Never Goodbye

Ever since I was young, I’d mapped my life out. Figured out how everything would follow. I would work at my mothers store full time for a year when high school was finished. Then I’d go to fashion school, probably in New York and refine my skills. After school I would intern at some fashion studio and after a few years try to branch out on my own. Justin Timberlake never came into those plans, but when he entered my life, it was never the same.

Sometimes I think back to that night years ago when Lisa and I huddled together over that ouija board. Sometimes I wonder about Curly – if actually exists and if so if he’s making his way to me. I never used to believe in faith. Not until Justin. But everything that happened to us…it was almost as if, it was all meant to be.

Maybe it was. I guess, I’ll never know.

One year later…

Justin…

Justin Timberlake smiled, as he looked over at the other members of Nsync who were goofing off in front of the MTV cameras. They were almost finished filming their first video for the first single “Remarkable” on their newest album.

It was completely different from their last album and this video was going to show people a new side of Nsync. He couldn’t help but think about how different it was compared to their last video… which inadvertently made him think of her.

He found it frustrating that it still bothered him; the fact that she had walked out of his life without a backward glance. He was amazed at how much he felt for this one girl who he hadn’t known for long but had been connected to before they even met.

It still amazed him how much it hurt to think about the time after she had left. For the first few weeks after the dinner, he had called her but she had refused to talk to him. Instead, he found himself talking to her mother who refused to disclose anything. It wasn’t until a month later when he called (the last time, he told himself at the time) that her mother had told him that Victoria was leaving and had no intention of telling him where.

And that was when the anger hit him. Hurt pride, rejection and righteousness overwhelmed him. What had he done? Why was he bending over backwards for this girl who so easily walked away from him?

From that day on, he promised himself to forget about it…and her. It hadn’t been easy, but being on vacation and hanging with the guys, his friends back home and his family had really helped. There were the off times when he’d see the video for Digital Get Down or he’d listen to a Stevie Wonder track and think about her but he just brushed any sentiment that came with the memories away.

He looked up to see one of the extras smiling at him. She was a pretty redhead and she had been flirting with him for the last couple of days that they had been filming. That was another thing that Victoria had done to him. Ever since that night with her when he broke it off with Pamela, he hadn’t been with anyone else. It was almost as if he couldn’t be with anyone else but her. This only made him angrier because he owed her nothing. It made him want to take up the offer he could see in the redheads eyes…maybe he would have, if he and the other guys weren’t leaving that day.

“Justin, get over here!” JC called, as they were about to get ready to finish the video. He smiled, ran over and pretended that nothing was bothering him.

Victoria…

“Ok Dad…Yes, I’m positive that I don’t need a lift to the airport…Yes, I’ll call you as soon as I get there…I love you too…mmhmm…’kay…Bye!”

Victoria smiled as she finished the call with her father and turned her cell phone off. She looked around the dorm room she had shared with two other roommates for the last year. It looked so empty without all the personal things that used to cover the area. She was going home for the summer. Two months to relax before she had to come back and continue her fashion course.

She thought back on what had pushed her into applying to the school in the first place. Justin. After the whole Pamela incident, she had been so upset about the whole thing that she had rashly decided to go to design school in New York that year. She could have stayed home but she needed to get away. Start over without any reminders of anything Justin related. And there were tons of reminders where she lived.

It had been a year since they’d last seen each other. A year since she had walked away and sometimes she wondered what would have happened if she had just stayed and listened to what he had to say. She remembered the weeks that he had kept calling her and she had refused to talk to him – her pride was too strong to bend. Now, she wasn’t mad at him anymore. She could even say his name without any bitterness. She just wished that…she didn’t really know.

She sighed and shook her head as if to sweep aside the thoughts. No more thinking about Justin. It was done and over with. She looked at her watch. She needed to get moving; her flight was only in a couple of hours.

She turned her phone back on and called a cab. After hanging up, she took one last look around and left the room, suitcases in hand. It didn’t take long for the cab to show up and for her to be on her way to the airport.

She suddenly remembered the package she had gotten a few days before from Lisa. She rummaged through her carry on bag and found it. She smiled as she opened the envelope. There was a letter, a CD and a magazine in it. She already knew what the magazine held. Lisa always sent her a magazine if she was on the cover or featured in it.

She took it out and smiled. Lisa was on the cover of a teen magazine and she looked great. She put the magazine back in her bag and took out the letter. Lisa told her about the usual stuff, about how the career was going, their mutual friends and asked her about how everything was going.

Toria was amused at the fact that Lisa always asked her what was happening in her life, because Lisa knew. Lisa was down in New York almost once every month – she always had some photo shoot or other. Toria was grateful that she got to see her friend relatively often. It kept her from getting homesick.

At the end of the letter, Lisa remarked about the CD and how she made it specifically with Toria in mind. Toria looked at the back to see what songs Lisa had chosen for her but they weren’t listed. She decided to listen to them when she got on the plane. It was going to be a long ride and she’d need something to do.

Once they got to the airport she paid the cabby, got her suitcases and made her way to the departure area. Her heart lifted at the thought that she would be home soon. She loved New York but it would be nice to be home.

In Sync…

“I’m bored. Entertain me!” Justin said to Chris as their plane departed.

Chris rolled his eyes. “Shut up! I’m trying to sleep here. I didn’t get any sleep last night. We stayed out too late.”

“You’re getting boring in your old age, man.”

“That may be so. But I can still kick your scrawny ass. Now shut up!” Chris adjusted the seat and completely dismissed Justin by shutting his eyes.

Once the plane finally took off. Victoria unbuckled her seatbelt and looked through her bag for her CD player and the CD Lisa sent her. She placed the CD in the player and rested her head on the seat. Victoria almost burst out laughing when she heard the first song it was old school Janet Jackson, Nasty. Victoria hadn’t been expecting it at all. She wondered what other goodies Lisa had in store for her.

The smile remained on her face until she got to the third song on the CD. It was Nsync. It was a song she had never heard before. It was slow, not soft or gentle but powerful. It wasn’t until the second verse that Justin began to sing. His voice sounded amazing and it wrapped around her like a blanket.

When the chorus began again she realized that it sounded familiar. She’d heard it before this, she was sure of it but where—and then she knew. Girl to me you are remarkable. It echoed in her mind harshly. Girl to me you are remarkable. The boy on the plane had been Justin. All this time she had wondered who he was and he had been right there all the time.

Victoria closed her eyes and sighed. Justin.

Justin looked around to see if any of the other guys wanted to talk but they all seemed to have the same idea as Chris – to get some sleep. With the late nights and the early mornings, they had been having, not to mention the video shoots long hours, he wasn’t surprised that they were all getting some rest.

Unfortunately, he was too keyed up to do the same. He unbuckled his seatbelt and got up. He needed to stretch his legs. I’m sure the stewardess’ won’t mind if I take a little walk. “Hey Jeff! I’m going to go check the rest of the plane. No, don’t come with me!” He motioned Jeff to sit down when he saw that the bodyguard was about to get up. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” With that said he turned on his heel and made his way to the other sections of the plane.

The curtains rustled and Toria opened her eyes to see him making his way down the aisle. Justin? What was he doing here? Panic hit her as he paused, looked down and met her eyes.

Justin’s eyes widened and his breath stilled as he met Victoria’s shocked gaze. What was she doing here?

Seeing him so soon, after hearing the song and connecting the fact that he had been the boy on the plane, sent her senses reeling. All of the feelings she felt for him overwhelmed her instantly and she was incapable of thinking straight, so she did the first thing that came to her mind. She got up and kissed him.

Justin went still with shock as Victoria’s lips met his. Her lips moved on his, slowly, softly, and her hands slid up his shoulders. He regained his senses enough to kiss her back. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and she pressed herself closer.

“Ahem!”

They both jerked back as a stewardess came down the aisle giving them both pointed looks. “Sir. You are blocking the aisle.”

Victoria could feel her face go red as she noticed the stares of the seven other occupants in the section, on them. She sat back down and Justin followed her by sitting in the seat beside her.

Now that he didn’t have the distraction of Victoria’s soft body pressed against his he could think straight. And he found that he was growing angry. Very angry with her.

He turned to her and said in a hard voice. “Why?”

Victoria blinked. The sudden change in him left her wary and unsure. Why was he angry? Wasn’t she the one who had that right? “Why what? The kiss—I don’t know why I did it. It just happ—“

”No.” He interrupted. “Not that. Why did you leave? Why didn’t you answer my calls? Why did you give me the sudden cold shoulder?”

She was taken aback by the vehemence of his questions but she was also angry. “Why do you think Justin? Because of Pamela. Because you were still together and I didn’t think you gave a damn about me. Because I saw you kiss her the morning I left.”

Now it was his turn to be stunned. “Kiss?” He thought back to the morning and it finally dawned on him. “I didn’t kiss Pamela. I was giving her a hug because I felt it was the least I could do after breaking up with her and then she kissed me. I pulled back. I never kissed her back. I haven’t seen her since that day.”

Victoria still looked sceptical. He was confused. Wasn’t the way he had treated her that night…on those occasions that they’d talked, obvious indication that he cared about her? Well if she didn’t know, he had to make her realize it.

He turned completely and faced her. “Listen to me. I had been on the verge of breaking up with Pamela for weeks. I just never got the chance. I knew I didn’t want to be with her for a while but it wasn’t until we talked the night of the concert that I knew I couldn’t be with her…because of the way I felt for you. No, no listen.” He said when she was about to interrupt. “On the night of the car accident I came to you. I stood over your bed, saw you, and felt all these things that I’d never felt before. I kept thinking about you for weeks, months and then we met at the video shoot and I thought you were amazing. And then I found out that you and the girl in the accident were the same and it hit me just how much I felt for you. The night you spent at my house only emphasized the fact.”

He looked at her seriously, his voice growing softer as it filled with emotion. “I don’t want to say love because it’s too soon. But I do want to say that what I feel for you runs deep; it’s something raw and very real. We’re connected. I know this is going to come out corny and cliché, I don’t care – We have something special.”

Toria couldn’t speak. There weren’t any words that could express what she was feeling at that moment. All she knew was that he was telling her the truth. Because she had felt it too. They had a connection. From the first time she heard him mumble to himself about his song to the accident that had influenced their lives to now.

She smiled at him. A soft smile. “I know we do.”

Justin let out a breath that he didn’t know he had been holding. It was going to be ok; they were going to be ok.

Chris poked his head through the curtain sometime later and noticed the couple talking softly to each other.

He walked over to them casually. He acknowledged Victoria with a grin before turning to Justin. “Hey Curly, are you coming back? We’re breaking out the cards.”

Justin shook his head. “Not right now—and stop calling me that.”

Chris smirked. “Yes, I can see you are rather pleasantly preoccupied.” Justin gave him an unamused glare.

“Fine, fine. But if you guys want to play…come over.” He turned around and walked back to his section.

Victoria had missed most of that exchange; she had stopped listening after the word Curly. Curly? Justin was Curly?

She suddenly laughed aloud.

Justin looked at her funny. “What?”

She smiled and laid her head on his shoulder. “Nothing. Nothing at all.”

 

 

 

The End.

 

Copyright © 2002 Village

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