Wild and Woolly
[reconstructed titles]
1
What subject in history is more
inspiring than our own Great
West, the West through which
fearless pioneers once blazed
the trail - -
2
but now - -
3
In those days - -
4
but today - -
5
The thrilling scenes of those
heroic times - -
6
have given way to - -
7
Has this march of progress
killed all the romance - -
all the thrills? Well, we shall see.
In the meantime let us cross the
continent to the New York home
of Collis J. Hillington, the rail-
road king, who helped to make
the West what it is today.
8
"Ah! That's the life!"
9
"Tell that Comanche Indian
that we are due at the office
in ten minutes."
10
"Come in!"
11
"Hang the office, Judson!
I'm sick of this life!
I want to be out in the West,
where there's room to breathe -
where the blood runs red
in one's veins - and where
a six shooter is a man's
best friend!"
12
"Judson, you wouldn't
last two weeks out there in
God's country."
13
"I don't think I should
like God's country, sir.
New-York is good enough
for me, sir."
14
"Flowers for your sister, sir."
15
"That's the way the effete
easterner woos his woman.
When I find my mate I'll
carry her off with my two
bare arms."
16
Jeff's daily grind begins at the
offices of his dad's railroad.
17
His pet symbol of the West.
18
Only on Sundays is Jeff's
imagination free to turn
New York into the
Wild and Woolly.
19
"Isn't he a nut!"
20
But even in New York
there are places where Jeff's
dreams come true.
21
While Jeff is reveling in
his picture-play West, let us look
for a moment into the affairs
of Bitter Creek, Arizona.
22
Tom Larabee,
the hotel proprietor.
Calvert Carter.
23
Pedro,
the clerk.
Charles Stevens.
24
The hotel-keeper's daughter Nell.
Eileen Percy.
25
Steve Shelby,
a grafting Indian agent.
Sam de Grasse.
26
Steve's "fence" for
selling government supplies stolen
from the Indians.
27
"I sold that last lot
to my cousin in Mexico.
The government will never
spot them there."
28
"Is Nell at home?"
29
"Will you take a little
ride in my car?"
30
"That's the kind of mate
I'm going to have!"
31
It happens that Bitter Creek is near
some rich mining claims, which are
in need of development. A committee
of citizens goes to New York and
succeeds in interesting President
Hillington in building a spur road
to the mines.
32
"Your idea seems reason-
able. I think I shall send my
son, Jeff, out to investigate
the matter."
33
"My son is a bit of a
nut on the West. I think a
trip out there may cure him."
34
"From Arizona!"
35
"Howdy, stranger!"
36
"These gentlemen have a
proposition that interests me.
I want you to go out to
Arizona and investigate it."
37
"I suppose you buckaroos
feel as though you must wear
store clothes in New York."
38
"I bet that makes you
boys homesick."
39
"How'd you like to have
a little snake bite?"
40
"To the rip-roarin',
thunderin', wide-spreadin' West!"
41
"Mr. Hillington, are you
going to send him to Arizona?"
42
"I'll follow you in about week.
I can't show up on the range
without a new outfit."
43
"So longs, pards."
44
"Yip! Yip! Arizona!"
45
"Whoa!"
46
The Committee returns
to Bitter Creek.
47
"We'll get our spur if
Jeff Hillington makes a
favorable report to his dad."
48
"Young Hillington is a nut on
the West. He expects to find
this country the same as it
was in the eighties."
49
"Father, if we want favors
from him, don't you think
we ought to give him what
he's looking for?"
50
Some job for a New York tailor.
51
"I want to look like him."
52
"Let them come. We'll
make one last big clean up
and beat it to Mexico."
53
Off for the Wild and Woolly.
54
Casey, the engineer.
55
"My train goes through
here at ten that night. Let's
put a phoney strong box in
the express car, and pull a
fake hold-up for the kid."
56
"Say, that's a chance for
us to clean up big."
57
"I'll send a bunch of my
Indians to pull off a fake
uprising."
58
Preparations.
59
And so, when our doughty young
hero left the trail at Bitter Creek,
hell was sure a-poppin'.
60
"Are you ready?"
61
"It's too bad you had to come
today, pard, because Wild
Bill Higby, of Dirty Ditch,
is threatenin' trouble."
62
"There's been bad blood
for years between our gang
and the Dirty Ditch outfit,
and we ain't sure what's
goin' to happen."
63
"That's all right pards.
I came prepared."
64
"Wish you'd come last
Thursday, there wasn't a
killin' all day long."
65
"One of Wild Bill's men
just went around the corner
of the station!"
66
"Be careful, that's Red
Eye Dan, and he's lickered up!"
67
"I'll take you to the city,
gal, and make a lady of you."
68
"Now git your gun and git."
69
"We must get his gun
filled with fake bullets, or
there will be trouble."
70
"Take keer of our Nell,
pard, - - she ain't had much
book-larnin' and she's had to
use alkali for face powder,
but her heart's as big as all
outdoors."
71
"I'd 'a gone for him myself,
but I never use my gun on
anything lower than a
rattle-snake."
72
"I may be rough and
western, but I've got a
heart, boy, and you've
touched it."
73
"Front!"
74
"We want to drink your
health, pardner, because you
done noble by our Nell."
75
All the discomforts of home.
76
Fake bullets.
77
Getting down to business.
78
"This spur will make
thousands a year for the road."
79
"If we get it we can clean
out Wild Bill and the Dirty
Ditch outfit."
80
"One of Wild Bill's gang
is headed this way!"
81
"I drink with my left
hand, pard. Savvy?"
82
"There's a train leavin'
here at eight o'clock tonight.
You be on it or I'm a-
gunnin' for you!"
83
"I'm going for a walk.
Tell him it's dangerous,
and see what he does."
84
"I'm worried about our
little Nell."
85
"She's gone out walkin'
alone, and I am a-worryin'
'cause Wild Bill always
said he'd get her."
86
"He ain't like us pard.
We may take our whiskey
straight but we're squar'
with our women. He ain't."
87
"Oh it's you - - I was
a-skeered it was Wild Bill."
88
"Nell's gone out walking
with the nut."
89
"Is everything set for
tonight?"
90
Preparing for the
grand soir�e.
91
"Here comes our little Prairie
Flower with Daredevil Jeff!
Let's give them a rousing
welcome!"
92
"Have your Indians ready
for the uprising as soon as
the 'hold-up' is over."
93
"I've just heard that Wild
Bill is going to stick the
express tonight.
We'll all have to be ready to
join a posse."
94
"Now boys, you go with
Pedro and do exactly as he
says. Whoop 'er up, and
remember everything you
capture is yours!"
95
"You watch every door
of the hotel, and after I get
the girl out, you kill any-
one that tries to follow me.
Savvy?"
96
"They can't hurt you -
their guns are loaded with
fake bullets."
97
"Ladies change!"
98
"Shut up!"
99
"That wasn't on our program!"
100
"They're firing real bullets!"
101
"It's no use! Your bullets
are phoney!"
102
"This whole thing was
planned to give you a good time,
but something has gone wrong."
103
"Was the kidnapping of
Nell part of the joke?"
104
"Is my room above this?"
105
Real bullets!
106
"I go to Reservation -
get more Indians - heap big
pow-wow."
107
"Nell!"
108
"The gang is watching
out in the bushes."
109
"Nell!"
110
"Nell!"
111
"I'll rope him and bring
him in alive!"
112
"Heap fine white squaw
for big chief!"
113
"Call those Indians off -
you can do it."
114
"Then you stay here
until I get back!"
115
"Go down to the parlor
and fire this gun!"
116
"The Indians are coming!
Shoot in the air and
round them up!"
117
The roundup.
118
The conquering hero.
119
"Boy, I don't know whether it's
something you learned at school,
or if you just happened to pick
the right kind of grandfather, but
your equal I've never seen in this
territory, and I've been here since
seventy-six!"
120
"I know I've been a fool, and I've
brought a lot of trouble on you
boys, but there's no great harm
done and I've learned my lesson.
So I guess I'd better go back east
to my dad's office where I belong.
Goodbye."
121
But wait a minute, this will never do!
We can't end a Western romance
without a wedding.
Yet - after they're married,
where shall they live?
For Nell likes the East,
and Jeff likes the West,
so where are the twain to meet?
THE
END
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