Lesson No. 1: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them . . .
Addendum: . . . Except in the mercenary business. No one seems normal there.
The first thing I thought I should do on my own was make some connections to get myself set up in business. I figured I could start by teaming up with someone. Bad idea. I ended up working with a guy named Jarek. Not the smartest guy ever. I was smart in comparison, if you can believe that.
He was a big guy, a really big guy, and he had an affinity for mean looking knives and postage stamps. I still wonder what that was about.
We were an odd team. Kind of like George and Lennie. Though, honestly, I think he only took me along so the enemy would have someone else to shoot at. We only did a couple of jobs together, then I decided maybe solo would be best. I guess I�m just not the teamwork type of guy. Anyway, get used as a diversion without permission once and you don�t really cherish the relationship quite so much anymore.
From there I got one or two jobs on my own directly from a client. A really pretty lady, actually. She was no Anastasia, but I was beyond that. It had been a two months and I was on with my life . . . Yeah, I�m a liar too. But it worked out pretty well. She needed some hired muscle and I needed a job. She was bored, I was trying to forget someone. It worked. For a while.
Lesson No. 2: There is always one more imbecile than you counted on . . .
Addendum: . . . Namely, you.
You know, as good as I thought that arrangement started out, I guess it was just doomed from the start. Husbands do put a kink in things, believe it or not. Oddly enough, we got along pretty well to start with. He found me not long after I started working with her. I went back to my apartment one night after a job and there he was, sitting in the living room.
�She�s set you up pretty well, hasn�t she?� He said, twirling a cane.
Now, I do know a think or two every now and then. For example, I knew that cane was a sword cane and I knew I didn�t really want to make a husband with a weapon angry at me. �I haven�t botched a job yet,� I replied simply. �Want a drink?�
He smirked and accepted my offer. I sat across from him as he sipped it. �So you�re the new man in charge of . . . security?�
�Something like that,� I replied.
He nodded thoughtfully. �Would you like some extra jobs?�
�From you?� I raised an eyebrow. He nodded once again and I shrugged, seemingly indifferent. �Why not?�
�Good.� He put down the beer bottle and stood. �Here is your first,� and he held out an envelope.
So, starting that day, I was working for two employers. Two employers who, married or not, had some conflicting interests, I learned.
People are always giving you advice, like never get involved in a land war in Asia or never play leapfrog with a unicorn. I would like to add my own to that list: never get involved in a feud between a husband and a wife . . . especially if you�re having an affair with the wife. Not a smart move.
Oh, it worked well enough for a while. With pretty generous paychecks coming in from both of them, I thought I had a pretty good deal. Not that I took advantage of it. I buried Anna�s picture at the bottom of a box and spent my time drinking and having my fling and tossing my money God knows where. I suppose it might have been fun, but it was also completely empty, and, as they say, all good things (or not so good things) must come to an end. Or, when the husband finally clues in. I�ll spare you the details. Let�s just say it was a stupid mistake on my part and luckily I had just enough dumb luck to scrape out of the situation alive.
Lesson No. 3: We are born naked, wet, and hungry, then things get worse . . .
Addendum: . . . And worse, and worse, and worse. It�s a snowball effect, really.
Jobs were a little hard to find after that. I really regretted that I hadn�t saved my money in the time following. I ended up finding odd jobs here and there, but it was a little tough. Here I was, broke and miserable, and I didn�t even have someone to distract me from thoughts of Anna.
It was one of those moments in life when you stop, step back and take a look at yourself and say, �What the hell are you doing here?�
A little contemplation highlights all of your mistakes and makes you start to wonder how to fix them. When you realize how futile all that is, a little beer makes you forget the question in the first place. And no matter how many times I thought about it, I never really did anything about it.
I did keep looking for jobs, however, and actually found one eventually. A job no one else was stupid enough to take. It didn�t occur to me that it might be healthy to find out why that was. I was broke, I needed something to do, and I had nothing to lose, so I accepted the hit every other sane person had turned down.
It wasn�t easy, exactly, but it certainly wasn�t hard enough to keep the others away. It was a thought that bothered me, but what could I do about it?
Lesson No. 4: Don�t trifle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup . . .
Addendum: . . . But if you have a choice between making a dragon mad or making a Seidyrian mad, chose the dragon.
There wasn�t much to it, really. I learned the guy�s routine (what routine there was) and I ambushed him one night. Nothing unusual. I collected my money and I thought I had landed a pretty good job. Well, with the exception of one little detail. You see, the thing that I hadn�t asked about, and that no one had bothered to tell me, was that this fellow had a relationship of some sort with a Seidyrian. That would have been useful to know.
As it was, I didn�t even think about it. I do remember that it was right about the time Anna had Adrien and Alistair. Not being the best mathematician in the world, and not really wanting to see the truth and feel even more guilty, I just jumped to some stupid conclusions about those kids.
So, it�s really no wonder that I decided to put some of that money to good use at the bar. Being drunk and angry at Anna, myself, and the world in general didn�t exactly help my judgement any. When a beautiful Seidyrian woman offered to buy me another beer, I certainly didn�t protest. What the hell did I care? I was moving on with my life. Moving on with my life was pretty nice too. At least until the morning after.
I woke up with a God awful hangover, thinking that it would be nice if someone just lobbed my head off and put me out of my misery. I almost got my wish. If I had stayed asleep I would have. But I woke up just in time to dodge a sword. I wasn�t quite so lucky the next time she swung that thing at me. She was a lot quicker than I was, and a lot less hung over, I�d imagine, and she gave me a pretty good sized gash on my side. I finally got to my weapon then.
If you�ve never fought a Seidyrian, I would advise you not to, not even on a good day. There�s no way I should have lived through it. I almost didn�t. I don�t know what you�d call it, luck or divine providence, but it was on my side, whatever it was, and I managed to at least render her unconscious long enough to get out of there, almost intact.