Since the downfall of the FFH and Satan's Army of Hate, everything in Santa Fe had been peaceful. That's fortunate, of course, because there was no more Fabulous Five to secure peace. No more Portals to the Underworld and no more evil plans. The Underworld had been closed off to Santa Fe for the time being.

It was now fourteen long years after everything had gone kaput. Sasha and Grace were living together after one of the sprayings at Grace's place had gone awry and mutated half of her neighborhood into hideous freaks. Neither of them worked, and they passed all their time playing tiddlywinks and Mortal Combat III. Their days of crime-fighting were long since over.

Baltor's family went bankrupt after the stock market crashed again, so he was reduced to living in the sewer and eating bits of food that would float by in clumps of rotted sewage. He was far from miserable, as he found several other rats like himself to become friends with and pass the time with.

Puttynut died about three years after the Fabulous Five had been torn apart by the departure of Tyrant. He ascended into Heaven and now worked full-time at the Happy Souls Factory, where new souls were manufactured and sent out to the earth to be tested, and maybe one day used. Puttynut loved it there. Heaven was a great place, and he had made friends with God (Which would come in handy some time later).

Nobody had seen or heard from Tyrant ever since he threw a hissy fit and left the Fabulous Five. Nobody ever really noticed he was gone, to be quite honest, so they never said anything.

Not much was going on in the Underworld. Skippy, Gonzo, and Fuz still hadn't been released from their thousand-degree holding cell. They were finally beginning to grow used to it, though, so only months should go by and they'd be released into the frozen depths of the Underworld.

And Nigel (Remember Nigel?).....Nigel was living next to a mad scientist. He truly was mad. Any time an experiment went wrong, out the window and into the garden it went. I can only say too much about the garden, which was a beautiful display of exotic plants and flowers that nobody had ever seen before. It had begun as a patch of gardenias. The mad scientist was currently working on a boy. A perfect boy. This boy had been in the developmental stage for the past fourteen years and was now just large enough to climb out of his test tube and walk across the table. As he did so, the mad scientist sprinkled a bit of sugar on him. At once the boy grew to a height of five feet and six inches tall.

So it had happened. Archie Archbanger was born into this cruel, cruel world after spending fourteen years in a cold, wet test tube (I like to call it a "womb with a view"). He took his first few breaths of oxygen and smiled. He liked this place.

Continue on to Episode II: A Reunion