I had never noticed before how Josh rarely looked up during class, and when he had to, he squinted. But it was done so quickly and sneakily, if I hadn't been making an effort to watch him, I'd never have noticed. I also now realized why he always sat with his back to where he was expecting anyone to arrive from, he'd done it the first time we met in McDonald's, when anyone else would be looking out the window. This way, you had to approach him. He had a whole bunch of coping strategies like this. I had to hand it to him, I had no idea he couldn't see very well. No idea at all.
We met when school finished, and I took him to a nearby optometrist with a huge sign outside that advertised their services - that he had no idea was there. I did all the talking for him, while he shfited uncomfortably like a little kid.
"He's having problems at school and also needs to take his driver's test."
We hung around about 15 minutes and then went in. It was all rather weird and interesting, but it didn't take long, and then the doctor asked him,
"How on earth have you managed Josh? I don't remember the last time anyone came to me for the very first time, getting this high a prescription. How the hell do you cross the street?"
Josh just shrugged and looked really sheepish. The doc continued.
"Well, you don't need me to tell you that you need glasses. You've probably needed them for a number of years, when did you first notice you couldn't see properly"
Now he looked like he was in pain.
"When I was about 11 or 12 I guess."
The doctor shook his head, and started to laugh. But then he became serious again.
"What about your parents Josh? Haven't they said anything?"
"There's just my Mom, and she's.......well, she's....there are better mothers......."
I exchanged a look with the doc. He turned back to Josh.
"Do yourself a favor son, take this prescription straight to the one-hour place in the mall. Are you OK for money? You can pay my bill later if you need to."
A kindness you don't see every day. I assured the doctor it was OK, I had it covered. So we left and went straight to the mall. I had a very quiet boyfriend beside me on that journey.
"What's the problem Josh?" I asked him, "You should be relieved, it's going to make everything so much easier for you."
"I know, stupid huh?"
What could I say? Yes, it seemed pretty stupid, but that wasn't the right answer. So I said nothing, and drove on.
He handed over his prescription without a word. The lady was kind, I guess she'd done this with a thousand young guys, and she asked him very quietly if he'd given any thought about what frames he might like. She knew the answer. We all did. He'd given it about as much thought as learning to knit. So she offered a few to him, but he didn't really show any interest, and then, in a flash of inspiration, she took a proper look at the prescription, put her arm across his shoulders and moved him much closer to the mirror.
He seemed terribly uncomfortable, like he wanted to run. I gripped his hand tight, and offered my honest, calm opinion on each pair, too dark, too big, too square, although none of them looked bad on him. His high cheekbones and dark eyes made them all work. In the end he said,
"You choose."
So I did. I picked out what I liked, and he went with it. We were told it would take a little bit more than an hour, so we wandered off. Hand in hand as usual. Of course now I figured out the reason for that, but I hoped it wouldn't end once he could see properly.
I watched him in the mall, as it now dawned on me that the little world of his own that he lived in wasn't lack of attention. His willingness just to wander, which most guys hate, the fact that he never watched other girls, or got distracted by TV's in windows, that could all change. I was a little nervous myself. I think it was the longest hour of my life. We grabbed a bite to eat, and eventually the time came round, so we walked back.
The kind lady sat him down and put his new glasses on him, checking the fit. To begin with he just sat impassively, but eventually he looked up at me and grinned. He still seemed uncomfortable, but there was something else, which kept a smile on his face.
"Now," said the kind lady "It's going to be a little bit strange to begin with, because the floor is going to behave differently, OK? But you'll soon get used to them. Just take it easy honey."
Satisfied she'd made them as comfortable as possible, she took his money and left us for another customer.
We stepped outside. He was still smiling. For a long time he just looked at me, then looked around. I mean, for a long time. Like he was taking in a new world. Then eventually, smiling even more, he said,
"This is so cool."
Yes, it was cool to see him so relieved, and I was happy for him, but now I had problems just getting him to follow me, he was enjoying the mall, of all places. He was being a tourist. Having just wandered around it for an hour we now had to spend another hour while Josh looked at everything. It was quite touching really. Eventually of course we had to leave, but not before we were spotted by Lisa, who we both knew from school. At first she almost walked straight past, but then she saw me, did a double-take and looked up at Josh.
"WOW!" She said, "I didn't recognize you, I've never seen you in glasses before, how long have you had them?"
"Not long enough" he replied awkwardly. Yep, he'd missed so much. And now he was going to have to go through this with everyone we knew.
"Well," she said "They really suit you!"
"Do they?" he asked me, after she'd gone, "Really? Or was she just being nice?"
"They really suit you," I told him sincerely, "I really like them."
That huge smile came back. Then he found the last $10 he owned in his pocket and said,
"Let's go see a movie."
Part Three
