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Special Rant February 5, 2003

   Readers, you must be wondering why I posted a special rant today, no?  Well, to all of those people who didn't know, stupidity pisses me off.  Like hell.  So, I'll be talking about stupidity at my home after school today.  At dinner, my sister was pulling her usual oh-let's-quiz-each-other-in-the-most-vexatious-ways-ever bullshit again.  She had a riddle for me.  I answered it.  It was the corniest and most absurd riddle I've ever heard from a 5th grader.  Here was her riddle:

   A woman was found on the bed, and she wasn't alive.  Near her was a pair of scissors.  Now, her death did involve the use of scissors, but she had no cuts or bruises, and there was no blood.  How did she die?

   The answer: she had a waterbed; someone cut open the waterbed with the scissors and drowned her in it!  OK.  What the fuck?  My sister needs to cut the wannabe funny crap because it isn't working.  Now, she left out that little detail that the lady would have been wet if she drowned.  Plus, I don't think a waterbed is so deep that you can't lift your head up to breathe.  Shitty, yes.

   Everyone in my family thinks they're all so smart and shit.  They think that just because I've been stumped once or twice by shitty jokes (or if I didn't know the population of say, Sri Lanka) they can laugh and throw it in my face.  Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha...no. 

   My sister has recently had a project on the heart.  So, she decided that since it's due tomorrow, she'll just procrastinate and procrastinate and type it up tonight.  Guess what, dumbass?  The printer is nearly out of black ink!  Unfortunately, there was enough ink for her shitty ass report.  She typed her 3 page report (which consisted of a revision of her terrible rough draft) in a matter of an hour because she sucks at typing and I'm busy doing my own work. 

   I eventually type up her report, with hella inaccurate information.  You can read it here.  I'm not even going to fucking revise it, since you probably can, unless your age consists of only a single digit. 

   Then, she needed a fucking bibliography done.  She complained that it was her first bibliography and didn't know how to do them.  I told her that the only fucking way for her to learn was to do it by her fucking self.  Her damn assignment paper gave perfect examples on every source she needed.  But NO.  She had to fucking cry her ass off, and have me get yelled at by my parents.   Bitch.  Anyway, I did a shitty bibliography for her.  She said thanks, but I knew she wasn't honest, since she had to be reminded.  Bah.  My family is dumb.  Well, there is the special rant.  I hope you enjoyed it.  If you didn't, then fuck you.