Ah, grasshopper.  You ask most intelligent questions.  Seekers of knowledge, gather round.  This is a long one.  I broke it up into three parts.
Love --  Part I

How do you know for sure?  That is THE question.  As a single person, I asked every married person I knew, especially older people who had been married for a zillion years, and they answer was always �You just know.�  Thanks -- fat lot of help that is.  Could you be a tiny bit more specific pleeeeeaaassse?  So here is my attempt to quantify the (possibly) unquantifiable.

First of all, until you know what you want, you will never know if you have it.  Makes sense, no?  I think that like any major decisions in life, preparation and research are the keys.  With every guy I dated, I made mental notes of what I liked and what I didn�t.  I would say to myself (as we were nearing the end) �My next boyfriend is going to be ______________ (better with money, employed, more affectionate, more responsible, less of a sex hound, wear suits more often, whatever - you fill in the blank).�  Whatever this one wasn�t.  And, �My next boyfriend will definitely give back/foot rubs like ________________ (Tom, Mike, John, whoever) did.�  The
list begins this way. 

Now, so far this list is about Level One stuff.  Looks, Likes, Dislikes, Employment, Responsibilities, Habits, Etc.  Level Two stuff is the really deep and important stuff, like Values, Morals, Ethics, Etc.  I mean, you can learn to live with a guy who doesn�t give backrubs, but with an ax murderer?  NO.  You see the difference?  Not to say that Level One stuff isn�t important, because it is.  The difference is that some things in Level One can be taught or changed, whereas Level Two is what it is, and if it�s not a match, then it ain�t gonna work.



continued...
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