Handling the next brief narration from Rei's perspective was done because I wanted to show how Rei has changed. She's acting on her agenda now, not Gendo's. The brutality of the battle picks right back up, unfortunately for Cirus. Camael is rather angry, I think, and so gives no quarter to the black Eva. Re-breaking his arms seemed a clear way of demonstrating that the battle was not quite done yet. Again, this was really done to incite response from Rei. Seeing Unit 00 all but go berserk (well, Ayanami-sama herself all but go berserk) is a very unique scene, and though out of character for series-Ayanami-sama, I think her development to this point allowed it as a valid response in her outrage at Cirus' pain. Even in the first draft, this scene was particularly descriptive, because the point that she was so strenuously determined was important, and best-made through showing her physical actions in detail.
If you're curious what Rei's screaming would actually sound like, then I recommend watching some of the Slayers series. Hayashibara Megumi-sama does Lina Inverse's real voice, too, and Lina is a much more boistrous character, still young. So her shouts and strains will give you a clearer idea.
A minor point of interest. Cirus' real power is his pain tolerance. When he seems too injured to act, he uses his mangled body to unleash vicious attacks. The use of Unit 14's mangled arm to drive the blade straight into the Angel's face is a key example. It is, however, quite straining.
Taking the brutality to a whole new level, Unit 14 gets impaled on Camael's arm. A nasty shock, I think, for the reader, and done so deliberately. Perhaps I'm overestimating my capacity to surprise the reader, but I was hoping to do so at least. This, of course, is the final straw for Rei. It's all too clear that Cirus could die in a heart-beat. The justification for Rei's (not Unit 00's) powerful AT field can be found in Kaworu's death scene from the series. Check it out, and pay attention to what happens to his AT field just before the screen switches to Rei.
The Angel, however, is not going down so easily. Rei just redoubles her effort. I particularly enjoyed writing the destruction of the Angel's arm to her fist. Ayanami-sama can kick some keister when she wants to, oh yes. Camael, like Cirus, has immense pain tolerance, and so simply switche tactics. A suffocating Ayanami is one of the most sympathy-enducing scenes I can imagine, so I use it frequently. It tugs at my own heart-strings, and so makes the writing all the more intense. And, of course, it triggers Cirus' return. The fastest way to anger Cirus is to attack Ayanami-sama, as has already been well established in Kenosis. And yes, Unit 14 does have a progressive knife like Unit 01, it just doesn't use it very often.
The revised description of the Angel's healing arm is one of my favorite sequences now. It just looks cool in my mind, so pardon my enjoyment. And yes, if Rei hadn't cut off the plug-crush when she had, I'm not sure Cirus would survive it.
I knew how I wanted to finish this fight, just not specifically detailed. I wanted Rei and Cirus to work together. Having Cirus break off one arm-blade and having Rei use it came to me on the spot, and it worked perfectly. I think being bisected was a very fitting finish for Camael. Just for drama, like the dastardly writer I am, I wrote the final panic about Unit 00 and Unit 14's destruction, only to relieve the reader by revealing the use of the inviso-AT field.
Having Rei mimic what Shinji and Gendo had done for her was not even a cause of hesitation. I just came to me, and I knew it had to be. Turning the tables on such a familiar sequence for any Eva fan is my biggest signal that Rei is independently quite strong now. Now, of course, everyone knows that moving a badly injured person is a bad idea because broken bones might puncture and cause more bleeding, but I thought preventing blood-loss was the closest justification I could use for dragging him out. He has a rather deep gash down his side.
There's a certain tragic adorability to Rei's "Cirus! Don't leave!" A childish phrase, but with immensely powerful emotion. I love it, especially for its reality. I try, whenever I write a harsh scene, to give some relief at some point, and in this case, it comes with the AT-field shower of light. The battle is finished, much to the relief of everyone (and the reader, I imagine.)
The chapter wraps up with a very important plot revelation through Ritusko and Misato. The times Cirus helped Rei in the past are explained as uses of his AT field. Nearing the end of the original story, I thought it quite appropriate to finally reveal this in detail. Beyond that, however, it serves as an important character-development scene for Ritsuko. I do like Ritsuko, despite how she treated Rei in the past, and am happy to let her grow out of her mistakes. If I ever wrote another Eva fan-fic, I would make a point out of giving Ritsuko a more pleasant life, too. And if you read on, you'll enjoy the chapter that was the original epiloque and prologue of the two separate stories, now combined in Kenosis.