Meniscus: How To Get Some

Here's The Lineup!

Incredible Facts About Dragons
Incredible Facts About Dragons $6.00 Includes Shipping
This, the most amazing coloring book of all time! It's eight and a half inches wide! It's eleven inches tall! It's forty pages long! Chock full of incredible illustrations and disturbing misinformation! Visit my gallery at the storm-artists web site if you want to see some samples.

Introduction to SBA
An Introduction to the Art of Sensory Book Assessment $1.25 what can I say?
I wasn't sure where to list this, so it's just getting stuck up here, leading the Meniscus pack. What is An Introduction to the Art of Sensory Book Assessment? Well, it's sort of like a pamphlet, with an old-timey feel, which discusses the history and application of an archaic science. The text is detailed, informative, and very well-researched, the perfect jumping-off point for anyone interested in this dying art form. The way in which this differs from other pamphlets, though, is that the whole thing is made up. As a result, Meniscus Enterprises is selling this not as a pamphlet but a shamphlet. There's probably a better word for the genre, invented by some writer too clever for his own good, but I don't know what it is so I made this one up. Anyhow, it's pretty interesting, and you'll probably think it's funny even if you fail to laugh out loud, and it's barely over a dollar so how much could it hurt to try?

Issue sixteen
Issue Sixteen: Our Sixth Farewell Issue!$2 includes shipping contains...
Just one comic. This issue of Meniscus is small, weird, all differenty and not a thousand pages of fine print. It's also cheaper. Basically, this is one 16-page comic about various stuff. The words are still kinda small, though.

Issue fifteen

Following a two year hiatus, Meniscus returns with a fifteenth issue. Features include "My Year in Pictures", which largely delineates the visual art projects that have so successfully held back my zine from completion. Movie reviews will defend Spider-Man 3, tear the still-beating heart out of Dead Clowns, and find serious problems with Superman Returns and Rob Zombie's Halloween remake. "Never Yield" once again addresses the prospect of riding a bicycle on Chicago's city streets, albeit with a new attitude and motto; and "Shit (The Great Motivator)" explains how throwing a double-handful of shit at my neighbor's door solved all my problems.

Issue fourteen
Issue Fourteen: An Entertainment With No Regard for the Consequences $3 featuring...
Another belated and unusually maudlin offering, issue fourteen begins with a variation on a classic zine theme: the rant. In this case, it is a rant about why I have stopped writing (fear not, the irony of a rant about not writing that appears in print is not lost on this writer). My favorite part of this issue is a piece called "The Dumbest Thing Ever", which details (exhaustively) my thwarted attempt to buy my boyfriend a first-season DVD set of Babylon 5 for his birthday. Of course, since I tried to buy this present from Columbia House, you can bet that nothing went according to plan. Other treats in issue fourteen are a return to the "Hobbeson & Chives" comic, with another thrilling glimpse into the adventures of this pair of crimefighting butlers. There are a handful of new "Love" comics as well, an update about my comic book store, and a funny true story called "The Mystery of the Second Banana".

Issue thirteen
Issue Thirteen: An Entertainment That Said to the Universe... $3 in which...
Continuing the trend of infrequency that began in issue twelve, the lucky thirteenth Meniscus finds its way to print many months after one would normally expect. But since I've given you two volumes of Love and a brand-new mini-comic in the interim, I feel not the least bit guilty.
This issue boasts four all-new stories: "Crackpots with Typewriters" is a long-gestating piece about the importance of the small press, originally begun in response to an article that appeared in the Washington Post over two years ago. "Ghostbusters" is a dream I had. "Insufficient Evidence" is a fun catalogue of projects I've worked on over the years that never came to fruition. And my favorite, "There Goes the Neighborhood", is a chronicle of the exciting activities that have occurred in the downstairs apartment since our new neighbors moved in.

Issue twelve
Issue Twelve: An Entertainment Up With Which We Shall Not Put. $3 and so...
The overdue twelfth issue is finally available - and the stories inside will explain what took so damn long! Not that I'm apologizing, I'm just saying.
There's one story about the final show at Mental Graffiti (it's called "Ladies and Gentlemen, the End of Poetry", which is what one of the emcees used to say at the end). Also the tale of my trip to Oregon for my brother's wedding, and a very true story about a very bad man. Rounding it out is a really funny piece of fiction from my friend billy. In case you haven't been paying attention, billy is the guy who runs The Loop Distro, and also writes the zine Proof I Exist. He does a lot of other stuff too... this guy is so busy that he makes me look lazy. And somehow, in the middle of all this, he finds the time to try his hand at fiction once in a while. Or so he says. Actually, there is a sort of creepy confessional tone to the whole thing, and billy's sort of a weird guy - I mean, he dyes his hair, and I'm pretty sure he paints his nails. He could be capable of anything, I guess. But he claims it's fiction, and I guess I have to take him at his word... and you should, too.

Issue eleven
Issue Eleven: An Entertainment With One Foot in the Grave and the Other in Its Mouth. $3 Including:
A glorious cover illustration by Mr. James Schroeder, the eccentric genius behind Donovan and the man helping me concoct the horror-spy-thriller James Bond 007 vs. Godzilla in: Tokyo Never Dies. Also, the much-more-complete story of what happened after my ex-boyfriend Aaron died in January, much of which appeared in one form or another on this web site, as the events were unfolding. There are four more "Love" comics, and a weird story about paint. But mostly there's the cheerleader story, occupying fully half of this issue. What is the cheerleader story, you ask? Well, it's quite a big ordeal, that's what, and I think the story is pretty funny but it seems to piss off a lot of people. Look, I really don't feel like getting into it now, okay? It's a comedy, and comedy is very subjective, and if I try to actually explain the story you'll just be confused, or at least misled. So just read the damn thing and tell me how you feel about it. That way everybody's happy! If you like the story, you'll be happy because you just read a story that you like. If you don't like it, you'll be happy because you have an open invitation to give me a piece of your mind. How can you resist?

Issue ten
Issue Ten: An Entertainment of Awesome Destructive Power, Brought to Life by Mankind's Hubris. $3 Has:
Terrifying true tales of Life After Employment, and all the unexpected ways in which being fired can ruin all the other aspects of your life. Then we have the tumultuous attempts to apply for a grant from the Illinois Arts Council, resulting in some unpleasant decisions. You'll also find several of the Love comics, a prologue to a comic story about crimefighting butlers, and an assortment of fiction. Some of these treasures can be found right here, in the excerpts section!

review from NewPages...review from Xerography Debt

Issue nine:
Issue Nine: An Entertainment that Swims Upstream in Circles. $3 With:
"Fusiform", a story about a fellow with writer's block who finds himself in a predicament when he has to write every story in the history of the world (this story has since been reprinted in Thought Magazine); an adventure about young jungle explorers, on of whom eats a monkey, called "Tea Party"; a feisty monologue called "Here Take My Zine" which is especially fun to perform out loud; Matt Fagan: The Movie; a fraudulent love story about Matt and Shappy that incorporates the Spanish countryside, the Czechoslovakian porn industry, and a persimmon-colored Cadillac with tailfins; some hot insider information about Ted Raimi's pants, and so much more!

Issue Eight:
Issue Eight: An Entertainment Desperately Trying to Convince Itself of Its Own Existence. $3 Including:
A lengthy and incredibly personal account of a bad breakup, involving alcohol, acrylic paint and a long overdue haircut; an exhaustive essay about the Halloween film series that understands the substandard qualities of the numerous sequels but tries admirably to defend them anyway; and a slightly fictionalized account of some bizarre occurrences at the local video store. If you are influenced by such things, you might enjoy reading a review before you make up your mind whether Meniscus is right for you.

Issue seven:
Issue Seven: War! $3 Including:
The travelogue "Me In Amsterdam", chronicling Matt and Tirza's fantastical journey to Holland, where they stayed in the red light district and indulged in everything the Dutch had to offer; four declarations of war, issued against such nemeses as Fox News Chicago and the Michigan-based zine Crimewave USA; some works of short fiction like "The Moon Story", "The Balloon Story", and "John Carpenter's Halloween"; a true story about rodents called "All My Vermin", and more!

Back Issues Available!
Issue One: An Entertainment That Does Not Fear Invisible Skin

Issue Two: An Entertainment for Immature Readers

Issue Three: An Entertainment for Certain Humans

Issue Four: An Entertainment That Kisses Right On the Mouth!

Issue Five: An Entertainment Eschewed by the Elite and the Everyman

Issue Six: An Entertainment Unlike Anything You've Ever Cared About Before
issue six is out of print - limited quantities still in stock!

Adventures in Service!
This silly little volume collects all the pre-existing Hobbeson and Chives comics, along with tons of new ones! Hobbeson and Chives, for those who are not initiated into their wondrous little world, are butlers. They're very good butlers, in fact, who keep a tidy home and always have the meals served on time. But unlike most butlers, they also have super powers and fight crime. Swamp witches, superhuman hippies, the people of Atlantis and body-hopping ghosts are just a few of the enemies that Hobbeson and Chives face in this first volume of their collected adventures! $2.75

NOTE: ALL COMICS IN THE LOVE SERIES ARE NOW ON A FIRST-COME, FIRST-SERVED BASIS. THE COMICS ARE BEING COLLECTED INTO A SINGLE VOLUME BY A COMPANY CALLED ZERO CABINET PUBLISHING, AS OF AUGUST 2007. I WILL SELL THESE SELF-PUBLISHED VERSIONS UNTIL THEY RUN OUT, AND AFTER THAT THEY ARE DONE!

Love Vol. 4
The fourth volume of Love takes a number of tangents and detours, but in the end this collection is all about where we left our heroes at the end of vol. 3, where Pokie proposed to Jack. Yes, there will be some surprises here: somebody loses a job, a secret will be revealed about a certain character's involvement in a porno movie, and you can expect at least one incident of incarceration. Jack gets a major story all his own (writing a piece of musical theater that involves both zombies and unicorns? Naturally!) while Jason and Loopy have some adventures as well. But ultimately, everything leads up to what may be the weirdest same-sex marriage ceremony you'll ever seen. Plus, there is singing. This volume is priced a bit higher (because it's twenty pages longer than the other issues!) but is worth every penny! If you've enjoyed what the boys have been up to so far, then you definitely won't want to miss out on the next incredible chapter! $4.00

Boring to the Punchline
All right, it's not really a comic, but I figured I ought to list it here anyway. During the course of Love vol. 3, Pokie writes and publishes his own zine. This is that zine. It's a story that Pokie wrote about a time eight years prior, when he ran away to New York to be a stand-up comic. Jack is the main character, though. When I printed this zine, I wrote the entire thing from Pokie's point of view, and only put his name on it (the only contact information is my gmail address, which is [email protected]). Then, I sent the zine out to reviewers from Xerography Debt who didn't know me, so they would review it as Pokie's work and not mine. Then, after Boring to the Punchline was reviewed, I had Pokie read and respond to the review in the comic pages of Love vol. 4! $2.00

Love Vol. 3
Picking up right where vol. 2 left off, this all-new collection plunges straight into business with a Thanksgiving dinner that none of our heroes will ever forget! Love volume 3 is another forty pages of non-stop excitement that will leave you breathless. Jack's secret past (so secret that even he doesn't know about it) comes back to haunt him... and what does it have to do with those unusual neighbors we met in the last issue? Pokie embarks on a brave new career as an open-mike performer, and Loopy Clitoris finally begins to realize her life-long dream of being a tattoo artist. Her first customer? Pokie, of course!
So pick up your copy of Love volume 3, and follow along as our adventurers brave another Chicago Christmas, battle untold dark forces, and prove once again that even if Love doesn't conquer all, it does make the ride a lot nicer. $3.00

Jack and Pokie's fantastic adventures continue in this collection of comics from Meniscus Enterprises! Love volume 2 contains forty pages of affection, affliction and tomfoolery which picks up right where volume 1 left off: the boys find themselves without the ability to cook or shower when their gas is shut off for nonpayment, and homeless hero Jason finds himself some new digs in the crow's nest on the roof of Jack and Pokie's apartment.
Witness the extreme lengths to which Pokie will go trying to raise money! Witness Jack's emotional breakdown over a missing punk star! Witness Pokie's confusion over the mysterious antics of new neighbors who aren't what they seem! Through it all, the boys maintain their steadfast good humor in a an ever-escalating series of plot twists, all leading up to a Thanksgiving dinner that none of them will ever forget... $3.00

Love Vol. 1
At last you can take Jack and Pokie (Chicago's most beloved young gay men) home with you! The series of "Love" comics (which has appeared in the last two issues of Meniscus) has now been collected in this handsome volume, featuring forty exciting episodes of homosexual adventure! Thirty comics that never appeared in the pages of Meniscus, ten that never even appeared on the Love web site, and one that might make Evan Dorkin bristle with artistic discomfort! This is a series that is acclaimed around the world, even in France! You better get it now, because if you don't, then you'll be completely lost when volume two comes out!
Also, Love has received some good press lately. There are two new reviews from the folks at Xerography Debt, one here and one here. And I just got a write-up in Bitch magazine, here. $3.00

Domestic Partner of Frankenstein
This sixty page comic book recounts the tale of a mad scientist (Colin Clive) who has a secret laboratory at his apartment in the fair city of Frankenstein, California. The stage is set when he builds a monster from the bodies of middle-aged, homosexual antiques appraisers and his creation escapes into the seedy gay underworld. Will the monster finally find love in the arms of a second monster? Will Colin Clive find love with the beautiful and mysterious Dr. Elsa Carradine? Romance and intrigue abound in the comic Bobby Tran Dale of Homoeroticon calls "Bitingly brilliant queer comix satire!" Don't believe me? Well, this is where he said it. And he isn't the only one. The people at Zine World said some nice things too. $3.50

Smilin' Dan, the Ice Cream Man

When Dan finally realizes his dream of becoming an ice cream man, the arrival of the Zombie Apocalypse can only spell disappointment. But leave it to Dan to find a novel way of keeping the dream alive! $1

Pumpkin-Boy

This mini-comic is the story of a gorgeous pumpkin who goes on a quest to become the scariest jack-o'-lantern in all the world, but when he finally meets the Crown Prince of Halloween he discovers that, unfortunately, he just might get what he wished for. Told in verse! $1

Pumpkin-Boy 2: The Halloween Witches

The second rhyme finds the fearsome Pumpkin-Boy sprouting out of another pumpkin patch during the next Halloween season, this time with an all-new spooky mission: he must use his terrible Halloween powers to scare a little boy to death!$1

Point of Purchase

A comic pictorial of nondescript products with peculiar slogans on their labels: Obnoxious Blueberry Flavor! Now With Green Ones! $1

Point of Purchase 2

Another comic pictorial of nondescript products with peculiar slogans on their labels: Psychosomatically Proven! Spices Make it Ethnic! $1

Point of Purchase 3

Another comic pictorial of nondescript products with peculiar slogans on their labels: Terror-Free! Softer Corporate Image! $1

Torch Song

Peculiar story starring The Blimey Guy, about a fellow just trying to relax and enjoy his life. Sadly, everywhere he goes this torch-weilding mob seems to find him... $1

I Had to Get a Stupid Root Canal

Very tiny little comic book that relates the story of Matt's root canal experience through a series of scratchboard illustrations. Brutally honest! $.50

Little Grandpa

Papa died on 21 March, 2002. He was about the greatest grandpa that ever lived. That weekend, I did this brief brush-and-ink comic as a sort of eulogy for him. Comixville calls it "a charming fable" and it definitely has one foot planted firmly in fantasy-land. But mostly it's just a little story that captures the essence of who he was to me. $.50, but I want to share it with everyone I can so if you order something else, just ask and I will send you one for free.

Meniscus Funnies

Four years of fab fishwrap! This is a brand new volume that collects all the little comics from the first nine issues of Meniscus in one big forty-page shebang. It also has several old panel cartoons from the vaults, some bizarre little doodles and marginalia, plus several all-new comics! Includes the third and final installment of "Cockalorum", only available here. $3

Amazing Porcupine Comics Presents: The Amazing Porcupine in
The Secret Origin of the Amazing Porcupine: part one

The humble beginnings of this little comic book are shrouded in irony. My last year of grad school I took a Collaborative Writing class. For the final project we were randomly divided into groups of four and instructed to collaborate on something - the means by which we chose and executed our project were entirely up to us. So, beginning with an 'exquisite corpse' exercise, we came up with four sentences, and from those sentences we developed a basic plotline for a story that became this comic. Strange, then, that for this collaborative writing project, I did all of the writing and all of the artwork. There was little time to finish, and I was busy with graduating and all, so the whole thing was quite hastily executed, but it's kind of fun and here it is. The premise is that The Amazing Porcupine is a long-standing comic book title, and this story is a sort of flashback that finally reveals the secret origin of how a postman named Ernie became the titular superhero. With his sidekick, the Delicate Ape, he must fight against the evil Dr. Scholl, a deformed villain with plans to infect the world with polio. $1

Currently, all back issues of Meniscus are still available. If you have any questions about the mysterious contents of the first six, or wish to inquire about trades, just contact Matt at [email protected] Otherwise, send your money order or well-concealed cash to:
Matt Fagan
c/o BRAINSTORM COMICS
1648 W. North Ave.
Chicago, IL 60622

Meniscus Enterprises is not for profit. Meniscus was created so my stories would have somewhere to go. All proceeds are utilized entirely for production and postage. The only possible exception would occur if many, many people suddenly purchased them all at once, and if that happened all the profit would be used to make more copies.

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