Scene 11 cont..
D - right... 3...2...1...ACTION!!

<lister starts to daydream again>

<the next time he opens his eyes, katie and amy are both stood their half naked>

D - no, no, NO!! thats all wrong amy, you do it like this...

<the director, in the sexist way possible for a balding 57 yr old porno maniac, takes his shirt off>

<lister pounces on him>

L - OH TAKE ME!!! take me nooowww!!

D - what the fuck are you doing?? you are so gay!!

L - im not gay, im homophobic!!

D - u just tried 2 take me with a gerkin! its not even a big gerkin! the best thing u can say about a washed up gay has been wannabe prono star that tried to take u up the ass with a green vegetable is at least he's got the common decency to make sure its fresh!

<lister winks at the director>

D - get out of here!! YOU'RE FIRED!!

L - bu..bu..but..bu...*bottom lip quivers*

D - dont give me that puppy dog look, GO FUCK UR FATHER!

L - i tried that again last week, but he says i wont get anyone until i grow a proper dick..

D - get out u sick fuck!!

so lister ends up trailing the streets looking for a job with his tail hanging between his legs and his gerkin in his back pocket..
on to next scene..
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