1 A summer on Holland's canals leaves a marked impression...but a fall on its ice leaves a scar. 2 Tina, drudge of the Red Mill Tavern, had been "in Dutch" since birth. ... Marion Davies 3 WORK! A trip over a door sill would have been a vacation for Tina. 4 "Come here, Ignatz!" 5 "You're my only friend, Ignatz...don't ever get married and leave me." 6 WILLEM, the Tavern proprietor was a kind man... the mean kind. ... George Seigman 7 "Twice this month I've caught you sitting down, you lazy good-for- nothing!" 8 "I won't have a mouse eating up all my profits!" 9 "Please don't! I'll pay his board out of my wages!" 10 "Such nonsense comes from not having enough work!" 11 "I'm too good...always helping you do more work! Here's a new ironing board!" 12 "They should have sent a book of destructions!" 13 It wasn't the dams but the damsels that had attracted Dennis Wheat to Holland. ... Owen Moore 14 Caesar Rinkle -- His valet -- ... Snitz Edwards 15 "You have nobody to skate with...and so have I." 16 "I'd be crazy to skate with you...but I know Caesar will be crazier." 17 "Come on! Up the canal we'll skate together down." 18 "Good! I'll skate up and you skate down!" 19 "Careful! Don't tickle me on the curves." 20 "I hope you're all going in the skating race. I'm to judge it....and kiss the winner." 21 "Maybe from the Inn I can bring you a light out." 22 "What good is a light out? I've got a lighter out already." 23 "My name's Tina." 24 "Mine's Wheat! Wheat- Tina! We ought to get together for breakfast!" 25 "I'll bet you've skated home from many an ice boat ride." 26 "Don't let me keep you up." 27 "Why didn't you tell me you were going into a tail spin?" 28 "The trouble with you is .... you don't wear your skates in the right place." 29 "I've got to go! They're starting the race!" 30 "You're certainly keeping a stiff upper lip." 31 "I won! From you I get a kiss ... no?" 32 "As soon as I get an ice-pick I'll kiss you." 33 Tina had been kissed but twice in her life .... once on her cheek and once on her Sunday School picnic. 34 "From you isn't there something coming to me?" 35 Then Spring came .... pushing the ice out of the canals and up into the ice-boxes. 36 And in Spring all Holland's she-s lightly turn to thoughts of he-s. 37 "It would be better if you had your tail on the other end!" 38 "Who wants a drink of milk?" 39 "He's taking Hans to the Haunted Mill!" 40 "May the devil and ghosts come and get you...you Spitzboop!" 41 "Get Tina! She'll save Hans!" 42 "Grab her by the bucket!" 43 "Willem locked Hans in the Haunted Mill! The ghosts will eat him up!" 44 "Help! The devil's got hold of my tail!" 45 "Help! Momma! Poppa! Peter! Jacop! Herman! Uncle LOOO-OO-O-IE!!!" 46 "Ghosts don't scare me... otherwise I'd go!" 47 Two things brought Dennis back to Holland....a train and a boat. 48 "You'll like Holland now. In winter it's much better in summer." 49 "So cute you look ... just like my little dachshund." 50 "So the Burgomaster's daughter has the rooms across the court? Is she married?" 51 "She is ... but she ain't. Her father is making her marry the Governor, and I am helping." 52 "That's Gretchen! The Burgo- master is keeping her locked up until comes her wedding day .... the little trouble- maker!" 53 "She's got a beautiful chassis!" 54 "Never mind the chassis! Wait till you see what she's got under the hood!" 55 The Burgomaster's daughter loved Capt. Jacop Van Goop ..... which proves love is blind in Holland. ... Karl Dane 56 "Will you take this note to Gretchen for me?" 57 "Jacop, I know just how poor Gretchen feels. Once I was in love, too." 58 "Dennis was crazy over me. When we skated together side-by-each he got all upset." 59 "I'll never forget how he begged me to kiss him." 60 "It was so sad. The day he left he cried all over his departure." 61 "Dennis used to love me just like Jacop loves you ... only worse." 62 "Nobody could love anybody so worse as I love Jacop." 63 "We'll change clothes ... then when I sneak out to meet Jacop it will be you!" 64 "Sure you can do it! Anybody could do any- thing that I could think of!" 65 "What a nice pen-wiper you'd make." 66 "If you stood on your head you'd look like an artichoke." 67 "It's easier to peel an onion!" 68 "Maybe that will keep you from sitting down so much!" 69 "Jacop, I'm a lucky girl to be loved by such a handsome man as you." 70 "My little glow-worm!" 71 "It's my Dennis!" 72 "What was it...a piano?" 73 "Caesar....at last you've used your head." 74 "May I come over?" 75 "If you won't come closer to me ... then I'll come closer to you." 76 "I'd like to shake the hand of the mother who raised a beautiful thing like you." 77 "I must have been blind when I was here last winter....not to have met you." 78 "You're like a beautiful ray of sunshine stand- ing there sunburning me." 79 "I never believed in love at first sight until I took a second look at you." 80 "I knew I could kiss .... but not that good." 81 "Just as my Jacop was beginning to commence a mouse jumped in my shoe!" 82 "Drink to the Burgomaster ... and to the marriage of his daughter, Gretchen!" 83 "The day Gretchen marries she will get her Grand- father's estate of a million guilders!" 84 "I've just heard that the Burgomaster's daughter is worth a million!" 85 "Even if she had twenty million, I'd still love her!" 86 "And she's the most beautiful girl in the world, too!" 87 "If she's the most beautiful girl in the world....it's a helluva world!" 88 "My little Jacop.... I've dislocated him somewhere." 89 "Maybe you're looking where he ain't. I'll look where he is." 90 "She has the sweetest face I've ever seen! My little Juliet!" 91 "She might have had a sweet face once....but it's all curdled now!" 92 "With a face like that she needs a million!" 93 "Her lips are as sweet as virgin cherries that follow springtime blossoms!" 94 "The stars are dimmed when my Gretchen's eyes twinkle." 95 "How she could kiss! I could tell her lips from all others in the world!" 96 "BABY!" 97 "POPPA!" 98 "Take a look at your Juliet now!" 99 "I'll ruin that Romeo! Give me something to knock him over with!" 100 "Always something happens just when my little Jacop begins to commence." 101 "I'm through! There's too much traffic on your ladder!" 102 "Don't be mad, Dennis. He's only a relative of mine." 103 "It's you I love....only you." 104 "Not now! Tomorrow night!" 105 "Caesar, you'd better learn to walk with a bouquet. I think you're going to be a bridesmaid." 106 The next morning arrived ... everybody was too busy to stop it. 107 "Start the wedding break- fast! The Burgomaster orders Gretchen to marry the Governor immediately!" 108 "There goes the last chance for my boss." 109 "Well...he owes so many bills, and Gretchen was so rich." 110 "Do you mean he was going to marry Gretchen only for her money?" 111 "Say, when a girl's as homely as Gretchen, Cupid can't shoot arrows....he's got to throw pocketbooks!" 112 "OOo! If only I could call you in English what I'm thinking in Dutch!" 113 "You'll do as I say! In half an hour you'll be the wife of the Governor!" 114 "Oh, Tina....please save me!" 115 "Our instructions are that you take the bride in your boat...so you'd better have this for her protection." 116 "Say....her face is her protection!" 117 "All right! Remember, I'm to follow you in a separate boat." 118 "Go on, Ignatz...act like a mouse." 119 "Help! Police! Murder! Fire...MICE!!" 120 "Wake up, Gretchen! We'll get you to Jacop's boat." 121 "The bride has been stolen!" 122 "There's your little Juliet!" 123 "You must be twins! No one man could be so dumb!" 124 "What a fine groom you are!" 125 "We've lost all trace of your daughter .... but we're still on her trail!" 126 "Ten thousand guilders for information that will lead to her return." 127 "What have you done with Gretchen?" 128 "I won't tell you!" 129 "Keep after Tina ... and that Irisher!" 130 "I'm going to lock you in the Haunted Mill!" 131 "I'll make you loosen your tongue!" 132 "You go one way and I'll go the other." 133 "I'm shot in the shoulder!" 134 "Your shoulder looks all right to me." 135 "Maybe it was the other shoulder." 136 "-- and I'm going to take you back with me and make you an Irish Princess." 137 "Now .... probably by next year I'll have to be a nurse girl!" The EndHome