This is the paper I had to write for my MAL class. Anyone from that UAE delegation, I appologise ahead of time for posting online how very much I was offended by all of you. I don't appologise for what I actually said because it's all true. This paper isn't supposed to be serious, so no worries.

My time spent participating in the Model Arab League has been very profitable. It has given me an understanding of the way many world organizations work and how they solve problems (and how they fail to solve them). I have entered the world of bureaucracy (bureaucrazy?)!

Learning to write good resolutions is key to success in bureaucracy. Even if a resolution suggests a valid problem and a viable way to solve it, it can be mercilessly shot down for its faulty mechanics, or its mention of Israel as something other than a Zionist Entity or the Occupying Force in Palestine.

Learning to work within the system is also important � at times even more important than knowing what you are talking about. I think the delegation from the California University (representing the UAE) was a good example of this. Their flagrant disregard for the Arab World as it currently stands angered and troubled me no end. Their resolutions went on for pages about how they practically worshiped the UN. I was much chagrined when no one in the Environmental Committee not affiliated with BYU found this out of character for the United Arab Emirates. Their perambulatory clauses were put together in such a way as to suggest great forethought and research, but the operative clauses themselves were �Total Crap� as one of my fellow Djibouti delegates so eloquently put it, merely restating the problem and suggesting that the Arab League comply with the United Nations regulations. I hardly think that would have gone over very well had it been presented in the real Arab League. Yet the Judges failed to see through the clever ruse. They made the appearance that they knew what they were talking about, when they did not. The last day of committee sessions, I had had about enough, so I made the statement that the Arab League does not need the UN to tell us what to do or how to do it, as we are Arabs, and not members of the Godless West. This statement sadly lacked credibility coming from Djibouti, who receives much in the way of UN support every year. Yet, I felt that even though it was out of character, someone need to say it, and I noticed that Saudi Arabia and Syria with its strong ideology of pan-Arabism were strangely silent on this matter. A fellow committee member representing Algeria remarked that I was �murderous� in my disgust at the UAE�s worshipful attitude towards the UN and their lack of understanding of Arab political systems. That same murderousness I believe lost me a lot of points from the judges, but I was deeply complimented nonetheless. Let�s take away all their UN �crap� and then see how effective they are, I say.

But aside from the UAE delegation�s presence (that name is now hateful to my ears!), I learned to work within the system of Parliamentary Procedure. Being known simply as �Djibouti� seemed natural to me after only an hour in committee session. Similarly, I learned the real names of few of the other delegates. They will always be �Syria� and �Lebanon� and �Libya� to me. It makes me wonder, however, if such a phenomenon is present within the real Arab League as well. How can there be true Arab Unity if none of the delegates actually know who they are dealing with? In the Arab League, do delegates from say, pre-war Iraq and Kuwait talk to each other in socially? I like to imagine that they know each other�s names and ask about how their sons are doing in school, but this would also be contrary to some of the political goals of both countries, so it is probably sadly only something in my imagination.

My experience in the Model Arab League has helped me become more outspoken, for better or for worse. I am one of those poor souls who suffer from stage fright, so 80% of the time there is something insightful a really want to say and I�m just waiting to work up the courage to open my mouth and actually say it. The only way to get over it is to just go ahead go with it. I think the Lebanese, UAE, and Syrian delegations learned to truly hate Djibouti because of some of the things I said, but that quality of assertiveness that I feel like I have gained stood me in good stead when our van went off the road on the way back and we were holding a van conference to decide a suitable course of action. I think I said, �Shut up! He�s on the phone with Dr. Emmett!� several times, which is not something that I say usually. Truthfully, I am not certain whether that was a result of my newfound assertiveness or a vestige of my anger towards the UAE delegation. If I decide before I finish writing this paper I�ll let you know.

I learned a lot from the regional conference, and I hope I�m better prepared for the National Conference in Washington D.C. because of it. I don�t know if I can say that I really had fun, because I kind of feel like I made a lot of enemies, and I felt very insecure about all the resolutions that I brought with me (all ten of them!). I presented one and it was shot down almost immediately. On Thursday night, I actually had nightmares about having a full day of cut-throat debate ahead of me, and when I woke up, my first thought was, �Oh, no, I�m still here.� So no, arguing about the correct terminology to use for Israel is not my idea of a good time. But do I want to do it again in a month? Of course! I was very grateful for the experience and I would love to do it again, if nothing else to show that Djibouti will not be beaten! You can shoot down my resolutions! You can argue I�m not in character! But by gum, I�ll go down fighting! I don�t know if that would be in character either because Djibouti is kind of a wimpy country, but what the heck.

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