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| Jokes! |
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| If you've got any good jokes, then e-mail me with them and I'll put them up. Come on, send me some jokes, I'm getting suicidal here. |
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| What's got 90 balls and screws all the women? Bingo! What's the same about British gas and a pelican? They can both stuff their bills up their arses! A piece of string walks into a bar " A pint of bitter please." he says. "I'm sorry" said the barman, " we don't serve pieces of string." So the pice of string goes outside, tuns himself into a knot, and comes back in. The barman says " Are you a piece of string?" and the piece of string replies "No, I'm a frayed knot." Have you heard about the new viagra eye-drops? They don't do anything for your sex life, but they do make you look hard! A drunk goes into the doctor and says he feels ill. The doctor checks him over and says " I can't find anything wrong, it must be the drink." And the drunk replies " O.K then.I'll come back when you're sober." What do you call a welshman with 500 girlfriends? A shepherd! A man is in a pub, on his own, having a drink, when he hears a voice " Hi there, you look nice tonight" He looks around, no-one is there, and he starts to drink his beer again. Then he hears another voice " Hey, you you ugly piece of shit, get the fuck outta my bar!" The man looks around, and still, no-one is there. He asks the barman about it and he explains. "That's the peanuts, they're complimentary, and the cigarette machine, it's bang out of order." |
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