The caffeine began to take hold, in that it made her conscious of her mind dipping between beta and delta wave emission, slowing reaction. producing that unique state, that old state. It gave her the jitters, the entertaining skull-throb. Civilization is an inhibitor, a tranquilizer, a sedative meant to suppress the basic desire for happiness. Or that�s what it is now. Initially, it was intended to inhibit the innate selfishness of man. Presently it is a catalyst for the innate selfishness of man. Wait, am I equating selflessness with happiness?" Lem questioned as she imbibed more stimulant. I don�t know, I�ll get back to that later. Licking coffee from corners of mouth. Currently, morality doesn�t comply with our social structure. It doesn�t exist. There is no room for it. What is it to be moral? To give the extra change back? This meaningless gesture is supposed to redeem the soul, differentiate the good person from the bad? Is this what we define the moral, the good person by, by an accumulation of pathetic gutless social gestures, spineless abstractions of the virtues they once represented? Has it come to the point that we have gone to such lengths to prevent ourselves bodily harm that the accumulated insulation (civilization) leaves the danger of us needing to prove whether we are moral out of life? Its hard to justify one�s moral goodness when the one great trial of life is dealing with a complex nexus of trivialities created by and for the continuation of the common jerk. In the dealing, the getting by, the apathy is sown, the desire distracted. Once people realize their death is not immediate there is no need to care about it, to wonder whether it was good or not, to wonder if they should have been good or not. Perpetuating selfishness. In becoming more complex, it all became so stupid.
Zooming past cars characterized by their advertisements, making use of the highway system, lem wished that just once it would all breakdown. That the rebelling robots, the familiar death threat, the post apocalyptic futuristic wasteland would finally come. Whether, in such an atmosphere, her worth as a human would be justified or nullified didn�t matter. It was the circumstance.
She drove, brows knitted, tongue burned, thinking: bring on the bloodthirsty androids, damnit.