journal5

moonday, 16october2000, 11:22am
thehouseofbliss, hsv, ar, usa, earth... Back To Previous Journal Page

well, it's been a while since i've done anything in this journal, not to say i haven't been creatively busy. i have been. Very busy in fact! i've successfully doubled the size of this site by adding the whole "Life In The Natural State" section...a plethora of stuff about my personal life and family photos and other little games i've played with myself...it looks pretty good, if i do say so myself! please check it out, if you haven't already by clicking Life In The Natural State...

i've also been negligeting my participation in the clubs i'm here...i have not been to absolute elsewhere since john's birthday...the last time i went to scottys yellow sub or igors classic rock dreams was days ago...i've just been so busy between building this website...working on my book...taking care of the family...and work at coopershares...i haven't had time to focus on that stuff...i plan to visit them tonight while i'm at work...LOL! i've been tired a lot lately too...i've been getting up around 4:20 in the morning, really...around that time...and working on the websites from then until about 8...when it gets too busy to do that...then i work on the book for a little while until kelly and the kids are up...i spend time with them, doing everything from housework to just playing...then, if it's sunday-thursday, i go off to work around 3pm until about 10pm...where upon i get home, relax for maybe an hour or so before i crash, dream and then get up and do it all over again! if it's friday or saturday night, from 3-10 i do things like socialize, spend more time with family, maybe write if i get the chance...and it's been like this for weeks...No wonder i feel tired!

charlie griggs has left the building...
he finally moved out on friday afternoon. it was a good thing, we really needed some space and he really needs a kick in the ass to get moving on his own things...he is still homeless...he has yet to find a suitable abode, but he's staying with other friends now...we're still trying to find him someplace. he had to rename his band from "entropy" to "nervosa" because there were too many other bands with "entropy" as their name...he and i have also been talking about something called "The Symbiotic Kinship Project"...a loose fitting group of artist working together to develop an alternative/counter-culture scene here in Hot Springs...

princess magnolia and the prince of drama...
maggie and julian are doing great. she is so precious and beautiful. everyday she grows and looks more like kelly. julian is a great big brother to her and a wonderful helper for kelly and me...he is so smart! he blows me away with the thoughts he expresses and things he remembers...we have so much fun being a family together.

kid cass and the flower princess...
cassidy has moved into a new place with his mom up in chicagoland. he has a big room and he's very excited about it all. we miss him something awful. the only dark spot throughout this whole birth and new addition thing has been not having cassidy here to share it with us...we wanted to get him here for a quick weekend visit a.s.a.p., but it's not going to happen. it's both a money thing and a time thing...he'll be here the week between x-mas and new years and we'll be going to chicago in march or april...until then, we talk every few days and there's always e-mail...valerie has made a reappearance in our lives recently. her mother first called last week needing money...then valerie called to talk to kelly...she has been out of contact with us since june because they're mad at me...i didn't have money to send them for valerie's summer school and it erupted into a full blown situation...i've been feeling very bad about it too, sometimes it seems valerie and i will never have a normal relationship. well, i don't know what to do about it...other than send money...but even then, i don't believe for even a moment that valerie really wants to be a part of our family. i don't know. it's all so very confusing to me and i get all knotted up inside trying to think about it...it hurts so fucking much, i tell you, and so i bury it very deep. when it comes to the surface, it's almost overwhelming and i freak on it...someday i willwrite about it, someday i will expell these demons in a story about how this situation became what it is and maybe then, i will be able to deal with it rationally. in the meanwhile, i'm tongue tied and twisted by the whole bloody mess...

work is work and there's nothing more to say about that.

and now, i've completed something i want to share with the world, so you'll excuse me while i set forth an e-mail campaign to notify my friends and family about this newly improved update on my websites...until next time!