1) Throw out all your "inferior" hair brushes. Buy another expensive one with boar bristles. (Or you could buy a normal one and just call it, "The expensive boar bristle hairbrush" when it's really made of plastic. Who will know?)
2) Cut off every inch of damaged hair. (Unless you, like me, hate to part with any of your hair for purely romantic reasons. But on the upside, if you to trim your hair you get that added plus of no split ends)
3) Never brush your hair when its wet. (Never brush your hair when it is long. It won't kill you to brush your hair when it's shoulder length)
4) Never sleep with your hair loose. (Like I said, who will know?)
5) Always sleep on a satin pillow case. (What is this? Sleeping beauty?)
6) Hair Dryers, curling irons and other heat styling tools are evil (I have firmly beleived in this principle since I was three. The upside of this is that if you never use hair dryers regularly, you can use one without feeling guilty on special occasions, such as weddings, proms. Stll, I have come to reguard the noise of the Hair Dryer as the most annoying sound in the world, second only to that of Luke's Whining in Star Wars: A New Hope.).
7) Use a deep conditioning treatment once a week. (Or once every three months. Or never.)
8) If your hair is really long, you must keep it in a braid at all times. (But that defeats the whole purpose of having it! Flaunt it, baby!)
9) Patience. (So true!)
10) Perms and hair dyes are NOT your friend. (I'll say!)
11) Junk food is not your friend. Healthy food = healthy hair. (I'll keep that in mind after I've finished off this round of chocolate covered Baklava)

So, there you have it. How to be a Hair Nazi. Wahoo. I hope you have enjoyed this little presentation. May the force be with you, and goodnight. Home

Last updated 28 November 2003