When I was growing up, I saw two ways of life: the Black way and the White way. I would see a White man who stayed married with his wife was involved in the lives of his children, and I would look down on the fact that my parents were divorced, and my "father" barely spent time with me. I would notice White mothers chatting and having fun with her neatly groomed children, and Black mothers slapping and swearing at her disheveled children. While I saw White children with high IQs and proper etiquette, and saw Black children who were disrespectful to others, and said sentences like "How old you is?"
Needless to say, I began to think at a young age that White people were superior, and that Black people were stupid, worthless, and unattractive losers. Frequently, I wanted to be White. In my lifetime, I have never had any Black heroes, except Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks. For any child to grow up like this can prove to be disastrous, yet this type of ethnic/racial shame is what many children go through in life, particularly Black children.
One may suggest several ideas as to where such positive and negative characteristics come from. Firstly, one may suggest that the aforementioned Black parents are to blame for not watching their children or not taking good care of them, or the people in their community for their drug selling, gang activity, prostitution, etc. Secondly, one may suggest that the way a child is going to be raised depends on how much money the parent makes, and that will depend on their race/ethnicity. Then there will be all those others who suggest that such indifference between Blacks and Whites will remain, because of the stereotype that Blacks are nothing but stupid, lazy, delinquents, and they deserve what they are doing to themselves, or what others do to them.
While I agree with the first two opinions, I disagree with the third. I believe that the Black community in particular needs to work on their priorities in life, such as couple staying married, and fathers supporting their children. According to Macionis' "Sociology", 47% of Black households are headed by women, and a good bulk of households headed by women are below the poverty line. This occurs, because fathers do not want to take responsibility for their actions. The want to play now, but not pay later. Life is not like that. Like is a matter of cause and effect.
Even though girls have their mothers and do not need a father as much, boys need a to know how to be a man, and this is why many Black boys join gangs. As for the relationship between income and child raising, Macionis' "Sociology" also states that a Black family makes 59 cents out of every dollar a White family makes. This occurs, because as many White children have the advantage of going to private schools, many Black children can only afford to go to public schools that are inferior at best. Therefore, they do not make the grades to go to recommended colleges to obtain a good career.
Besides this, many Blacks do not want to better themselves, because they feel that they still will not be accepted in this society. This is not always true, and those who feel that this is true do not believe in
themselves. Having dark skin and/or springy hair and little money does not disqualify you from success; it just means you must work harder to obtain it. Perseverance is the key to becoming a better person.
Even though it took me a long time to accept it, everyone is equal in some respect. Every group has certain types: While there are Black families where everyone is loved, respected, and cared for by both parents such the Huxtables from "The Cosby Show," there are White families that are very dysfunctional such as the family seen in "Malcolm in the Middle." What this society needs to do is understand and respect each other's differences, as well as take pleasure in each other's similarities that we do have. This society should also realize that one must reap what one sows. Only then can this society truly move forward.