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Good Evening. Just a quick update tonight. I am going to be adding and changing some things over the next few weeks, to my page that is. I will be listing my exercise for the day with each journal update, a link page (email me if you'd like to be added), and I will be adding one new low fat recipe with every update. My recipe section has been neglected lately. I worked really hard on it (back in July 2000) and I have never even finished. I started this page back then, and it never got used. So... Anyway, I added a new recipes tonight under "Poultry Entree's, please take a look at it. Oh, just so you know. All my recipes include nutritional information to make it easy on those of you counting calories. I am a somewhat simple person and I like to cook simple meals. I hate reading recipes with ingredients that I've never heard of. Most of these recipes will be easy to follow with common food items. If anyone wants a certain recipe, that isn't listed here, yet, please email me and I will do my best to find it.

Life is beautiful and I am happy to be me. I am so pumped about all of this, it isn't even funny. I have been stronger this last week then I have been during all of this. It's so easy to think before I eat now. Don't ask me why, it just is. If I start thinking I want a cookie for example, I sit there and analyze it over and over in my head why I want it. This one part of my brain (the good part) starts telling me how much more exercise I will have to do just for one little cookie. Although, I don't mind exercise now, I wouldn't say I enjoy it. This other part of my brain (the bad part) starts telling me how "it's just one cookie, what's it going to hurt?". I am proud to say, the good part has been winning lately and I am that much closer to my goal because of it. I am not saying not to eat a cookie. By all means, if you really want one, eat it. I'm just saying, think about it first. Get to know yourself, you'll be amazed at what you can learn. After thinking about it for awhile chances are you might not want it, but if you still do, then eat it, savor it and move on.

*UPDATE*

Hope you all have had a great few days. I've been keeping pretty busy. My daughter is in Girl Scouts and she has been selling cookies. So, I've been driving all over the place trying to deliver them all. I am so glad this is the last year she can be in girl scouts, but then again, the other girls still can in due time. Of course I had to be a good mommy and buy a few boxes, 6 to be exact. I froze a few boxes and have only ate 3 cookies so far. I am staying strong.

I've been doing my walking on the treadmill at the Y. I usually get in a mile. For same strange reason, it's getting harder each time, instead of easier like I thought it would. My calves and the muscles around my shins, burns so bad, sometimes I don't think I am going to be able to finish. I am hoping, eventually, it will get easier. I know that my body is not used to this, once it is, I hope the pain will stop. Speaking of treadmills... The kids broke mine soon after I got it, Christmas 2000. It was a cheap one, as far as treadmills go. To make it go faster, you simply turned a knob. Well the kids were playing on it, without my knowledge of course, and one of them turned the knob a little to far and it snapped. The only way to fix it is to replace the whole console, $50.00. Not that that is really expensive, but we never really wanted to part with it. Well... The part is on back order until mid-March, then it is on it's way. It will be nice having it working again. I can't make it to the Y everyday, so at least I will have a back up for when I can't instead of sitting home, feeling guilty.

One thing I haven't mentioned in quite some time. I wrote an entry a couple months ago, talking about some pretty bad heel pain. It was most painful when I would first wake up, then it would slowly start getting better throughout the day. Well, I am pleased to say, the pain is gone now. It has been gone for at least a month now. It is really nice waking up in the morning being able to walk instead of limping for a good half hour. The pain started when I got up over 260 lbs, and now that I am back down, it stopped, just like that. Wonder what other things I will notice as I drop more weight? Maybe my back will stop hurting. One can hope.

Well if this isn't the most boring entry ever, nothing is. Anyway, I will try and update more often. My husband had 3 days off work this week, so I haven't been on the computer much at all. Oh and before I forget. The 3 things I said I didn't want for Valentines day, I got one of them. Flowers. Don't get me wrong, I love flowers. I just can't see spending the money on something that will die so soon. I would have rather had a live plant or live flowers. Anyway, it's the thought that counts and I am not disappointed. That's all for now. Take care.

Hello and welcome! Just a quick update tonight. I've had about 4 hours of sleep since last night. *Yawn* I'm tired. Anyway, let's see... Not a whole lot has happened over the last couple days. I used my "Free meal ticket", so to speak, for supper tonight. I had some Taco Bell. I think my stomach is shrinking, finally. I ate a lot less then normal and felt very satisfied. Oh oh oh... Something really cool did happen today. I was driving in the car, and I kind of flung my hair because it was stuck in my jacket. I'll be damned if my wedding ring didn't go flying off my finger. It didn't get lost. I know, it sounds weird to get so excited about a precious ring flying off your finger, but to me, it means I am losing weight and that is my goal, so it's a good thing. Also, I got out of bed this morning, and my tummy actually felt flatter. I almost felt like I was thin. I know I am not, but just to get a taste of it, really made me want more! My size 20 stretchy jeans, I can now slip them off without having to unzip or unbutton them. Back in September of last year. I had to suck in just to get them zipped. I hate shopping for jeans more then anything in the whole world. I've literally sat in the dressing room crying because jeans that I've picked off the rack, that look like they will fit, I couldn't even get over my thighs. Shopping for jeans is very depressing to me. But, it also can be a motivator, if you let it be. Point... I am not ready to buy new jeans and probably won't until the 2 pairs that I own (they are exactly the same by the way) start falling to my ankles while I am walking. I think that is all I can dish out for tonight... Hope everyone has a wonderful and Happy Valentines Day. Any men that might be reading this, do NOT buy your girlfriend, wife, mother or whoever chocolates. I made my husband promise not to get me chocolates. HEHE Actually, I didn't give him very much to choose from. I told him absolutely, no chocolates, flowers, or jewelry. Chocolates: Don't need them. Flowers: A waste of money on something that will die 2 days later. Jewelry: I never wear it, expect my wedding ring, and that took a lot of getting used to. Anyway, take care. :)

Good afternoon! I decided to do an early update today, while I wait for the laundry to finish. I have made another decision today. I have decided to do away with the free day. Instead, I will have a free meal day. Which means, I will choose one day out of the week. That day, I will eat normal (healthy) except for one meal and one snack for the day. It doesn't matter which meal it is, breakfast, lunch or dinner. I will eat whatever I want for that one meal (I am thinking pizza sounds really good right now). For a snack I can choose a candy bar or whatever sounds good at the time, but it can only be one item. Meaning, I am not going to turn my snack into a meal in itself. I really think this will work better for me. I am sick of sabotaging all my weight loss efforts because of one day! So, that's the way I am going to do it from now on.

I was watching Maury Povich today. It really hit home with what I was just talking about last night. There was a little girl on there today. She was 4 years old and weighed 208lbs! It was so sad. The little girl could barely walk. You could hear how hard it was just for her to breath. 4 years old. Who do you blame in a situation like that? Most would probably blame the mother, which was hefty as well. Some might actually blame the child. Maybe some would blame both. Then again, some might look at it as just one of those things that happens. Whoever or whatever is to blame, I just really hope she can get help. She was in pretty bad shape.

Okay, laundry is done so now I need to go fold it and start cleaning the kitchen. Take care all.

Hello everyone. Sorry about the lack of updates lately, been busy, ya know? I've exercised every day, except today. My daughter is not doing well in the daycare, they've had to page me a couple of times to come get her. So, I have to wait to go until my husband wakes up so he can watch her. The Y closed at 7:00 pm today, he didn't wake up til 6:30 pm. I'm going tomorrow though. I can't wait. Not only do I feel better about finally exercising, I love getting out of the house and away from the kids for awhile. My husband still hasn't hid the scale from me, so I've stepped on it a few more times. The numbers are finally moving in the right direction. I think I will go ahead and post an official weigh-in tomorrow, but I still plan on not weighing myself for a month, so this will be the last one until then.

I know I promised a picture and haven't posted one yet. I haven't forgot, I will get one this week, I promise. Honestly, I don't think you will see that much of a difference, at least I don't see one. I am about 20lbs lighter then I was at my last picture post, so we'll see.

My daughter Kendra bought Rollercoaster Tycoon with some of her birthday money. I've been playing it somewhat, it's pretty fun. Now we get to fight over who gets to play it. :P Speaking of Kendra. I don't think I've mentioned this before, because it's very sensitive to me. Kendra is overweight. I am really worried about her. I know what the pain of being fat feels like. I really don't want her to have to go through it. I've tried to do things to help her, without making her feel bad about herself. I really don't want to give her a complex. I am having a difficult time trying to figure out how to address it. She is so damn sensitive, if I make an issue out of it, she'll be in tears. I know one change I can make is for our whole family to eat healthy. Stop buying the junk food that I always felt like I shouldn't take away from my kids just because I was dieting. They don't need it. It's funny how I had that in my head that they did. I know that once in awhile, everyone needs something sweet, and that's ok. I don't really see her eating to terribly much actually. Her biggest problem is, she doesn't move enough. She has always been the type of kid that is happiest sitting down playing, drawling, reading, watching TV. Tonight she actually came to me and told me she wants to lose weight. I was very excited hearing her say that. I don't know why, but we have never really talked about her weight. It's almost like I was starting to think she didn't even realize she was heavy. So, I told her that as a family, we were going to start eating better. She wants to go to the Y with me tomorrow after school and try some of the weight machines. They have some that are designed just for kids her age. I am not sure about the treadmill or anything else, but at the very least, maybe we can walk the track together. This is very exciting to me and scary at the same time. Scary only because I have such a hard time with my own weight, I am not sure I can handle my weight loss and hers. It will all work out I am sure. I told her they even have aerobics for her age group. She didn't really seem to excited about that heehee. She must get that from me. Anyway, I think we are off to a good start. To me she has made the first step and that's where it starts. I am going to try and plan a menu for a week in advance and shop accordingly. I will plan out each and every thing that goes in our mouth and stick to it. We'll see how it goes. If anyone has an overweight child and are dealing with the same issue, I'd really appreciate an email and some advice. That's all for now. Take care.