Sung to the melody of "Taxman," as performed by The Beatles. This version mangled exclusively by Evel Karaoke.

Let me tell you how it will be
Don't want the hole you use to pee
'cuz I'm an assman, yeah, I'm an assman

No matter if your tits are small
Back here I can't see them at all
'cuz I'm an assman, yeah, I'm an assman

You are sitting on my favorite treat
Your sweet bubble butt just can't be beat
But if you want it spanked—that'd be neat
Then I'll schtup your perfect heart-shaped seat

ASSMAN!

Don't ask me what that lube is for
(ah-ah, gimme K-Y!)
Unless you wanna take some more
(ah-ah, Abolene!)
'cuz I'm an assman, yeah, I'm an assman

And my advice if you are shy
(Assman!)
Just watch your back door 'round this guy
(Assman!)
'cuz I'm an assman, yeah, I'm an assman

And I'll put it in where you can't see

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