Chris Joslin:
Toungue Twister Jigsaw
Pedro Angel Garcia
Matt Hune
Chris Joslin
Elayni Garcia (NA)
Pedro Angel Garcia: "CANTABRICA and other poems.
Matt Hune: selected poems
NO SELECTION AVAILABLE
Elayni Garcia: Lions in a House of Memories
NO SELECTIONS AVAILABLE
Scene
A bear cage. Four chairs. On one chair is a phone.
Under another is a 900 Paged File.
LIGHTS UP. Starting center is JACK, years old. Standing behind him
is JILL. Jack looks tense while Jill waits for him to do something,
a plastic grin plastered on her face to cover her anger. Jack�s tone
is scatter minded and neurotic, Jill�s tone is melodramatic and fake.
Jack
I'm starting to lose it - what time is it?
Jill
It's�Eleven fifty-five.
Jack
Yeah, I'm definitely starting to lose it.
Jill
Lose what?
Jack
At eight o'clock every morning, and I'm supposed to take my meds again at twelve,
or right after I have lunch, right?
Jill
Right...
Jack
But if I never get any lunch I MUST take it at twelve. I'm losing the vibe... It's going.
I feel it fading.
Jill
What happens when it fades?
Jack
I get real tired, and unfocused, and just pretty miserable. Like I haven't slept in days.
And if I sit in one place for too long, then I'll fade away. I'll pass out right there.
Jill
Well, why can't you take it now? Don't you keep any on you? You didn�t lose them did you?
Jack
I think someone stole them.
Jill
Stole them?!?! Who could have, or even would have stolen your medication?
Jack
Carson. I think it was Carson. He's always stealing everyone's stuff. He stole your stuff,
remember? In fourth grade he stole your trapper keeper and then he burned it behind that K-Mart.
Remember that?
Jill
Yeah, I do remember that. He does steal. He probably stole your medication. But what
would he want with your medication?
Jack
I don't know. Really, I have no clue. But he definitely stole my medication.
Jill
We should call the police.
Jack
Carson is the police, remember?
Jill
No he's not - he's a zookeeper - a bear hugger. He plays with bears and gets them happy before
people come to the zoo. Carson is a nice guy. Very playful. But he stole your medication,
and I really think we should call the police.
Jack
I don't wanna call the police. I don't wanna do anything right now.
Jill
Of course you want to call the police. The police are nice. Very playful. You'll like them,
I swear. They'll help you find your medication.
Jack
I�m pretty sure Carson�s a cop. Are you sure he�s a bear hugger?
Jill
Positive. At least he was a week ago.
Jack
(Challenging her) Well maybe he isn't anymore. Maybe he retired the day you saw him,
and then went to a police academy where he was given intense training and quickly
graduated and is now a cop cause you know I think he is a cop. And man, you know,
I dunno, I really don't wanna call the cops. I really, really don't wanna call them.
So let's not even consider it, okay? Let's just not even think about it.
Pause.
Jill
Well what then?
Jack
Let's talk about something else. Let's talk about the flu.
Jill
The flu?
Jack
(Scrambled) The flu isn't as safe as we think it is. I think the flu could be the
death of the world. What if everyone got the flu? What if the doctors got the flu first,
all the doctors, and they couldn't help the people who were sick, and so the people
who were already sick would get sicker and sicker, and everyone would be sick, and everyone would die.
Even people who had little sicknesses. Like a cold, or the chicken pox. What if an alien came to Earth and
just injected everyone with the flu? It's as easy as that. It could happen.
Pause. Jill searches for a response.
Jill
I suppose it could...
Jack
I bet it does.
Jill
Well if it does, it won�t happen for a long time. So don�t even think about it, sweetie.
Think about me, about us. Think about the endless and unbreakable love that we share for each other.
Jack
I do think about that. That�s all I ever think of. But my medication...
Jack is speechless.
Jill
Jack?
Jack
(Like a puppy dog) Yeah, Jill?
In pure melodrama, Jill takes a breath and �prepares� herself for'
the
news she is about to give Jack.
Jill
I called the cops. I called them ten minutes ago. See,
I knew you lost your medicine. But I knew you wouldn't let me call them if I asked
you, so I just went ahead and called them. You're not angry are you?
Jack panics.
Jack
(Whining) But Jill� That's not� When are they coming?
Jill
They're a minute late.
Jack
Well can we call them, and stop them from coming? (goes for the phone)
I really don't think it's a good idea that they're coming. I really, really
don't think calling them was a good idea.
Jack offers the phone too Jill.
Jill
But Jack, they love you. They love me. They love everyone, and they�re playful,
that's why I called them. Because they love, and they know what it's
like to be people like us. To be
unloved.
Jack
(Almost angry)We're in love Jill. Me and you are in love.
Jill
(Trying to calm him down) Yes we are Jack, you're right - but who loves us? Huh?
Who is playful with us? Who is nice with us? Who makes us happy before the people
come to see us? No one Jack, no one.
Jill hangs up the phone and puts it down.
Jack
They love me?
Jill
And they love me; they love both of us.
Jack
That doesn't make any sense Jill, I've never even met the police.
How could they love me if they've never met me?
Jill
Because Jack, the police are God's best friends. They play with God and sit at his side
and watch him watch the people down here on Earth. God watches us. You know he does.
And if God watches us, then the police watch us, 'cause they're right there at his side,
looking down at us. You and I, Jack and Jill. And they see how in love we are, and they
wanna love us, 'cause we're in love with each other. And they know we need help.
You need help. You need to find your medication, Jack. You need to. Cause if you don't,
then you'll be gone. And damn it Jack I want you to stay right here. With me. Forever.
Suspicious, Jack circles Jill in the same way that an animal circles
its prey before
attacking. He touches her, sniffs her,
investigates every inch of her body.
He stops and looks at her
with worrisome eyes.
Jack
Are you lying to me?
There's a knock on the door. Jack freaks out.
Jill
That's probably them. (Baby talking him) Look, why would I lie to you? Huh? I could never
lie to you! You're my beautiful boy, my playful, playful super nice boy�
I would never lie to you.
Knock, knock.
Jill
Well� We have no choice now.
Jill walks to the door. Jill answers the door. Sure enough, it's a
police officer, and
oddly enough, that officer is Carson. He's
dressed in a suit and tie, a dark trench
coat, and a big bright
police badge. Carson and Jill exchange subtle glances of
primal
sexuality. Now the game really begins...
Jack
Carson?
Carson
(Playing tough) That's right, Detective Carson, do we know each other?
Jack
What do you mean "do we know each other?" It�s me, Jack, you�re a... bear hugger?
Carson
I'm afraid not sir� I don�t know you.
Jill
You don�t know him Jack.
Carson gives Jill a "hello" smile. Another sexual innuendo.
Carson
Can I come in?
Jill
Yes officer, please, do come in.
Carson
Thank you.
Carson walks into the room. Still playing tough, Carson investigates
the room like
a TV detective. He ends up in Jack�s face.
Carson
(To Jack) I'm assuming you're Jack?
Jack
Stop playing games - what is this? Is this some kind of act? A practical joke?
Carson
(To Jill) Is something wrong with him?
Jill
Well, no, he just thinks you're his friend Carson, he does things like this all the time.
The Carson he�s thinking of, is the man whom he suspects stole his pills.
Carson
My name is Carson, but I'm absolutely positive we don't know each other. Is this going to-
Jill (Cont�d)
be a problem? Because I'm not so sure I can do my work if-
Jack
(Cutting Carson off) Jill, that's Carson, that is Carson, can't you see that's Carson?
(To Carson) You stole my medication! Yeah, you don�t wanna give it back either, that�s
why you�re acting like this huh? All weird and such. Acting like you don�t know me...
Jill grabs a hold of Jack and looks him directly in the eyes,
hypnotizing him.
Jill
Jack! Listen to me! It just turned twelve o'clock five minutes ago. Your
medication has worn off. Your medication has worn off�You�re starting to lose it!
That is not Carson, I swear to you, okay? Do you understand me?
Jack
(Giving into her word, yet still conflicted) Yes. I do.
She turns him around so that he is facing Carson. Jack is very, very
confused as to what is going on.
Jill
This is detective Carson. He's here to help us find your medication.
Carson
When was the last time you had the medication on you? What was going on,
was there a lot happening?
Jack
Let's see, the last time I remember having the pills on me, I was� I was taking one.
This morning around eight, I had just gotten out of the shower, and I was preparing to go
to work, when I took one. Then, I put the bottle in my pocket and finished getting ready.
Carson
Now, you say your friend Carson might have stolen the pills? When was the last time you saw him?
Jack
(Confused) Well I...
Jill
(Playing Jack) Around nine. About the time you got to work. He gave you a big hug.
Remember? He had just declared to the whole building that he was getting married.
We were all very excited. (Wickedly smiling at Carson) Marriage isn�t exactly
something the company is often exposed too...
Carson
What kind of hug was it?
Jack
Well� how do you mean?
Carson
Was it a small hug? A big hug?
Jill
A bear hug. He was getting married -
Carson
Damn happy about it too.
Jill
And playful, he was very, very playful.
Carson
(Smiling) Yes very playful... (Going back to the investigation) Can you recall your
friend's hands going near your pockets, specifically the pocket where you had put your medication?
Jack
No... But you see Detective, Carson steals things. He's always stolen things. In fourth
grade he stole Jill's trapper keeper-
Jill
(Heavily sexual) -And then he burned it behind a K-Mart.
Carson
(Even more sexual) How savage� And this is the only person you've had physical contact with all day?
Jack
Well, except for you and Jill, yes.
Carson's eyes widen, he looks at Jill.
Carson
Did you come in contact with this man?
Jill
Well, yes of course. I hug him and kiss him. We're in love you see.
Carson
Yes, I know you're in love...
Carson gives Jill the look of �get ready to be dominated by my sexual
wrath.�
Carson
I'm gonna have to search you. Could you please put your hands on the wall and spread your legs.
Jack
Search her? Is that absolutely necessary?
Carson
Of course it is absolutely necessary. She came in contact with you, therefore I must search her.
Jack
Don't be silly detective, she didn't steal them�
Carson
Don't be silly!!!???
Carson stops in his tracks, he is very angry, and ready to demolish.
He is no longer
playing games, he is himself, he has slipped
over the edge.
Carson
You don't know the smallest thing about silly. (Advancing toward Jack) Silly is actually a
euphemism for animalistic. Did you know that? Yeah, I bet you didn't. Because you're ignorant.
And ignorance gets you no where but no where. Ignorance gets you thrown in a cage,
where your only contact with breathing life comes when you must be toyed and
tampered with by a large grizzly bear! I could bite you right now. I could bite
your little head off if I wanted to, make blood shoot from your mangled neck.
But I'm not going to. Because I need to find your medication. Because you need your
medication, and I need to get paid, and raise my family, and walk my dogs, and hug my bears
and smile before the camera. The silly, silly, silly, camera� Please try to say
the word "playful" instead of silly. It's a much more loving word.
Carson looks back at Jill.
Carson
Now, please, spread your legs so that I can search you�
Jill puts her hands against the wall and spreads her legs wide.
Carson begins to search her. He feels her up, enjoying the curves of
her body, groping her legs and buttocks, letting his anger and
sexual drive dance together. Finally he finds a medication vial
in one of her pockets.
Carson
(Holding the vial high in the air) What's this?
Jill
Oh that? Well...
Jill breaks free from her act. An evil smile takes the place of the
plastic one.
Jill
That�s exactly what it looks like...
Carson opens the vial and pulls out the medication�s
ingredients.
Jack
Wait a second. I don�t... What�s going on here?
Carson
(Reading) Your lover is Jill Fisher. She has been your lover for two years now. You love her
dearly as she loves you. She keeps you working all day, as she has done in the past. And remember,
you love her. You love her today and you loved you yesterday. You give her a hug and kiss every
morning when you see her at work. In the fourth grade your co-worker Carson stole her trapper
keeper from her and burned it behind a K-Mart. This angers you, but it pushes you to love
her more. You feel sorry for her. You have always felt sorry
for her and always will feel sorry for her in same way that she feels
sorry for you and the fact that you sorry for each other is ultimately the reason why you
love each other. Continue to feel sorry for her. And continue to make her feel sorry for you,
as sorry as possible. Sorry beyond the most extreme levels of sorrow. It is important that this
sorrow power your love for one another and in effect, the labor you put into the work you do for us.
Report all missing medication to Carson. Have a nice day from the Pharmacy.
Pause. Jack tries to understand what�s going on. Carson, smiling,
gently kisses the vial. Jill has a wicked smile on her face.
Jack
You don't love me...
Jill
I don't love you.
Jack
You don't love me? You don't love me!?!? I'm not your little boy? I'm not your playful little boy?!?!
Jill
I'm sorry Jack, I'm so sorry! It's complicated you see-
Jack
Do you know me? Do you know who I am?
Jill
Yes I do. And I really loved you once. But people change, Jack. Sometimes they change for the best,
and sometimes they change for the worst. And we can�t deny things changing for
the worst. It�s just the way it is. Fate shows no mercy.
She quickly grabs the thick 900 Paged File. She returns to Jack, the
file in her hands open for him to grab.
Jill
I want you to have this. Page by page I put this together for you. It�s my life. It�s nine-hundred
pages long, the last hundred and fifty of which contain our history as lovers. So
maybe, in a couple years when you've forgotten about me, you can look at it and smile.
Jack stares at Jill with eyes of sadness. Without warning, he yanks
the file from her hands. He opens the file and begins looking through
it. As Carson says his next line, Jack, overwhelmed by what he is
holding in his hands, falls to his knees.
Carson
(Sarcastically) Boy, I'll tell you Jack, that's a uuuh� That's a bummer. I'm sorry man. I'm really sorry.
I mean that's bad. The absolute worst. Oh, how I hate the headaches
of this world.
Jack
I need my medication.
Carson
Yeah... I suppose you do don't you?
Pause. Jill gives Carson a small kiss and walks over to the
door.
Carson
There are no fields of flowers Jack. Not since the florists got the flu and died�
Jack
Yeah, I know. I know.
Carson
I know you know.
Jack
I know you know I know.
Carson, with a wicked smile, throws the medicine vial in the air
and catches it. He walks to Jack to deliver his last words, almost
whispering in Jack�s ear.
Carson
And Jack? Don�t lose your medication.
There is a moment of silence, followed by violent laughter from
Carson and Jill as they leave Jack alone with the 900 Paged File
pressed tightly to his chest.
END OF PLAY.