RELEASE DATE: 1966
RATED: Unrated
REVIEWED BY: The DarkSider - 3/30/08
Anyhow the next day the fellow, who we find out is named Charles Spaulding, get a rather quick burial with a coffin. Apparently all you had to do back in the day is leave a corpse on the road side and someone would do the rest for you. What service indeed. A bit later, Spaulding�s will is being read to his brother Harry and his wife Valerie. Apparently Charles didn�t have a pot to piss in but they inherit a place he called home. When prompted what the cause of death was for Charles, the will reader replies with heart failure which surprises Harry.
The Spauldings travel into town via train and first run into the town lunatic named Mad Peter. When Harry goes into the bar to ask for directions, the place empties rather quickly. The barkeep Tom Bailey tells him that the townsfolk hate outsiders. By the way, if I ever went to a town that said that I�d probably leave quickly. It never seems to pan out in these movies. Bailey gives him a bit of a warning to sell the place and directions. The Spauldings make it there and the place is charming. Roses next to the door, peaceful surroundings and an inside that�s ripped apart to sh*t. The Spauldings shuck it off and clean up a bit.
Harry decides the best way of making new friends is to chastise to local barflies about ruining his cottage. Once again they all bail in a rather offended manner. Meanwhile, Valerie is cleaning up a bit and quickly comes face to face with a mysterious man named Dr. Franklin. Immediately he barges through the house looking for his daughter and complains of not trusting anyone. I would imagine his invasive attitude has something to do with everyone�s distrust of him.
On the way home, Harry is assaulted by old Mad Peter who talks a bunch of jibber jabber about Harrys brother�s death. That and he hears things that Harry can�t. Hmmm�well figuring one Looney friend is better than none at all, Harry invites him to dinner. Later that evening, Harry confronts the old codger about Charles�s death. Peter pretty much tells us what we know already. The town is evil and then proceeds to hear voices in his head again thus storming off.
Late that night, Mad Peter ends up back at the Spauldings a little worse for wear. Much like Charles in the beginning, his face is all black and he spits up. Although I would have taken this more towards normal behavior than his usual demeanor. Anyhow, he does utter Dr. Franklin�s names which prompts Harry to visit him. The curt doctor blames it on an ecliptic seizure and calls it a night. Harry proceeds to store the body in his house but it is taken by Franklin�s assistant.
So the Spauldings join up with the Franklins for a nice dinner and schmooze. Anna heads off with Valerie and pleads with her to never sell their cottage to her father. The groups rejoin and Anna starts playing away on an oriental instrument or sorts. During the performance, Franklin and his assistant get rather miffed at a certain tune she plays. Franklin proceeds to Paul Stanley the instrument and calls it a night. In retrospective I kind of act the same way when I put a quarter into a jukebox for a METAL song and end up hearing James Taylor.
Anna proceeds to go upstairs and weep it off. However, Franklin�s assistant gives her a cat which happens to belong to Valerie. Not sure why I found that funny but it was. Franklin arrives and tells Anna they�re leaving but out of nowhere his assistant speaks up. He tells him, in so many words, oh no you don�t buddy boy which prompts Franklin to stop.
The next day Bailey pays a visit to the Spauldings. Apparently he has decided to help Harry on figuring out what truly happened to his brother. Matter of fact, later that evening Harry and Bailey embark on a magical necro adventure unearthing the graves of Mad Peter and Charles. They find interesting similarities on the bodies and decide that unearthing two bodies is enough for the evening. When Harry gets home, Valerie hands him a distress note from Anna. Harry decides to storm the castle for her.
Harry pokes around for a bit and after being scared by a taxidermy snake (they get me every time too), he goes upstairs to come face to face with the film�s title creature. Franklin tries to warn him but it is too late. Harry takes a bite to the neck and stumbles home. Once home he has Valerie slice the wound on his neck which I guess drains the venom. Harry passes out for a bit and Valerie runs out to find Bailey. The two make it back to find Harry stable. Franklin arrives on his assistant�s orders to confirm the death and the ever witty Bailey tells him that Harry died. Franklin heads back to the castle to give the big thumbs up and finds a reptilian skin in Anna�s room. Then he goes downstairs and finds Anna in a nice new skin resting in the basement.
Franklin does however spout us some answers we�ve been waiting for�ok�deep breath�Franklin was investigating odd cult religions around the world when he fell upon the Snake People and he did his best to get away from them but they took Anna away and turned her into a cold blooded reptile who sheds her skin in the winter and as of this point in the movie she is hibernating because she shed her skin thus leaving it in the bedroom a few scenes earlier and now he has lost his marble for good. Gasp�ok�read that again if need be�I however am moving on.
The Reptile is classic Hammer goodness with just a slight element of cheese sprinkled on top. Although it may not be the strongest entry, it has all the elements of their classics. The spooky castle, the all black wearing antagonist in the cape, the desolate town where something is f*cked up are all elements that make this film another strong entry in the Hammer film library.
I don�t know how many times in the past where I�ve been annoyed when a plot element is stretched to capacity. However this film, even with the plot wrap up tucked into the last then minutes, I enjoyed ever minute on the edge of my seat leading up to the final answers. A great deal of this is attributed to the actor�s performances which add a wonderful Shakespearean flare to a plot filled B-movie themes.
You just don�t get films like this anymore and its sad. However, Hammer has given us more than our fill of blood, guts and monsters.
