Flight 97 -- The Okanogan Flying Circus!
"Bombardier Rhapsody"
[opening sfx: pilot gasps for oxygen]
"Is this the real war?
"Is this not fantasy?
"Caught in a Lan-cast-er
"O'er enemy territory."
"Open your eyes,
"Look up to the skies and seeeeeeee...."
I'm just a buff pilot,
I get no sympathy.
Because it's,
"AI guns--got to go!"
"Fly up high, you're too low!"
Any way the tanks roll,
Doesn't really matter
to meeeeee....
to meee.
C.O.--
Just bombed a van.
Put the crosshairs on its head,
Pressed my keyboard, now its dead.
C.O.--the flight had just begun,
But now I've gone and thrown my load away....
C.O.--
...ooooooOOOoooOOOOOoooh!
Didn't mean to make you mad.
If I'm not back at base in time for chow,
Carry on, carry on,
As if there's extra helpings....
[GE fighter does a B-n-Z attack, ripping the buff's wings]:
Too late!
My fuel is gone....
Engines sputter and they whine, [sfx: another hit]
Airframe's creaking all the time.
Goodbye everybody, it's time to bail!
Gotta leave you all behind and hit the silk!
C.O.--
....ooooOOOOooooOOOOOoooohhh!
("Any way the tanks roll....")
I don't wanna die!
I sometimes wish I'd never subscribed at all....
[bailout riff]
[members of the 435th appear on the scene, chatting over RW]:
"I see a little silhouetto of a man--
"Parachute! Parachute! Can you see the man dangle?"
Thunderbolts and Lightnings!
Look how close they're flying!
Eeeeeeek!
"THERE'S A ZERO, There's a Zero, THERE'S A ZERO, There's a Zero,
"There's the Zero--where'd he go?"
"Where did he goooooOOOOOOOOooooooooooOOOOOOOOO...??"
I'm just a buff pilot,
Nobody loves me....
"He's just a buff pilot,
"From a Buff Squad-a-ron,
"Spare him his stats from this a-trocity."
Easy come, easy go, will you let me go?
"Mes-ser-schmitt! NO! We will not let you go!"
"(Let him go!)"
"Mi-tsu-bishi! We will not let you go!"
"(Let him go!)"
"La-vo-chkin! We will not let you go!"
"Let me go!"
"Will not let you go!"
"Let me go!"
"Will not let you go!"
Oh, Let me gooooooooooooooo!
"LoL! LoL! LoL! LoL! LoL! LoL! LoL!!!"
Oh, someone help me! Someone help me!
"Call a Sysops! Let me go!"
"!Fox@Zone has a subscription set aside for meee....
"For meeeeeee.....For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
[Furball riff]
[Buff pilot gets killed in chute, returns in a George seeking revenge]:
So you think you could cannon and rocket me high??
So you think you can shoot me and leave me to die?
Ohhhhhh, We'll see!!
Can't do this to me, you'll see!
Just gotta down you,
Payback for spilling my beer!
[Buff pilot, not knowing how to fly a fighter, can't even survive in a George. Shot down again]:
"Oooohhooooohhhhoooooooooohhhhooohhhh....Ohhhh, crud! Ohhhh, crud!"
Nothing really matters,
This is just a game.
Nothing really matters--
Nothing really matters,
But meeeeeeee.
("Any way the tanks roll....")
Hangar Entrance[1] Flight Roster[2] Pilots' Lounge & Message Board[3] Scrapbook[4] Flight Emblem[5] Links Page[6]
Glossary (for those unfamilliar with the game Fighter Ace.)
Lancaster: The Avro Lancaster, one of Britain's huge 4-engined bombers in WWII. Biggest bomb load in the game.
Buff: Bomber, especially a large 4-engined one. Vunerable to attack from fighters, especially if flying at low altitudes.
Bombardier: Someone on a bomber who aims and drops the bomb load. Yes, that's the way it's spelled.
Tanks: Armored vehicles controlled by the game's AI. Drop enough bombs on a railstation or airfield, and you can trigger an attack by your side's tanks and take over enemy territory.
Van: A rail car attatched to a locomotive. Not worth too many points in the game..
AI: Artificial Intelligence. AI guns are the tailgunners on a buff that are supposed to fire automatically when enemy fighters get too close. Some claim they are too accurate.
C.O.: Commanding Officer. Leader of a Fighter Ace Squadron.
GE: Germany in Fighter Ace.
B-n-Z: "Boom and Zoom," a high speed hit and run attack.
435th: A Fighter Ace Squadron known for shooting down players who are in their parachutes.
RW: Roger Wilco, a computer program allowing players to have voice communications while flying Fighter Ace.
Zero: A famous WWII Japanese fighter.
Thunderbolts and Lightnings: famous American WWII Fighters.
Stats: Statistics--a player's "scores" in the game, such as the kills vs. deaths ratio.
Messerschmitt, Mitsubishi, and Lavochkin: well know German, Japanese, and Soviet aircraft manufacturers in WWII.
Sysops: Systems Operator. People who help keep order in the game, run events, enforce the Code of Conduct, and help people having technical difficulties.
!Fox@Zone: From the weekly event, "Fox Hunt." Shoot down !Fox@ Zone, and get a free one month subscription to Fighter Ace.
George: Another Japanese Fighter plane in WWII. Very effective fighter, relatively easy to fly in the game.
Cannons and Rockets: some of the aircraft weaponry, like 20mm cannons, and air-to-ground rockets (often used as air-to-air rockets in the game.)
Spilling my beer: An occurence that happens to many Fighter Ace pilots in times of high stress.