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THE 1st DRUNKEN BA$#@%DS (DB) BOWLING BASH
RULES

I) ELIGIBILITY CRITERIA:

(a) All males above the age of 21 should pledge his allegiance to the Brotherhood of the DB by taking the oath of allegiance to the DB.

(b) New members will be voted in by a show of hands of all existing DB's.

(c) All new members will be charged entrance / membership fee. The basis of calculation will be: Dhs.10/ for each week of the DB bash that he has missed.

(d) Experienced Bowlers (Definition: Any DB who has bowled before the start of the DB bash) who wish to participate in this prestigious Bash should have a maximum average of 150.

a. If your average is above 150 a fine of Dhs 100/- will be levied for each week that you bowl. This will avoid any permanent psychological damage to other DB's about their performance.

II) TOURNAMENT RULES:

(a) Venue / Day / Time / Duration: Dubai Bowling Centre; Every Friday -- 5 pm until (you get a call from the Wife); 12 Weeks (from 14.11.2003 until 05.02.2004)

(b) Four (4) Games will be played at each weekly DB bash. Game 1 will be practice (warm up). Highest Cumulative Average for the next 3 Games will decide that weeks winner.

III) PENALTIES:

(a) Since the Bash starts at 5pm each Friday, those DB's who cannot make it at all for the Bash will forfeit his games. This does not excuse the DB from paying his kitty money of Dhs.10/-. THERE WILL BE NO EXCEPTIONS. THERE WILL BE NO 'MAKE-UP' GAMES ALLOWED.

(b) Those DB's who arrive late for the Bash will only be allowed to bowl as many games as are remaining for the other DB's. However, your average will be calculated on the basis of 3 games i.e. If you only managed to bowl 2 games, your average will be calculated on the basis of 3 games.

IV) HANDICAP:

(a) Initially, for each of the first 5 weeks of the DB Bash, weekly handicap calculation will be based on the following:

i. Base : Average of all DB's
ii. Handicap: 75%
iii. Maximum: No Limit

(b) Thereafter, from week 6 onwards, weekly handicap calculation will be based on the following:

i. Base : 200
ii. Handicap: 70%
iii. Maximum: 50

V) PRIZE MONEY & TROPHY:

(a) Weekly winner gets to take home the 'Drunken Bastard Weekly Bowling Bash' rolling trophy. You have to bring it back next week.

(b) After 12 weeks the overall winner will be decided (Based on cumulative average of the 12 weeks ). The Winner will get to keep the trophy for Good.

(c) All DB's to contribute Dhs.10/- in a kitty any time before start of 1st Game or by end of 4th Game. Rule applies even if you have not taken part for that week.

(d) Kitty will be spent on all the DB's, their wives and their children at a grand celebration to be held at Villa No 3 or Villa No 7 (sometime in the future).

VI) DB'S WIVES AND DB'S CHILDREN:

(a) Unfortunately due to the tension packed environment, DB's wives and their children will not be allowed to Bowl when the DB bash is in progress. They can attend the event and cheer their respective DB's (or deride/chastise/abuse other DB's as the case may be).

(b) However, if the Wives or Children use strong arm tactics then the DB's will PERMIT their Wives or Children to bowl, provided they bowl a minimum 15 lanes away from the DB bash.

(c) All Wives will provide massages to their respective DB's after completion of each bash. Preferably the massage should be with scented, eroticatherapy oils. If you don't have a wife or if your wife is not willing to massage you - Check out all hot spots in Dubai.

VII) DB REPRESENTATION IN LOCAL / INTERNATIONAL TOURNAMENTS:

(a) The Top 8 DB's will be chosen to represent the 'DB' at all leading Local/International Bowling events to be held around the UAE/World/Universe.

(b) In some local tournaments, mixed teams are required. In such cases, Wives of DB's will not be allowed to participate (Due to their iincessant nagging which will surely continue at the Alley).

(c) Each DB (in the above case) should take on the responsibility to search for a female who can make the DB Brotherhood proud. However, there is a sub clause to this which basically states that the female's figures should be 46-26-28,…….. Er, I mean her average should be above 150 but below 180.

(d) To avoid any marriage disputes, the female should not have a better figure/looks than any of the DB's wives.

(e) Unless, the Brotherhood of the DB can obtain sponsorship for any tournament fees (including Airfare/Hotel Stay/Cocktails), each DB will be required to contribute equally to the tournament damages.

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THE 1st DRUNKEN BA$#@%DS (DB) BOWLING BASH RULES I) ELIGIBILITY CRITERIA: (a) All males above the age of 21 should pledge his allegiance to the Brotherhood of the DB by taking the oath of allegiance to the DB. (b) New members will be voted in by a show of hands of all existing DB's. (c) All new members will be charged entrance / membership fee. The basis of calculation will be: Dhs.10/ for each week of the DB bash that he has missed. (d) Experienced Bowlers (Definition: Any DB who has bowled before the start of the DB bash) who wish to participate in this prestigious Bash should have a maximum average of 150. a. If your average is above 150 a fine of Dhs 100/- will be levied for each week that you bowl. This will avoid any permanent psychological damage to other DB's about their performance. II) TOURNAMENT RULES: (a) Venue / Day / Time / Duration: Dubai Bowling Centre; Every Friday -- 5 pm until (you get a call from the Wife); 12 Weeks (from 14.11.2003 until 05.02.2004) (b) Four (4) Games will be played at each weekly DB bash. Game 1 will be practice (warm up). Highest Cumulative Average for the next 3 Games will decide that weeks winner. (c) Each DB's pays for his own game + shoes, which in any case will be around Dhs43/- per week. III) PENALTIES: (a) Since the Bash starts at 5pm each Friday, those DB's who cannot make it at all for the Bash will forfeit his games. This does not excuse the DB from paying his kitty money of Dhs.10/-. THERE WILL BE NO EXCEPTIONS. THERE WILL BE NO 'MAKE-UP' GAMES ALLOWED. (b) Those DB's who arrive late for the Bash will only be allowed to bowl as many games as are remaining for the other DB's. However, your average will be calculated on the basis of 3 games i.e. If you only managed to bowl 2 games, your average will be calculated on the basis of 3 games. IV) HANDICAP: (a) Initially, for each of the first 5 weeks of the DB Bash, weekly handicap calculation will be based on the following: i. Base : Average of all DB's ii. Handicap: 75% iii. Maximum: No Limit (b) Thereafter, from week 6 onwards, weekly handicap calculation will be based on the following: i. Base : 200 ii. Handicap: 70% iii. Maximum: 50 (c) The handicap will be added to each game score but will not be counted for the cumulative average. V) PRIZE MONEY & TROPHY: (a) Weekly winner gets to take home the 'Drunken Bastard Weekly Bowling Bash' rolling trophy. You have to bring it back next week. (b) After 12 weeks the overall winner will be decided (Based on cumulative average of the 12 weeks ). The Winner will get to keep the trophy for Good. (c) All DB's to contribute Dhs.10/- in a kitty any time before start of 1st Game or by end of 4th Game. Rule applies even if you have not taken part for that week. (d) Kitty will be spent on all the DB's, their wives and their children at a grand celebration to be held at Villa No 3 or Villa No 7 (sometime in the future). VI) DB'S WIVES AND DB'S CHILDREN: (a) Unfortunately due to the tension packed environment, DB's wives and their children will not be allowed to Bowl when the DB bash is in progress. They can attend the event and cheer their respective DB's (or deride/chastise/abuse other DB's as the case may be). (b) However, if the Wives or Children use strong arm tactics then the DB's will PERMIT their Wives or Children to bowl, provided they bowl a minimum 15 lanes away from the DB bash. (c) All Wives will provide massages to their respective DB's after completion of each bash. Preferably the massage should be with scented, eroticatherapy oils. If you don't have a wife or if your wife is not willing to massage you - Check out all hot spots in Dubai. VII) DB REPRESENTATION IN LOCAL / INTERNATIONAL TOURNAMENTS: (a) The Top 8 DB's will be chosen to represent the 'DB' at all leading Local/International Bowling events to be held around the UAE/World/Universe. (b) In some local tournaments, mixed teams are required. In such cases, Wives of DB's will not be allowed to participate (Due to their iincessant nagging which will surely continue at the Alley). (c) Each DB (in the above case) should take on the responsibility to search for a female who can make the DB Brotherhood proud. However, there is a sub clause to this which basically states that the female's figures should be 46-26-28,…….. Er, I mean her average should be above 150 but below 180. (d) To avoid any marriage disputes, the female should not have a better figure/looks than any of the DB's wives. (e) Unless, the Brotherhood of the DB can obtain sponsorship for any tournament fees (including Airfare/Hotel Stay/Cocktails), each DB will be required to contribute equally to the tournament damages.