Life of an Undergradate Working For the Florida Department of Enviromental Protection
Issue 1 Volume 1

Day: 48

Today I was two and a half hours late for work since I had to take my father to the doctor. When I arrived there everyone was presant. Jackie was doing her normal routine: trying to charm everyone into having a conversation with her so she wouldn't have to do any work. She really seems to like talking about getting drunk, her boyfriend, and sex. How can I relate to her topics? Not at all. Why? Because I'm a goody-goody. Brad had already left... so I didn't get my new Me First and the Gimme Gimmes cd back yet, which is no problem really. James and Sarah were doing what they always do, working like good employees do. Dusty... well I donno what he was doing. I think he filed some. And Luciana was filing too... something you hardly ever see in that department. I spent the day sorting files in the conference room. Boy was that exciting. And to make it even more thrilling, my portable cd player broke, so I got to sort in silenece... what rapture.
Dot adjusted her glasses @8:45 PM

The Life of an Undergraduate working for the Florida Department of Enviromental Protection

The Cast:

Head Cheese

• Doris - our supervisor. Possibly the sweetest person on the planet. She always has classical music playing in her office and a jar full of hershey kisses (that I steal...they're just too yummy!)


• Cissy - nice woman, but I swear she's crazy or something...she's Doris' administratvie assistant. What does that mean? Absolutely nothing.

The Rats

• Myself - have a bad habit of going to work 10 minutes late and leaving 10 minutes early.


• Sarah - if you people think I'm crazy, she's worse than I am! Oh and she absolutely loves coffee...especially frappachinos


• James - Sarah's boyfriend, and head of the file room rats. Likes to listen to death metal and bands with bad singers.


• Jackie - the lazy one


• Luciana - this woman has been working in the file room for THREE YEARS! Most people work there a year, maybe two, and eventually get desperate to find a new job.


• Brad - a 40 year old punk.


• Dusty - the pothead. Dusty is an interesting character. A redneck who talks about .6 words a second, never comes to work on time, and has been accused of falsifying (is that a word?) his time sheets. And guess what! He's not fired yet!


• Drina - works with Brad. Never see her outside of her office, so she won't be mentioned much in here.

Well I would type in today's story but I have an essay for class to finish...but this will give you an idea of the people I work with.
Dot adjusted her glasses @9:32 PM

Yes, I made a change! And gosh darn it, I like it!

I've been listening to Me First and the Gimme Gimmes A LOT this past week... oh geez are those guys FUNNY! Not to mention talented. I have their second cd, Are A Drag, which is a bunch of broadway tunes covers. The Rainbow Connection has to be my favorite...cuz I mean common, how many punks are going to sing songs about rainbows and it have nothing to do with homosexuality?

Dot adjusted her glasses @8:51 PM

Right now it's about 8:19 AM. I'm sitting here at the comp killing time until I start my freshman english class. It's a pretty interesting class... especially the professor, he's an odd man. Yesterday he was preaching to the class about Marxism because an essay we were reading talked about a girl's father being a Marxist historian. So the entire hour 1/2 was about how everything sucks and how stupid we are. I'd just rather give the guy a copy of the "Tao of Pooh" and have him memorize the passage about the uncarved block. I'm not going to say much else because I have to brush my teeth before I leave... they feel nasty... dumb retainers.

"Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be rappers."
Dot adjusted her glasses @8:30 AM

jane be jane
you're better that way
not when you're trying
imitating something you think you saw

jane be jane
and if sometimes that might
drive them away
let them stay there
you don't need them anyway

you're worried there might not be
anything at all inside
but that you're worried
should tell you that's not right
don't try to see yourself
the way that others do
it's no use

you're worried there might not be
anything at all inside
but that you're worried
should tell you that's not right
you've had it harder than anyone could know
so hard to let it go

but it's your life
and you can decorate it
as you like
beneath the paint and armour
in your eyes the truth still shines
jane be jane
jane be jane

I wish I could give you all the happiness in the world, but I can't. I wish I could trade places with you so you can have all that I have, yet still I can't. You say you need some lovin' but why do you need it so soon? For a boy can't bring you any higher in life than you can yourself, so what good is having some lovin' if you cannot love yourself? You are surrounded by friends who care, but you do not let them close to you because you are scared. We try to praise you, make you feel good, but you get defensive and push us away, scared we are just going to lift you up to pull you down. No, that's not what I'm here for. I am here for you whenever you need me, good times or bad, as are all of my and your other friends. But what good can our love do if you have none left for you?
Dot adjusted her glasses @7:37 PM