Musik

Meine Lieblingsband ist Nirvana. Mein besonderer Liebling ist Kurt Cobain. Ich weiß aber nicht ob dies wirklich an der Musik liegt, oder daran, dass er mich an jemand bestimmten erinnert. Diesen jemand nenne ich jetzt einfach Boddah. Also Kurt und Boddah hatten sehr viel gemeinsam. Die letzten 4 Jahre beider Leben waren fast identisch. Kurt war zwar verheiratet und Boddah nicht aber die letzten Minuten beider Leben waren gleich.

Musik ist etwas tolles. Da habe ich keine Vorurteile. Gebt mir ein Lied, ich höre es mir an und sage euch nachher ob es mir gefällt, oder nicht. Wenn mir ein Lied nicht gefällt, heißt das nicht, dass es ein schlechtes Lied ist. Es passt nur nicht zu mir. Musik ist so verschieden wie die Menschen.

Ein Kater, der Donald heißt

Kurt Donald Cobain

In Erinnerung an Kurt Cobain habe ich ein kurzes Video für ihn gemacht. Solltet ihr am Anfang gesehen haben. Leider ist die Qualität sehr schlecht aber für YouTube wäre es sonst zu groß gewesen. Wer möchte, ich habe es in besserer Qualität, es kann jeder haben. Weil die Schrift im Video schwer zu lesen ist, hier noch einmal. Weiß auf grau. Und für alle, die es nicht wissen: Boddah war Kurt Cobains imaginärer Freund in der Kindheit.

Kurt Donald Cobain

geboren am 20.02.1967 in Aberdeen (Washington State)
1987 gründete er die Band Nirvana
1990 griff Kurt zum ersten mal zu Heroin
1992 heiratet er Courtney
im selben Jahr erblickt Tochter Frances das Licht der Welt

Am 05.04.1994 starb Kurt in seinem Haus in Seattle. Er wurde mit einer dreifachen Überdosis Heroin und einem Schuss seiner Schrotflinte in den Kopf aufgefunden. Er hinterließ einen Abschiedsbrief mit folgenden Zeilen:

BODDAH

Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpletion who obviously would rather be an emasculated,

infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand. All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my fist introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence an the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things. For example when we're backstage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowd begins, it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddy Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love an adoration from the crowd, which is something I totally admire an envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. I must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasm I once had as a child. On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know! I have a goddess of wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what I used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And That terrifies me to the point where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self destructive, death rocker that I've become. I have it good, very good, and I' grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along and have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess. Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody, baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out then to fade away.
Peace, Love, Empathy Kurt Cobain
Frances and Courtney, I'll be at your altar.
Pleas keep going Courtney, for Frances. For her life, which will be so much happier without me.

I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!