long Pause**

Nuriko: **sigh**

Tasuki: All I'm tryin' t' find out is what's the guy's name on first base.

Nuriko: No. What's on SECOND base.

Tasuki: Ye're not exactly helpin'.

Nuriko: You WEREN'T paying attention!!

Tasuki: I'm not ASKIN' who's on second!

Nuriko: Who's on FIRST!!!

Nuriko: How many times do we have to go OVER this???

Tasuki: STICK TO ONE BASE!!!!

Nuriko: Well, stop changing the players around!!!

Tasuki: I ain't changin' no one! **pulls out tessen threateningly**

Nuriko: Okay, okay, okay!!! Hey, you promised! We had a deal... keep your temper!

Nuriko: I haven't hit you, have I??

Tasuki: Yet. **calms down somewhat, but keeps tessen handy** I'm only askin' who's the guy on first.

Nuriko: That's right.

Tasuki: Okay.

Nuriko: All right.

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: What's the guy's name on first?

Nuriko: **closes eyes, tries to be patient** NO. What is on second.

Tasuki: I'm not freakin' askin' ya who's on second!

Nuriko: Who's on FIRST.

Tasuki: Hell, I don't know!

Nuriko: He's on third; we're not even TALKING about him.

Tasuki: How'd we get on freakin' THIRD base?!

Nuriko: YOU said his NAME!!

Nuriko: Honestly...

Tasuki: If I said his NAME, then who'd I say is playing third?!

Nuriko: No. Who... is... playing... FIRST.

Tasuki: What's on base?

Nuriko: What's on SECOND.

Tasuki: I don't know!!

Nuriko: He's on THIRD!!!!!!

Tasuki: There I go, back on damn third again!

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: Would ya just stay on third and don't go off it?! **brandishes tessen**

Nuriko: Okay, okay, Tasuki-chan... just tell me what you want to know. Put that thing away, for crying out loud.

Nuriko: I'm not Tamahome.

Tasuki: Hell no. But ye're handy. Now. **through clenched teeth, very slowly** Who's. Playin'. Third.

Nuriko: **hands on hips** Why do you insist on putting Who on third base??

Nuriko: You're so stubborn!!

Tasuki: What the hell am I putting on third?! **nearly raging**

Nuriko: Iya. What is on second.

Tasuki: Ya don't want who on second?

Nuriko: Who's on FIRST!

Tasuki: I don't know!

Both: Third base!

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: **takes seeeeeeveral deep breaths, unwraps his fingers from around the tessen, not realizing he's left imprints** All right. Ya said ya have this thing.... I think it's called the outfield.

Nuriko: That's right. Three players at the back.

Nuriko: Calm dowwwwwn.

Tasuki: And there's... a right fielder, a left fielder, and a..... middle fielder?

Nuriko: Hai.

Tasuki: All right. What's the left fielder's name?

Nuriko: **checks paper** Why.

Tasuki: **narrows eyes** Just thought I'd friggin' ASK ya.

Nuriko: Well, I just thought I'd freakin' TELL ya.

Tasuki: Then tell me who's playing left field!

Nuriko: **shoves paper at Tasuki's face** Who's PLAYING FIRST!!!!

Tasuki: **can't read the strange writing, but certainly does NOT like having things shoved in his face** REKKA-!

Nuriko: OI!!!!!

Nuriko: **kicks Tasuki in the knee**

Tasuki: ITAIIIIII!!!!!!

Nuriko: Put your tessen on the bench!!!!

Tasuki: HELL NO!!

Nuriko: I'm trying CALMLY to explain this to you, and you just wanna flame me!!!

Nuriko: I can't do THIS if you keep doing THAT!!!

Tasuki: Ye're SCREAMIN' IN MY FACE!

Tasuki: And shovin' things in it! That's not CALM!

Nuriko: Mouuuuuuuuuu.....

Tasuki: **echoes sentiment**

Nuriko: I'd be CALMER if your SKULL weren't so thick...

Tasuki: It's not, YE'RE so dense ya can't explain ANYTHIN'.

Nuriko: **throws up arms**

Nuriko: Ack!!!!

Tasuki: Gaaaaahhhhhhh...

Nuriko: **calms self down**

Nuriko: Tasuki-channnnnn....

Tasuki: **attempts to do the same** DON'T say my name that way.

Nuriko: Let's try this again, okay?

Tasuki: Yeah, afore we kill each other.

Nuriko: We'll BOTH be patient...

Nuriko: No punching, NO flaming...

Nuriko: Just two.... CIVILIZED... people.

Tasuki: No TAPPING either.

Nuriko: No tapping.

Tasuki: Good.

Nuriko: No fangs.

Tasuki: Can't do anythin' about that. Ready?

Nuriko: Hai, just hit me with your questions. And no, I do not mean that literally.

Tasuki: All right. What's the name of the guy in left field?

Nuriko: ..........

Nuriko: **REALLY trying to be patient** NO. What is on second.

Tasuki: I'm not ASKIN' ya who's on second.

Nuriko: Who's on FIRST...

Tasuki: I don't know!

Both: Third base!

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: The left fielder's name.

Nuriko: Why.

Tasuki: Because!

Nuriko: Oh! He's center field.

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: Okay, ya said ya had somethin' called a "pitcher" on this team, right?

Nuriko: Hai. The one that throws the ball to the batter.

Tasuki: The pitcher's name?

Nuriko: Ummm....... **checks** Tomorrow.

Tasuki: Nani? Why won't ya tell me today?

Nuriko: **dangerous singsong voice** Baka yo... I'm telling you NOW...

Tasuki: **grins fangily back** Then go right ahead and tell me.

Nuriko: Tomorrow! Ahhh, I said no fangs!!

Tasuki: I never promised no fangs! Okay, if ya don't wanna tell me now, what time?

Nuriko: What time what?

Tasuki: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's freakin' pitchin'?

Nuriko: Now LISTEN, Who is NEVER gonna pitch, because...

Tasuki: I'LL FRY YA IF YA SAY WHO'S ON FIRST!

Nuriko: BUT HE IIIIIIIS ON FIRST!!!!!!!

Tasuki: REKKA SHIIIIIINEN!

Nuriko: **ducks** LIAR!!!!

Nuriko: **catches partial fire in face anyway**

Tasuki: YA WOULD TO!

Nuriko: I would NOT!!!!!

Tasuki: Yes ya WOULD.

Nuriko: I'm not a PYRO!!! **cough cough**

Tasuki: Ya'd smack me into a WALL.

Tasuki: And ALL I FRIGGIN' WANNA KNOW IS WHAT'S THE NAME OF THE GUY PITCHIN'!!

Nuriko: GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Nuriko: What's on SECOND!! SEEEECOND!!!!!!!!!

Tasuki: I DON'T KNOW!

Both: THIRD BASE!!!

**Long Pause**

Nuriko: **pinches sinuses and fixes singed hair**

Tasuki: **takes a veeeeeeeeeeeeeery deep breath and pries his hands off the tessen** The one thin' ya said that made sense was the catcher catches the ball.

Nuriko: **makes affirmative noise, keeps eyes on hands, which he's trying to brush off**

Tasuki: So can ya tell me his name?

Nuriko: Today.

Nuriko: **cough cough**

Nuriko: Gonna hide that thing one day.

Tasuki: Take my tessen and ya die. **smacks him helpfully on the back** Today, and ya say tomorrow's pitching.

Nuriko: **blinks up at him** H-hai! NOW you've got it!

Tasuki: All we got is a coupla days. **bummed out**

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: Okay, so we got the catcher.

Nuriko: Hai.

Tasuki: I'm guessin' he catches the ball if the other guy don't hit it, na?

Nuriko: That's right.

Nuriko: Simple enough, ne?

Tasuki: **shrugs** I guess. Nothin' else is.

Nuriko: **cheerful once again** But you'll learn, Tasuki-chan.

Tasuki: So the catcher is ready to catch, and this guy who hits a lot gets a turn, na?

Nuriko: Hai.

Tasuki: And so the catcher needs to throw the ball to first to get the guy out, na?

Nuriko: Hai!!

Nuriko: **beams**

Tasuki: So he grabs it and throws it t' who?

Nuriko: HAI!! You got it right, Tasuki-chan! Very good! Took ya long enough...

Tasuki: **groans loudly** I don't have a damn idea what I'm sayin'.....

**Long Pause**

Nuriko: Well, that's really all the catcher has to do!

Tasuki: Is throw it t' first.

Nuriko: Hai!

Tasuki: Now who's got it?

Nuriko: Naturally!

**Long Pause**

Tasuki: Look, if the guy throws it t' first, hopefully SOMEONE'S gonna get it.

Tasuki: Now who's got it?

Nuriko: Naturally!

Tasuki: Who?

Nuriko: Naturally!

Tasuki: Naturally?

Nuriko: Naturally!

Tasuki: So he grabs it and throws to Naturally.

Nuriko: **face falls the slightest bit** ... Nnnnnoooo... he throws the ball to WHO.

Tasuki: Naturally.

Nuriko: That's different, though.

Tasuki: That's what I said.

Nuriko: You're not saying it...

Tasuki: He throws the freakin' ball t' Naturally.

Nuriko: No. He throws it to WHO!

Tasuki: Naturally.

Nuriko: That's it.

Tasuki: That's what I said!

Nuriko: You ask ME.

Tasuki: He throws the ball t' WHO?

Nuriko: Naturally!

Tasuki: Yer turn.

Nuriko: You throw the ball to WHO?

Tasuki: Naturally.

Nuriko: **eeps** That's it!!

Nuriko: **claps**

Tasuki: **throws his arms exuberantly in the air** Same as you! Same as FRIGGIN' YOU! He throws the damn ball t' who. Whoever the hell it is drops the damn thing and the guy runs t' second. Who picks up the ball and friggin' throws it t' What. What throws it t' I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back t' Tomorrow, three out. Another guy gets up and hits it t' Because. Why? I don't know! He's on friggin' third and I don't give a damn!

Nuriko: Nani?

Tasuki: I said I don't give a damn!

Nuriko: Ah!!! He's the shortstop.

Tasuki: GAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

Nuriko: **blink blink**

Tasuki: Ye're gonna drive me NUTS!

Nuriko: You already ARE nuts... not much more I could do, I don't think...

Tasuki: **his hands fold around the tessen**

Nuriko: ...Oi! Put that thing down!

Nuriko: Come on, now! We have to go get stuff together... we're leaving soon!

Tasuki: **holds it up threateningly, glaring darkly and angrily at Nuriko** I just got one damn question for ya.

Nuriko: **groans** Look, I'll make you a copy of the list in kanji...

Tasuki: WHAT THE HELL IS BASEBALL?!

Nuriko: **facefault**

Nuriko: **keels over**

Nuriko: **KA-BOOM!!!**

Tasuki: **THUDTHUDTHUDTHUDTHUDTHUDTHUD**

Tasuki: Uggggghhhhhh........

Nuriko: BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA!!! **whales on Tasuki**

*************************************************************************************

Mouse-chan: **pokes Kaze-chan** Hey, do you think they're calling the white-coated men again? Or did we just scare them away?