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| �Do you have your robes on yet?�
Sirius looked down thoughtfully as he stared at his reflection in the bathroom. He couldn�t open his mouth to reply, even if he wanted to. The scarlet and black graduation gown hung on him awkwardly, as if it didn�t want to stay on. In truth, he didn�t want it to be on. He didn�t want to be leaving Hogwarts. It seemed almost too surreal. �Yeah, they�re on.� �Well, come on then! Remus and Peter are already ready and Lily�s meeting us in the common room.� Sirius rolled his eyes. James and Lily. Lily and James. They were now Hogwart�s most inseparable pair. Sirius thought back to fifth year and laughed heartily at how much things had changed. Then again, things had changed quite a bit since Valentine�s Day as well. What Cassie had said that day tore his heart out. He felt as though he�d never be able to feel anything again. An uncomfortable numbness spread throughout his entire body. He couldn�t even feel his legs carrying him back to school. He was glad that the full moon was only a few days away from that fateful night. He needed to get out and do something, to get his mind off of the agonizing pain. James, Peter, and Remus seemed to sense that he was in turmoil and spoke nothing of it. Lily, however, did not forget so easily. She saw the look on his face as soon as he entered the common room that night, but spoke nothing of it until the next day. �Why would she say such a thing?� Lily asked after hearing the story. �She� I guess� she�s been hurt before, and she doesn�t want it to happen again. I told her I�d never hurt her� but it didn�t matter. She said I�m not worth it. I must not be.� Lily sighed heavily, putting her hand comfortingly on Sirius� shoulder. �She was lying, Sirius. Didn�t you see it in her eyes? You are worth it and she knows it. Was she even looking at you?� Sirius frowned, looking up at his friend and trying to figure out how she seemed to know. �No, she wasn�t. She was crying before she looked down and told me no.� �She lied to you then.� �Well, what am I supposed to do now? Go tell her that I know she was lying?� �Oh no. You can�t expect to win a girl�s heart by running up to her and calling her a liar.� Sirius attempted a smile, but it was a measly effort. She was trying to lighten the situation, but unfortunately, it wasn�t going to work. �Give it a few days, maybe even a week. Go back to her and tell her that you don�t want to lose her. She�ll understand. Maybe, in time, she�ll realize that you�re not just going to run away whenever there�s a problem. You�ve got to let her know that you�re just going to keep coming back. You won�t break her heart and leave her.� Sirius took every single word Lily said straight to heart, and followed her words of wisdom. A week later, during their next Defense Against the Dark Arts class, he sat himself down beside her as if it were any ordinary day. She looked up at him inquisitively, but said nothing until the end of class. He walked with her down the hallway in silence, before she finally stopped and demanded, �Why are you still here?� He turned toward her and frowned. �Um� do you not want me to be?� She looked up at him cautiously and then smiled. Her smile brought that same joy to his bleeding heart. He sighed in elation and walked closer to her. They both knew what truly lingered in the air, what was there wasn�t going to just disappear, and they both knew it. Yet what they also both knew was that if they severed such a wonderful friendship, they�d both be completely unhappy without one another. It was going to grow, and they couldn�t deny it for long. Their friendship continued throughout the year as if nothing had touched it. Sometimes, when they got too close, they�d remember. Sirius would never forget how right his lips felt against hers, and Cassie would never be able to forget the sweet feeling she got after kissing someone so gentle and loving. She�d forgotten how to be kissed like that. And things had continued on as normally. Now it was time to graduate. Hogwarts was soon going to be a memory. How could he live without seeing Cassie every day? What good would he have to look forward to? Then he suddenly thought of it. He was going to try to tell her, one more time that he felt more for her than friendship. Maybe this time she would understand that he wasn�t going to just run away from her. He was going to keep trying until he got the response he knew she wanted to give. Not sure whether to be looking forward to graduation or dreading it, he fixed his scarlet tie and readjusted the three pins he�d been given. One from each of his friends. It was a Hogwarts tradition for everyone to make graduation pins for their friends and significant others. It was usually a project they completed after they took their N.E.W.T.S. James popped his head in, his black hair shamefully disheveled, his oval glasses askew on his face. He fixed them before narrowing his hazel eyes at his friend. �Are you about done in here?� Sirius fixed his tie once again and sighed heavily. �About.� �Well, hurry up. Everyone�s waiting downstairs. Lily says she has a pin for you.� Sirius looked up at James and blinked a couple of times. �She did what now?� James smirked. �She made you a pin, you dolt. It�s a friendship one so don�t start getting ideas. She�s my girl, after all,� he added with a look of extreme superiority. �Oh, don�t worry. I won�t �get ideas about your girl,� James,� Sirius said while rolling his eyes. James ducked back out and Sirius stared at his reflection. It was said that if you received more than five pins on your day of graduation, you had done quite well at Hogwarts. Yet, four wasn�t bad either. He opened the door to the bathroom, checking to see that James had left, which he had. He walked over to his nightstand and pulled out the one thing he had not packed. It was a pin he had made just a few days before. It was for Cassie. It was Ravenclaw blue, as all her others had to have been. Except, where Sirius� all said, �Good Dog,� �Most Spirited Marauder,� and �Greatest Home-Made Brother,� Cassie�s said, �The Girl Who�s Worth It.� It might have seemed corny to the other Marauders (except probably James, whose pin for Lily said, �Most Beautiful Green Eyes in the World,�) and that was the exact reason he kept it hidden. He stared at in awe before James pounded one more time on the door. He followed the sound out gingerly, staring at the room that had housed him for seven years. It was going to feel so empty without the little creak in the floorboard, the cold windowsill, and the hole in his four-poster. Life wouldn�t be the same. After they�d all met up in the common room and Lily had given Sirius his pin (which read �My Tamed Black Puppy.� Of course, none of the Marauders truly understood the joke, but Sirius wore the pin with a kind of pride and affection toward the giver) they made their way to the Great Hall. The rest of the students were to watch as the class of 1977 left Hogwarts officially. There was complete madness in the Hall. The Heads of House were all screaming to their students to come over. McGonagall was donning a scarlet robe in place of her usual emerald green one, and was wearing what looked to be three hundred pins. She was as frazzled as she ever was, but composed all at the same time. Only McGonagall, thought Sirius wryly. Through the madness, Sirius made sure to keep a sharp eye open for Cassie. He slowly followed his friends toward their side of the Hall, keeping his head above the crowd all the while. He couldn�t spot Cassie anywhere, as the Ravenclaws were on the other side of the Hall. This figures, he thought bitterly. Maybe I can talk to her afterward. She needs this pin. It was just then that someone grabbed his robes, making it impossible for him to walk any further. He turned to see who was prohibiting his movement, and saw it was none other than the same person he�d been looking for. She was absolutely stunning in her robes. The dark blue of the Ravenclaw graduation tunic set off her eyes in the most stunning way. The boys all had to wear ties with their tunics, as the girls wore a bow. Her bronze bow glimmered wonderfully, and she had done her hair especially for the occasion. It usually graced the middle of her back in shimmering waves. Cassie had pulled it up into a gorgeous ensemble of curls that fell down and framed her face. She wore six pins, four from her friends and two from teachers. �Sirius, before this started, I wanted to�� He stopped her before she could speak any more. He took her hand tentatively in his, opened her fingers, and placed his pin in her hand. He clasped her fingers back around it, brought her hand up to his mouth, and kissed it gently. �Good luck, Cassiopeia. If what is on this pin doesn�t tell you what I feel for you in stronger, bolder terms, than I don�t know what else to say.� Cassie stared at him for a few more seconds and then looked at the pin in her hand. Her mouth dropped slightly and tears filled her eyes. �Sirius� I-� Sirius placed his hands on her cheeks. He bent his forehead down onto hers and closed his eyes. �It�s so true, Cassie. You�re worth everything to me. I would chase after you until you understood. I�m not going to just forget.� Cassie�s cheeks flooded and she lifted her head up off of Sirius�. He gently wiped the tears away with his thumb and smiled tenderly at her. �All right then, Cass? Ready to graduate?� She shook her head. �Not yet. Not until I give you this,� she reached into his hand this time and mimicked him. She closed his fingers around her pin and stared into his eyes. �Mine means what it says, as well. I just� I want to let you in, but there�s� too much hurt. I don�t want to be left.� �Cassie-� �Sh,� she said. Then she did something so unexpected it took Sirius a few moments to process it. She closed her eyes, and stood up on tiptoe, and placed a soft kiss on Sirius� unsuspecting lips. She then turned and fled. Sirius was so taken by surprise that he forgot about the pin in his hand and wandered dazedly over toward the Gryffindor students. James asked him where he had been, and let the matter rest when Sirius replied, �Behind.� They were then instructed to sit, and just as he had done so, he remembered the pin in his hand. He opened up his fingers and saw the scarlet pin with gold lettering staring him plainly in the face. The message read, �Everything to Me.� It took him a couple of seconds before his eyes were no longer blurred with tears that he could put the pin on his tunic. He placed this pin the closest to his heart, knowing for sure that it was where it was meant to be. Safe and warm. Throughout the course of the ceremony, all he could think about was Cassiopeia and how much he was going to miss her wonderful, smiling face. How was he going to be able to keep her in his life? How could he do it? The Ravenclaws were right before the Gryffindors as they accepted their honors from Hogwarts. Sirius watched with rapt attention. Cassie was finally called and he couldn�t help but notice as she walked up, that she had rearranged her pins in order to accommodate his right next to her heart. |