Evil Dead III : Army Of Darkness

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After being ejected from the portal ( as seen in Evil Dead II ) Ash and his Delta land with a nasty THUD! (The Delta coming off worse landing on a slope and creaming it.) Ash gets up only to be confronted by a handful of Knight who start saluting him as the ' Hero from the Sky '. While Hailing their new Hero, Two men ride up to greet Ash. One is Wiseman Joe and Lord Arthur. Thinking that Ash is a no-body, he tries to pick a fight with him only to be beaten down and held at Sword point by One Pissed Off Chainsaw maniac. But Arthur has the advantage as he tells him men to take Ash prisioner. Stripped of his shotgun and chainsaw and bound in chains Ash is uncertain of his fate. Wiseman Joe picks up the fallen weapons and examines the chainsaw as the weapon is strange to him ( Duh! It's the 12th Centuary ).
Dragged back to the castle of Kandar, Ash is beaten and kicked aroundt by small children and angry peasents. A stunningly beautiful brunnette named Shiela runs up to Arthur asking about her brother. Arthur informs her that he was killed in battle last night against Duke Henry The Red. Full of hatred for thoses who killed her brother, She sets her eyes upon the slow moving train of slaves. It is poor luck that Shiela spots Ash and begin to beat the crap out of him. The train of slaves stop and all are upbound and await their fate. A voice behind catches Ash's attention and he turns to talk with Duke Henry himself....
' Listen I got news for you pal, you ain't leading but two things Jack & Shit, and Jack left town '
Arthur addresses the group and they are told that death awaits them in the pit. One of Henry's men tries to make a break for it but it nailed to a wooden pillar with compliments of Arthur.
The pit is opened up and another of Henry's men is flung in. After a few moments of scilence a geezer of blood erupts and fills the courtyard. All eyes look around to see who will be next. Unforntuatley they set on Ash. Trying to pled his case that he doesn't Know Henry, Sheila throws a stone and hits him square in the head.
Dazed and confused, Ash staggers up the plank to the top of the pit, and with a little help for a soldier , is kicked in. Landing with a splash and gasping for air, Ash doesn't notice the hand than rises up from the muddy waters behind him. Suddenly a deadite attacks him and starts beating the crap out of him. Our ' hero from the sky ' tries to fight back but is not having much luck. Wiseman Joe makes his way over to his horse and pulls out the chainsaw and shotgun. Making his way over to the pit, he catches the attention of Ash and flings down his chainsaw. Mustering up all his strength, Williams manages to leap up to an incredible height and locks the chainsaw in place. With the engine roaring to life and a sinster look on his face, Ash strikes a pose and waits for the deadite to attack.
Being a Deadite must mean your brain powere drops, as you DO NOT fly towards a pissed off chainsaw weilding maniac. So for its troubles, Ash cuts it up in to with one swipe. . Arthur calls for ' Spikes' and suddenly that's what he gets and the sharp pointy things known as spike slowly come at Ash from both ends
The crowd now cheering for Ash, Sheila looks on with cold hatred in her eyes....

Looking for the quickest way out, Our hero tries to scale the walls, but a second pit deadite emerges and
tries to grab Ash, only to have its hand chopped off and slapping some guy in the face. While beating the hell out of the undead creature, Ash spots the chain conveyer belt than is moving the spikes. Quickly whipping off his belt, Ash lashes it out and uses it as a make shift whip to pull himself out of the pit. Almost making it, The deadite grabs onto his foot causing him to loose grip on his belt. Furiously kicking at its face Ash escapes......barely.
Proving his worth, Ash emerges from the pit. Dirty,stinking and very very very pissed off. Walking over to Arthur. ' You know, your shoelaces are untied ' . Being a primitive Screwhead, Arthur looks down and is sucker punched by Ash.
Still pissed off and looking for a fight, Ash picks on another one of Arthur's men who turns out to be a wimp. Setting Henry and his men free making sure they escape the castle safely pisses off Arthur who challenges Ash to a sword fight and draws out his weapon. Our hero casualy walks over to Wiseman Joe and picks up his shotgun and breaks Arthur's sword in two. After explaining S-mart's top of the line shotgun which can be found in the Sporting goods section, Ash delivers the immortal (and my most memorbal line of this film)
'Shop Smart, Shop S-mart'

Spotting the pit deadite has escaped, Ash blows the hell out of it making sure it stays dead. After twirling the shotgun around his fingers like a cowboy, Ash holsters his weapon and calls for Wiseman Joe to find him away home....

Evil Dead III : Army Of Darkness
( The Directors Version )