When Darkness Part Ten

DARREN'S POV

There have been relatively few times in the past when I could honestly say that life lost its luster and I stopped having a good time. My divorce with Colby was one of those times. Being alone and lonely in New York was another.

My new predicament was quickly coming up to top that list. The echoes of screaming fans haunted my thoughts as I hunched into the passengers seat, my body shivering from fear and not cold. As a child, though I slowly outgrew it, I had always been afraid of the dark. Much to my dismay that long forgotten little phobia was now coming back with a vengeance.

There is just something about the dark�its what you can't see that terrifies you. It paralyses you with fear, makes you paranoid, makes you panic. As a child, it made you run screaming into your mummy and daddy's room, knowing that they had the power to drive away all monsters with the magic of love and a night-light.

As an adult, I didn't have that luxury. The darkness around me was real. Eyes opened or eyes closed, it didn't matter, and I could hardly tell the difference between either anymore. There were many things that the darkness hid; I felt so vulnerable and exposed. And there wasn�t a night-light in the world strong enough to break through�

Except for Daniel, he was my light. He was the only thing in the known universe with the same magical ability to keep the evils away. His own special brand of the Force, if you will. Even as I sat there, cowering helplessly in that seat, I could hear him right next to me. I could feel his presence, warm and comforting, without even touching him. It helped more than anything else possibly could.

I don't know how long I stayed curled up fetal fashion in that seat, as my awareness of things around me dimmed. Inside my head, my consciousness was curled up in much the same manner as my body was. I didn't hear Leonie playing a heated match of phone tag between hotels, and I paid no heed to Daniel as he uncharacteristically swore in such a way that would have made a sailor proud. I only came back to myself once the van had stopped, the engine had been shut off, and Daniel had reached over to cautiously put a hand on my arm. Startled, I instinctively jerked away only to realize, belatedly, that there was nothing to fear.

Clearing my throat, I then asked in a shaky voice that seemed not my own, "What's happening?"

The thumb on Daniel's hand began rubbing in circles on my bare arm causing my knotted muscles to relax. "We're at the new hotel," he explained. "Leonie wants us to go in and get settled."

I nodded and began to slowly move my body out of its hunched position. Daniel's hand released me as I began to fumble with the seat belt, trying to get the thing unbuckled. To my right, the door opened, and I jumped in shock, heartbeat racing.

"Relax Darren," Leonie's familiar voice attempted to soothe. "Its only me�you're fine, hun."

I breathed a shaky sigh of relief then made to get out of the car. Leonie's thin fingers wrapped around my wrist to help guide me, which I really didn't need, but appreciated all the same. Some, I think, would have been resentful at the possible enabling, but I was instead gladdened at the sentiment behind the helpful gesture. Without any further ado, the three of us ambled into the new hotel.

Leonie had picked a nice place. There was no high curb in the front for me to trip over, the doors to the lobby were automatic, and the concierge at the desk was efficient and helpful. Less than ten minutes and no fans or reporters later, Daniel and I were in our new hotel room. We were both silent, me sitting with my knees drawn up to my chest on one of the beds, and I could hear Daniel pacing the room, agitated. Needless to say, neither one of us felt quite up to the "worshipping" that Daniel had promised me earlier.

With an inward, half-hearted chuckle, my hand stole up to feel the scratchy logo of my shirt. I still couldn't quite believe Daniel's twisted little form of retaliation. Ruefully, I shook my head, though the act amused me more than anything--not that I'd ever tell him so. Some things were better kept as secrets, and there was only so much abuse that my Ego could take in one day.

My thoughts then shifted to the chaos that the morning had dissolved into. I sighed heavily, absently huddling into a protective little ball. My action apparently caught Daniel's attention, because the brisk pacing paused. "Darren?"

Resting my head on my knees I replied, "Yes, Danny?"

"What's wrong love?"

Another sigh escaped. "I'm just thinking�"

He didn't need to ask what I was thinking about, that much was rather obvious. Instead, he came over to sit beside me in the bed, letting me draw comfort from his solid warmth. Without saying a word he made me feel better, just by wrapping his arms around me. I leaned back against him, and his arms drew me closer. We simply sat that way for a long while, not talking, but not needing to. That was one thing that being friends with Daniel for all these years had taught me--sometimes silences said more than words ever could.

I don't know how much time passed as we held each other; being cut off from seeing the world greatly limited my ability to judge the passage of minutes or hours, and no sun rose or sat in the darkness that plagued me. Nothing really mattered though in those moments, however long they were.

Finally I broke the silence, saying in a small voice, "I hate being scared�"

Daniel shifted behind me to place a kiss against my neck causing me to shiver slightly. "I know you do," he told me.

"Things scare me that shouldn�t."

"Why shouldn't they?"

I shifted my shoulders in a shrug. "Because it�s the press�it's fans. I've never been scared of either before!"

"You've never been blind before."

"Touché�" I sighed then shifted again. "I feel like I'm losing touch with reality. I can't tell what's what anymore."

Daniel was silent for a moment, contemplating. I could almost imagine the pensive look on his face, a look he wore frequently in the past while pondering various things. "Reality for you has changed," he said at length. "It's not the same for you as it was before and you need to adjust to it. As for the fans and the media�there is nothing wrong with being afraid of them."

I chewed my lip absently, in thought. "There isn't?"

"No," Daniel laughed then, his normal low chuckling right into my ear. "Haven't I been intimidated by both of them for years now?"

"That's true�" A small smile curved my lips.

"It'll get better," he assured me. "You've just had two unexpected and chaotic encounters this morning. Both the press and the fans are just stirred up because we've been practically in hiding for the past couple of days, since you fell from the stage at the venue. They've just gotten heated, the media and our fans, wanting answers and assurances; thing's will calm down in a few days."

"Promise?"

"I don't go making promises I know I cannot keep."

This made me laugh outright and roll my eyes. "Cheeky�"

I could hear the grin in Daniel's voice as he replied, "I know." Then his voice sobered, "Yes, Darren, it's a promise. I'm sure that things will be better in time. Unfortunately, we will have to keep a low profile until then."

"Yeah. Keep a low profile and pray our new location doesn�t leak out!"

"That too. I believe if we stay in the room and avoid leaving the hotel more than absolutely necessary, then we should be fine."

"Sounds like a plan," I stated after considering his words. Then something came to mind that brought a smirk to my lips. "And whatever could we do to keep entertained while we hide ourselves away in here?"

Daniel's answer was a low, rumbling purr followed by his mouth attacking the juncture between my neck and shoulder. My head lolled back as he sucked on my skin before he removed his lips to whisper, "Oh�I can think of a few things to occupy our time�"

"Can you?" My voice had been reduced to little more than a breathy moan.

He started nibbling at my earlobe. "Oh yeah." More nibbles. "What do you say?" Warm breath whispering past my ear. "Are you up for a little worshipping?"

Okay�so maybe I was wrong earlier when I said neither of us was in the mood�

All my words were lost as my brain and body became mush, but I think the whimper I managed completely conveyed my answer. More moans issued from my throat as his talented mouth worked its way over whatever exposed skin it could find. This was another thing I was quickly learning with Daniel--though silence could often speak louder than words, there were times where moans and whimpers spoke loudest of all� this was one of those times! And Daniel kept me moaning--loudly--well into the afternoon.

TBC