Iraqi prisoners insist: We aren't into this shit.

 I thank you kind liberator, but seriously, I must be telling you:  I don't even like S&M. I know some of you western devils get your satisfaction from a variety of ungodly practices, but here in the Middle East, we prefer to keep things strictly vanilla. Even those of us with many wives, it's always a strict rule; one at a time please, wait in line and no funny business.

 Why has nobody told me what it is I'm charged with? Being piled up naked with other men may be a natural part of male bonding in your Texan sports locker rooms, but here in Najaf, we're just not like that. Am I to be joining the Kappa Gamma Omega club after this hazing? Don't get me wrong; we are not being a bunch of up tight killjoys like Taliban, but this has gone far enough.

 What am I to expect during my incarnation? Being led about on a lead and made to beg? It may be what you western businessmen pay thousands for in a  brothel, but it really isn't my cup of tea. Thanks, but no. These kinds of favours I can do without. Perhaps some ritual humiliation; being forced to masturbate in front of your female soldier. You didn't really need to hold a gun to my countryman's head! No�wait...actually you did. 

 Blindfolded, handcuffed, what kind of sick fetish honeymoon is this my saviours are giving me? I am not a willing bride, questioned like a criminal on a charge, suspected of defending my own country? Why don't you just attach the electrodes to my genitals? Saddam used to do that. Praise Allah, he was a kinky son of bitch. Because we put up with him, now you Yankees think that we are all sadists and like this treatment, yes? And why has nobody told me what the codeword is? Black eyes and a diet of peas. It's not the guards singing "Where is the love?" which brings a tear to the eye- it�s the sodomy. Aside from forced buggery and pistol whipping, the very last thing my country needs is a twisted regime of dominatrix who think that they are knowing best.

They said me the guards have language difficulties? When is a clenched fist needing translation? Whooping shaven head soldiers on TV inspire my confidence when they cheer for freedom, liberty and the great job and future of Donald Rumsfeld. He's a survivor...I'm glad to be knowing. The guy in next cell along wasn't so lucky.

Dual standards Americans so funny, show the captured Saddam, then complain when US hostages shown on Al-Jazzier. Talk about your standards, and then CBS shows pictures of dying princess Diana in the car, just like that film "Crash". You sick bastards entertain this fetish. I've had the right to be �subject to physical and mental stress�, and suddenly showing photos of this is against the Geneva Convention. Strange. The same time they don�t believe in spirit of the convention as minimum guaranteed standard for treatment of man. It�s no so funny when the Yankee �gives head� on internet video.

The tabloid UK Mirror helps us not by showing the plight, but by �recreation� of what �might� have happened. We don�t need propaganda, we need truth. Your tabloid papers with fake bosoms on page 3, now fake golden showers on front cover. Sell new papers for money while hate breeds hate.

 Now, if it's not too much trouble, can someone please trample on my balls? I confess I've been a bad boy. No? Not even if I show you the hidden weapons? I'm joking, sir. No...please not to be torturing me.

18 soldiers in Afghanistan have been formally accused of murder.

Iraq isn't even halfway done...

Iraqi prisoner who died whilst in Coalition custody

This is from the country whose people consider themselves to be just and civilised and whose government consider themselves to have a divine right to break commandments and classify others as evil. Some countries have too many morals, some have too few. I know which I'd prefer.