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WHAT DID THEY FIGHT OVER?
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Who was Harry Flashman? CLICK HERE
Excerpt from Harry Flashman memoir �Flashman and the Angel of the Lord� Well, he was right, and I, in my excusable ignorance, was wrong; the storm was gathering in �59 - but what astonishes me today is that all the wiseacres who discuss its origins and inevitability, never give a thought to where it really began, back in 1776, with their idiotic Declaration of Independence. If they�d had the wit to stay in the Empire then, instead of getting drunk on humbug about �freedom� and letting a pack of firebrands (who had a fine eye to their own advantage) drag �em into pointless rebellion, there would never have been an American Civil War, and that�s as sure as any �if� can be. How so? Well, Britain abolished the slave trade in 1807, and slavery in 1833, and the South would have been bound to go along with that, grumbling, to be sure, but helpless against the will of Britain and her northern American colonies. It would all have happened quietly, no doubt with compensation, and there�d have been nothing for North and South to fight about. Q.E.D. But try telling that to a smart New Yorker, or an Arkansas chawbacon, or a pot-bellied Virginia Senator; point out that Canada and Australia managed their way to peaceful independence without any tomfool Declarations or Bunker Hills or Shilohs or Gettysburgs, and are every bit as much �the land of the free� as Kentucky or Oregon, and all you�ll get is a great harangue about �liberty and the pursuit of happiness�, damn your Limey impudence, from the first; a derisive haw-haw and a stream of tobacco juice across your boots from the second; and a deal of pious fustian about a new nation forged in blood emerging into the sunlight under Freedom�s flag, from the third. You might as well be listening to an intoxicated Frog. It�s understandable, to be sure: they have to live with their ancestors� folly and pretend that it was all for the best, and that the monstrous collection of platitudes which they call a Constitution, which is worse than useless because it can be twisted to mean anything you please by crooked lawyers and grafting politicos, is the ultimate human wisdom. Well, it ain�t, and it wasn�t worth one life, American or British, in the War of Independence, let alone the vile slaughter of the Anglo-Saxon-Norman-Celtic race in the Civil War. But perhaps you had to stand on Cemetery Ridge after Pickett�s charge to understand that. I put these thoughts to Lincoln, you know, after the war, and he sat back, cracking his knuckles and eyeing me slantendicular. �Flashman the non-Founding Father is a wondrous thought,� says he. �Come, now, do I detect a mite of imperial resentment? You know, paternal jealousy because the mutinous son didn�t turn out prodigal after all?� �You can�t get much more prodigal than Gettysburg, Mr President,� says I. �And I ain�t jealous one little bit. I just wish our ancestors had been wiser. I�d be happy to see Queen reigning in Washington, with yourself as Prime Minister of the British-American Empire.� Toady, if you like, but true. �Lord Lincoln . . . of Kaintuck�?� laughs he. �Doesn�t sound half bad. D�you suppose they�d make me a Duke? No, better not - the boys would never let me in the store at New Salem again!� He was the only American, by the way, who ever gave me a straight answer to a question I�ve asked occasionally, out of pure mischief: why was it right for the thirteen colonies to secede from the British Empire, but wrong for the Southern States to secede from the Union? �Setting aside the Constitution, of which you think so poorly - and which I�d abandon gladly in order to preserve the Union, if you�ll pardon the paradox - I�m astonished that a man of your worldly experience can even ask such a question, � says he. �What has �right� got to do with it? The Revolution of �76 succeeded, the recent rebellion did not, and there, as the darkie said when he�d et the melon, is an end of it.� And a few hours after that he was dead, the last but not the least casualty of that rotten war. Excerpt from Harry Flashman memoir �Flashman and the Angel of the Lord�Who was Harry Flashman? CLICK HERE |