Emerging Courageous Online Magazine - Stories
Healing Journeys by Cynthia Victoria Lynn
I guess it would be best to start with the story about the horse that became God’s inspiration for me. About this time last year, my daughter and I were asked to work with a beautiful, black Tennessee Walker, named Charmer, so his owner could sell him. His owner hadn’t been able to give him any time for about two years. He was a good natured, playful horse that just needed regular, gentle discipline. His owner soon asked if I wanted to buy him. I was unemployed at the time and couldn’t justify owning a horse. So I declined.
A few weeks later my daughter went to the stable where the horse was being boarded to work with him and came home very upset. She was informed by the stable owners that another trainer was working with Charmer. What upset my daughter the most was the condition she found Charmer in that day. The lovable horse we once knew shied away from my daughter’s hand as she reached to pet him as if she was going to strike at him. He had marks on his rump, and a good size wounded on the knee of one of his front legs.
I called his owner. She explained that the stable owners had convinced her to change trainers. His owner thought about it a while and asked me if I would buy Charmer if she cut his price in half. I prayed about it and prayed about, asking God why a horse was being brought into my life when I knew I couldn’t afford one. I had given up horses once in my life to save my children from an abusive father. I knew I couldn’t go through that pain again. I had just accepted a position serving a church. So I followed my heart and agreed to buy Charmer if I could pay for him in installments. But I kept asking God why a horse was being brought into my life. Finally it came to me that I was to create a program that uses the horse to teach others about God, our relationship with God, and with each other.
Soon after I bought Charmer I went to the bank to take out some money to purchase some of the basic horse care items. It was then that I discovered my husband had spent all the money I had saved and then some. I had to borrow $500 just to be able to pay bills and buy groceries. When I confronted my husband about this, he eventually admitted that he said that it was his money and he could spend it if he wanted to and that he had purposefully sabotaged anything we had agreed to through the years to help our marriage whether through counseling or not. I was mortified. My whole life suddenly felt turned upside down.
As soon as I had saved enough money to move out, I did. My daughter and I found a house in the country where we could keep our horses. We moved the first of January and I filed for divorce on the thirty-first of January. Through the process of the divorce and moving, it became crystal clear to me that God was calling me to open an interfaith spiritual life center with healing as its focus. This gave birth to the now incorporated Healing Journeys Spiritual Life Center, Inc.
I had originally planned to purchase the handy-man special of a home I had moved to and fix it up. But God seems to have other plans. Once I had put the board of directors for the Center together, the treasurer of the board (also Vice President of a local bank) brought my attention to another property. The minute I saw it I knew it would be perfect for the Spiritual Life Center. It sits on a little under thirteen acres. It has a beautiful, immaculate home with equally as beautiful, immaculate grounds. There is a pond with a small island that can be reached by paddle boat, a large indoor arena, barn, pastures (yes I still plan to offer equine assisted spiritual direction and equine assisted therapy), walking/riding trails, is surrounded by woods, and has a creek that runs around one side of the property, and such a feeling of God’s peace. It’s hard to leave once there.
While this was all going on, my now ex-husband experienced a complete spiritual transformation that was spawned at an Emmaus Walk. Everyone comments about his transformation. It took me some time to realize that his transformation is real. I see him as an example of what God can do when we are willing to give our pain over to God. I have prayed several healing prayers over animals and witnessed almost instantaneous healing. They want to let go of their suffering. But with people it is different. We tend to want to hang on to our pains and make them part of our identity. Since our God does not force anything on us, we can get in the way of God’s healing touch. Anyway, my ex-husband and I are now in the process of re-creating our relationship. God is so good.
Back to Healing Journeys Spiritual Life Center. I do believe that it is God’s desire for this Center to manifest. I am part of a small group ministry that just started at the church that I belong to. I led the devotion for our first meeting. I lit a candle for the devotion. As soon as I finished the prayer, the candle went out. We then shared our stories for about the next hour and a half. I shared last. As I was sharing about my calling to open a spiritual life center, the candle re-lit itself. We all stopped in mid conversation and said. “Oh…hello God.” Right now the biggest hurtle to making the Center manifest is acquiring the needed up front monies. The bank says I need to be able to front $100,000 to make it happen. It will definitely be a miracle if that money becomes available. But I believe that if it is God’s will, somehow the money will come.
One last aside story. When the article was written about me last year, my name was Vicki Davidson. When considering what to do about my name in regards to the divorce, I couldn’t come to terms with any of the last names I have had throughout my life. In early March – I think – I had asked to start sharing my experiences and understanding of spiritual healing with the church I serve. So I met with the Deaconate Committee about this. A couple of days later, I learned that one of the ladies in attendance at that meeting was frantically trying to reach me. When I called her, she explained that the night of the meeting she had a dream about me. In the dream we met and she said “Hi Vicki!” She explained that in the dream, I matter of factly responded, “My name is Cynthia.”
She said she couldn’t get the dream off her mind the next day so she prayed about it. Through prayer it was made apparent that she was to tell me of her dream. So she did. At first I thought the whole thing a bit odd. But like her I couldn’t get it off my mind. So I went to our local Carpenter’s Son store to look up the meaning of Cynthia. The name card read that Cynthia means “bringer of light.” As I read these words, I got that warm tingly feeling all over that I get when something is definitely of God. I had my name legally changed. And last weekend had a service of consecration of name and self to God to finalize the transition. My name now is Cynthia Victoria Lynn. It means “bringer of light victorious & flowing brook.” I believe that the symbolism of my new name is directly related to my calling. I don’t know what this will mean for my future, but I gladly offer myself to God in trust.
God’s peace and blessings to you J
Cynthia Victoria Lynn
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