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| She knew she had to tell Chase she couldn�t love him. She knew even though it would break his heart, she had to do it. She had to follow her heart this time. It was time to look out for number one. Number one was Regan, and this time she didn�t want to submit to anyone else but herself.
Chase walked up to her that Monday at school and greeted her with a warm kiss on the cheek. �Hey good looking.� She smiled warmly and didn�t say anything else. He noticed that she didn�t say anything and knew something was wrong. He brushed it off for the time being and didn�t say much more. �You want to um, go out tonight?� he asked, still hesitating to ask. Now he was even more nervous about asking her out. He didn�t want to make it seem like all he was going after now was her� well, body. She didn�t know what to do. She had to tell him what she needed to, and she was hoping that maybe they could get out and go somewhere mutual so she could blurt it all out. She didn�t want to go out, as in Chase�s version of out. Chase loved the dinner, movie, walk around version of a date. She wanted mostly the last part. And she was also afraid to tell him what she had to tell him; for fear that it meant the end of her and Chase. She did love Chase, she really did. But she could never fall in love with him, and she knew that now. She wanted to be with him, but if he was too heartbroken over what she had to say, there was no helping anyone. �Hello?� Regan snapped her head up and looked him square in the eye. �Yes. I would like to go out with you tonight Chase. But on one condition.� �Yeah?� he asked, his eyes twinkling in anticipation. She couldn�t look at him. The look in his eyes said way too much right there. �Can I pick where we go and what we do?� He couldn�t stop smiling. Whatever she had planned had to have been good. �Go for it babe. I�m at your disposal.� Even though that comment could have been taken a million different ways, she knew she had to smile at his childlike enthusiasm over a simple date of her choosing. �Thank you dear.� Chase could only look at her with all the love in the world. He did really love her, and was very scared sometimes that she didn�t want to love him back. He knew deep down that she did, but he wasn�t sure if she could. She had been burned so badly before that it wasn�t going to be a very easy recovery. In the process of over a year it hadn�t. He worried about it, but he never said much to her. He always later he say it, because if she wanted to, she�d open up in an instant. She kissed his cheek, tightened the grip she had on her backpack, and walked away. He watched her until she was out of his eyesight. He sighed, turned to his locker, and spun the COM. There was something undeniably special about that girl. He didn�t know how she didn�t see it every single time she looked in the mirror, but he saw it. And he saw it in everything she did. Regan sat down in her seat in third hour and sighed heavily. She set her stuff down and put her head on her desk. It was going to be a long night. She had to face the fact that it could have been the end of her and Chase. She didn�t want to let him go, but if he was too heart broken to ever see her again, that was what she had to accept. She was going through so much; she didn�t know what to do anymore. She didn�t want to put up with her math class today, and she definitely did not want to listen to Mr. Goodrow ramble on about it. But soon after, Piper joined her. She walked into the class, sat down next to her and said calmly, �Hey girl, what�s going on?� Regan didn�t answer, she was in such deep thought. She didn�t want to lose Chase, but her heart knew what she had to do. She had to tell him the truth before it got out of hand. �Regan? Earth to Regan�� Piper said once Regan hadn�t looked up to say hi or greet her in anyway. Regan finally broke out of her trance to look up at Piper. �Oh hey girl! Sorry I didn�t see you there!� �Who�re ya thinking about?� she inquired, settling herself in her seat. �Oh no one, just the usual,� Regan answered. �I am so sure,� Piper said, rolling her eyes. She knew Regan all too well. She had known the girl since she was in second grade and Regan was in third. Piper was extremely understanding, and very patient with her best friend. She knew Regan well enough to know that all it took was some gentle persisting and a lot of patient to get what was wrong out of her. She knew how to work it, and that was the quality everyone loved about Piper. She was enormously talented as well; Piper had been born equipped with an amazing singing voice. One everyone envied quite a bit. She had even gotten her own song written and recorded onto a CD. All her friends knew her song Believing, by heart. Even though Piper knew she had that much, and knew how to use it, singing was not her passion. She hadn�t truly discovered her passion yet, so singing was more of a hobby than it was a career. Piper also had a quirky sense of humor to go along with her singing voice. She made the most sarcastic comments every now and then, and told the dirtiest jokes anyone had ever heard of. Out of all the people in that group, Piper definitely had to be the dirtiest when it came to whatever. Piper would say what everyone was thinking but was too tactful not to say. Not that it was a bad thing, in fact, that quality about Piper was very endearing coming from her. Piper was only five foot four, with long dark red hair that hung past her shoulder in waves. Her slate gray eyes moved about her surroundings and twinkled with excitement and lust for life. She had full passionate lips that aided to her singing, and made her look even more desirable. Piper was a wonderful girl, and all her friends knew it. Especially Regan. �It�s Chase huh?� she said, just guessing, but truthfully knowing. Regan nodded. She didn�t need to say much more, because Piper could read everything Regan was thinking on her face. The bell rang and the class began. Piper pulled out a piece of paper and quickly jotted a note to Regan. She slid it across her desk nonchalantly, and Regan opened it up curiously. Reggie- Would what you�re so stressed over have to do with what you guys did this weekend? *Wink wink* You never did tell any of us what happened, only Trevor. He�s walking around gloating about it. Tell me, I�m your BFF, you know you can trust me! If you don�t want me to tell, I won�t tell. What�s up girlie? -Pippie Regan smiled, pulling out her pen and writing her back. She slid the note back over to Piper and Piper opened it up to read it. Pippie- Well, I will tell you what happened, I just prefer not to do it in a note in math class when it�s very possible that we could get caught and Goodrow might read it aloud to the class. That�s the last thing I need. I am just having some trouble dealing with something that I have to tell Chase about. It could very possibly mean the end of us, and I am really stressing over it. But my heart is telling me to tell him, and I can�t ignore it right? Help! -Reggie Piper sympathized with her friend. She knew from the get go that Regan was going to have trouble with Chase. Even she saw it radiating out of Reggie that she was still very much in love with Evan. She didn�t even need to say it, it was obvious. Her getting involved with Chase only a few months after Evan hadn�t been one of her smarter moves. She saw Chase fall for Regan, but she always knew Regan wouldn�t be able to fall in love with Chase as easily. It was not something she could pretend with for long and now it was surfacing. She wrote her back and handed it to her when Goodrow turned around to write something on the board. Reggie- Is what you guys did what I think it is? Have Bailey and Trevor already been through it as well if you get my drift? Because if it is, woman you got some serious �splaining to do! Not telling your best friends! But anyway, what do you have to tell Chase? Is it what I think it might be? -Pippie Regan sighed when she read the note and knew that Piper had caught on. Piper was not a stupid girl, especially not when it came to reading Regan like a book. She wrote her back and coughed loudly. Pippie- It might possibly have been what Bailey and Trevor did. I�ll tell you after class or something. Well, I think you know what I have to tell Chase. It�s what you�ve warned me about all along. I�m not in love with Chase, no matter how much I try and convince myself I am. He told me that he�s in love with me, but I realized that no matter how hard I try, I can never truly be in love with him. My heart, in some weird, twisted way, still belongs with Evan. No matter how bad that sounds. I thought doing what Chase and I did would signify that I was ready to open up and fall in love with Chase, but no matter how hard I try, my heart is fighting for me not to fall for him. My heart knows way to well that Chase is not the one. I just don�t want to break Chase�s heart, and I don�t want to lose him. -Reggie Regan handed it back, and while Piper read it, her eyes widened. They had done what she thought, and the problem with Regan at the moment was exactly what she had predicted. She wrote back, a little more forcefully this time, and with a lot more emotion than before. Hey! Regan Nichole Stanbury, how dare you not tell your best friends about what happened! You know none of us would never ever tell about you and Chase! I had a feeling that was what it was about, but I wasn�t sure. Chase isn�t going to take it in the best way, but he�s definitely not going to cut off all communication with you. I just can�t believe you did what you did without telling us or me even! Wow! -Piper Regan sighed when she read it and decided this was the last time to write her back. She had had enough pressure and scolding for one period. Piper- The reason I didn�t tell you guys was because I kind of wanted it to be private. I didn�t want everyone knowing about Chase and me, and I certainly didn�t want you guys thinking we were a couple again or anything. I knew what you guys were going to say, so I didn�t say anything in return. Kind of upset me a little bit when it happened, and Trevor seemed to understand. Are you sure he won�t not want to talk to me ever again? I just have this undying fear that I will lose him� for good. Anyway, talk to me after class, Woodrow�s giving us the LOOK! Love ya! -Regan Regan gave it to Piper and smiled at her meekly. She knew Piper would definitely understand. And she did. Once she read the note, she smiled and nodded at her, letting her know she understood. She tucked the note away in her book and from then on they focused on math. Or pretended to. Neither of them was thinking about their math at all. Piper�s head was still reeling from what Regan had told her, and Regan�s head was spinning, thinking about what she had to do after school, and the possibility of losing Chase plagued her like she couldn�t believe. Once the bell for fourth hour rang, Regan jumped up and walked as quickly as possible out of the class. She didn�t make it though. Piper caught up to her, grabbed her arm and looked her straight in the eye. �Woman you have got some serious talking to do.� Regan looked up uneasily. Her fourth hour was journalism, and since she was an editor this year, being before the bell was kind of an expectation. �What is it babe?� �You know perfectly well what it is. I want to know what you meant in that note. Did you and Chase�� she paused before widening her eyes a tad more. �Do it?� Regan sighed, and knew she wasn�t going to get out this easily. �I�ll tell all of you guys at lunch today, okay? I promise.� Piper didn�t want to let her get away that easily. But she eventually loosened the grip on her arm, and allowed Regan to walk away. �You are getting a lashing from all of us at lunch okay?� Regan smiled reluctantly at her. �I will definitely tell you. I�m preparing myself for it right now.� Piper smiled back, let go of her arm, and watched her walk down the hallway. �That girl is too much within herself,� Piper whispered to herself. �She needs to open up to someone before all of it turns into something dangerous.� Regan stopped during fourth hour to discover she couldn�t concentrate one bit. Chase was all she could think about. |