It was still early and the dark November night would linger for a few more hours. Pacey could hardly see Joey’s face but that wasn’t important. He held her in his arms and could feel her heartbeat against his chest, her breathing on his skin and sometimes her soft hair would tickle his face.

It was the third Saturday in a row that he spent lying next to her, sleeping but most of the time just watching and feeling her. He didn’t want to miss any second with her and sleeping away those precious moments seemed to be a waste of time although he had never slept better in his whole life than with her by his side.

His life had never been better. Twenty-one days ago he had kissed her first, twenty-one days ago she had chosen him and just yesterday she had done just that again. She had rejected Paris to be with him, told him that she wanted to be where he was, that she wanted to spread her wings together with him. Together... not alone.

He wasn’t alone anymore. He was part of a ‘we’, a part of ‘Joey and Pacey’ or ‘Pacey and Joey’, he even was a part of the Potter family just like Bodie. His own family regarded him as a mere appendage, an irksome burden of the Witter clan... well, for most of them at least. Surprisingly Doug turned out to be not half as bad as he had always thought.

"Hey.", Joey’s whisper penetrated his thoughts.

"Hey.", he tightened his embrace and pressed a kiss on her forehead.

"What time is it?", Joey nuzzled her head closer in the crook of Pacey’s neck.

"Don’t know... early.", Pacey craned his neck to look at the alarm clock. "Uh.. half past five."

"Are you sick, Pacey? Because you can’t be awake at this ungodly hour... especially not on a Saturday.", Joey raised her hand to his forehead pretending to take his temperature but actually caressing his face.

"Lovesick... maybe?", Pacey grinned and captured her hand in his.

"Ohh... you got it bad, huh?", Joey placed a butterfly kiss just above his heart.

"Very bad. ... Probably terminal.", Pacey’s voice dropped one or two octaves.

"And contagious.", he could feel her smile against his skin as her free hand drew circles on his chest.

"Hhmm.", Pacey crooked his index finger under her chin and tilted her head up to him.

He brushed his lips over hers, softly nibbling on her bottom lip before his tongue begged for entrance. Joey opened her mouth to him and bit lightly down on his tongue which elicited a deep moan from Pacey. They let their tongues duel for dominance for a while but neither of them actually won or lost. It was more like dancing or giving and taking and all the time they deepened their kiss.

Pacey had one hand tangled up in her hair while the other had slipped under her shirt, exploring her warm and silky skin. Joey had wound one leg between Pacey’s legs and her hands played with the short hairs at the nape of his neck. She loved how his hair felt in her fingers, how she could feel his neck muscles all in all she loved feeling everything of him.

Pacey knew that they had to stop soon or he would lose what little control he had left. Reluctantly he pulled back a bit tracing her jaw line with his fingers.

"And why may I ask are you awake, honey?", he tickled her side.

"Because your breathing changed.", Joey stated as if this was the most obvious reason.

"My breathing changed?", Pacey asked incredulously, "So...?"

"When you’re asleep your breaths are deep and even and.... that and your heartbeat.... that... you make me feel safe and then I can sleep.", Joey explained and Pacey was sure she was blushing.

"Oh, okay... sorry, no change in my breathing then. We don’t want to have a tired Potter, do we? Especially not when Alex decides to sleep through for what... the first time ever?"

"No, we don’t. And we don’t want a tired Pacey either. But, don’t be sorry... I kinda liked waking up and kissing you.", Joey poked Pacey in his stomach.

"Me too. ... Jo? We definitely need to turn down our schmaltz level.", Pacey quipped.

"Yeah... we do. That just doesn’t fit in with my icequeen image.", Joey giggled, "Now, shut up Witter and go back to sleep before Rosemary’s baby decides to scream again.", she placed her hand over his eyes and snuggled down into her favorite sleeping position.

~*~

Jen was still deeply lost in her personal la-la-land as the highly disturbing and shrieking tone of the telephone woke her with a start. She glanced at her clock. It was only 7:30am. It was a Saturday and that could only mean one thing – bad news.

She walked falteringly to her door and listened to Grams voice from downstairs. She couldn’t make out what she was saying so she slowly started to make her way down the stairs, step by step. She knew what the call meant but she didn’t want to know.

She crouched down on the last step and leaned against the banister.

"I’ll be over shortly. Thank you for calling. ... Yes, I know. Thank you. Bye.", Grams’ voice was shaky and then Jen heard her replacing the receiver.

For several minutes there was nothing to be heard except the tick-tack of the old grandfather clock in the living room. Jen could feel the cold creeping through her. She knew she had better move soon to put some clothes on but she couldn’t make herself leave the stairs.

While she was still struggling to get up she heard muffled sobs from the kitchen. Jen hoisted herself up by grabbing the banister and slowly walked to the kitchen.

Grams stood by the window supporting herself on the sink.

"Grams...?", Jen couldn’t recognize her own voice as she softly addressed her grandmother.

Grams straightened herself, took a deep breath and slowly turned around. "Good morning, Jennifer."

Jen shook her head. "Grams... I heard you on the phone, okay? So don’t give me the crap of a good morning.", she was almost yelling. How could Grams talk like nothing had happened?

Grams nodded and sadly looked at her granddaughter. "Well, yes. Dr. Martin has just called me. ... Your grandfather ... has passed away this night. He fell asleep and just didn’t wake up anymore.", suddenly her hands flew up to her face, covering it while she started crying.

Jen quickly rushed over to her and embraced her. The tears were streaming down her face. She had known he had died right when the phone rang but now it was more than real and she felt like she couldn’t breathe anymore.

"He’s gone, Jennifer. He is gone.", Grams sobbed and hugged Jen tightly.

"I know.", Jen felt helpless. She had never seen her grandmother like this. She was supposed to be the strong, confident woman she had known all her life. But what else could be expected from her right now?

"I have to go down to the hospital.", Grams cleared her throat and took a step back.

"Oh. I... can I come with you?", Jen wiped her eyes. She wanted to say goodbye and she didn’t want Grams to go alone.

"Of course, my child, of course. ... You know, your grandfather... he loved you very much.", Grams stroked over Jen’s hair.

"I loved him, too.", Jen whispered hugging Grams again.

~*~

"Hey, Jo?", Pacey turned away from the sink to watch Joey put their breakfast dishes back in the cupboard.

"Hhmm?"

"I just wondered... do you know who’s your replacement for this France thing?"

Joey tilted her head flashing a big grin at Pacey. She had totally forgotten about that but now... it was just too good to tell it straight forward.

"As a matter of fact I actually do.", her grin grew even wider and she let her tongue peek out between her teeth.

This sight was enough for Pacey to feel the by now well known tightening in his stomach. She looked so cute and at the same time mischievous. He wanted to kiss her senseless but his curiosity was still stronger... for now.

"Mind to share your knowledge?"

"Maybe. What do you think, ... three guesses?", Joey moved closer and circled her arms around his waist while studying him expectantly.

Pacey groaned. Pulling her flush against his body he whispered in her ear, "Give me a little hint? My brain is still sleepy."

"Still? Mmhh, I thought this were its standard mode?"

"Funny, Potter. Very funny."

Joey pouted but smirked a second a later. "Okay, my replacement is ... female.", she licked her lip and cocked her head to the side.

"Good, that’s just about 50 % of the Capeside High student body.", his body reacted to Joey’s and he gave in. He kissed his way down from her earlobe to her collarbone. "I need more...", their little game was really getting interesting, in more than one way.

Joey let a small moan escape her lips before she offered him another hint. "She has a very annoying voice."

Pacey’s hands slipped beneath her sweater, caressing her bare flesh while holding her firmly against him. "Still not enough...", his voice was hoarse as he started to lick the pulse on her throat.

"God...", Joey brought her hand a little lower and hesitantly moved it over his hip to the prominent bulge in his jeans. She blushed as her fingertips grazed him softly through the material but she couldn’t help it. She wanted to feel him, she was curious and his kisses were almost melting her.

"God is your replacement?", Pacey smiled against her skin but his breath hitched when he felt her hand lightly caressing him.

"Duh. ... She goes by this nice nickname... girl from hell?", Joey continued to stroke him, encouraged by the reactions she could evoke in him.

Pacey closed his eyes reveling in the feeling of her hand on him. Sometimes he found it really hard to believe that they were together and even more difficult to believe was that Joey was indeed touching him like she was at the moment.

As the information Joey had provided slowly registered in his preoccupied mind he jerked his head up.

"What? ... Are you saying that Capeside’s bitch number one, aka Abby Morgan, is leaving us to infest France?"

"Uh-hu, the one and only."

"The masses will worship the ground your walking upon.", Pacey beamed. He was pretty sure nobody would miss her at all.

"Well, I don’t need masses...I’d be quite content with a single worshipper."

"Mmhh, I could arrange that...", Pacey buried one hand in her hair and guided her head gently towards him, kissing her hungrily.

They soon got lost in their heated make-out session and were a little disoriented as a consistent banging at the front door interrupted their moment.

~*~

Joey reluctantly broke the kiss and said almost apologetic, "I’d better get that."

"Sure.", Pacey sighs shifting uncomfortably.

Joey opened the door and before she had a chance to recognize the person standing in front of her, said person threw their arms around her all the while sobbing uncontrollably.

Joey was taken aback a little before she realized it was Jen who was crying and clinging to her.

"Jen? My God, what happened? Why are you..."

"Don’t use that word. I... I... hate God. Li..Life is a biiitch.", Jen sobbed.

After she had been to the hospital with Grams they had gone back home. Grams wanted to call the funeral home to organize everything that had to be done. She couldn’t stay there and hear her talk about coffins and gravestones and cemeteries. Grams seemed to be so distanced already. Jen wasn’t able to think about that, to accept that her Gramps was dead, gone. She didn’t know what to do and finally left the house roaming the streets and crying. She ended up at Joey’s and that made perfectly sense. If anybody would understand her feelings right now, it was Joey. She knew how it was to lose someone.

Joey closed the door and guided Jen to the couch. As soon as they sat down she tried to soothe her by rubbing small circles on her back. She didn’t say anything, just waited for Jen to tell her what had happened, although she had an idea what that was.

"My grandfather... died ... this night.", Jen mumbled leaning her head against Joey’s shoulder.

"I’m sorry, Jen.", Joey hugged her knowing that asking how she was doing was the last thing Jen needed right now.

"Uh... I’m sorry, Jen. ... Maybe I should leave you two alone?", Pacey offered unsure of what to do with himself.

Jen probably wanted to talk to Joey alone and it was hard for him to see one of his friends so upset and crying without being able to do something about it. On the other hand he didn’t want to leave Joey. Sooner or later she would reminisce about her mother’s death and then she would need someone to soothe herself. She would be crying and that was something he absolutely couldn’t stand. When she was hurting he was, too.

Joey glanced at her boyfriend sensing his uneasiness. "I think this is just the right time for some hot chocolate. Don’t you think, Jen?"

Jen sniffled and nodded.

"Okay, then I’ll make some?", Pacey asked rather rhetorically and returned to the kitchen.

"This is so unfair. Just when everything seemed to get better he had another stroke and now he’s dead.", Jen wiped her red eyes. "You know, he was much more like a father for me than my real father ever was.", she stared at Joey who sat silently next to her, waiting for her to get everything out, who let her be angry, sad and furious. Whose eyes told her that she completely understood.

"It hurts so much. Will it ever get better, Joey? Can I ever remember him without getting angry that he’s dead now?", Jen was on the verge of crying again.

Joey pressed her lips together and sighed. She raised her shoulders and her mouth slowly moved into her lopsided smile.

"Sometimes yes, sometimes no.", she paused again thinking about her mother. "Over time it will get better. As trite as it sounds, the world keeps turning, Jen. There will be days where you won’t be thinking about him and there will be others where suddenly something reminds you on him. Sometimes they memories will make you smile and laugh, sometimes they’ll make you cry and sometimes even angry. But that’s good because you’ll never forget him. Maybe sometimes you’ll ask yourself a question and then you’ll hear him answer it in your head like he would have done. ... I think that, ... that you can’t really lose someone who you love or loved because they’re ingrained deep in your heart. That’s all that matters.", Joey shrugged again.

"Thank you.", Jen hugged her tightly.

~*~

"I don’t think that this was such a good idea.", Jen sighed. She was definitely not in the mood to watch a stupid and banal old movie at the Rialto just because it was its final show.

Dawson had talked her into going by claiming nothing would be better to put her mind off of everything than watching a great American Movie. Actually he had called Joey after he had learned about her Gramps death and was looking for her. That was why all four of them were standing in line to buy tickets... with countless other Capeside residents. She wanted to be somewhere quiet, somewhere where she could try to sleep and forget for a few hours, but... no. She was there. Even Grams wanted to go for some reason she didn’t care to explain. Something that Jen couldn’t understand at all. Everything was so surreal.

"Ahh, Jen. This is the best thing you could do right now. Enjoy the last picture show on the last day of the Rialto before it’s gone forever. Who knows..."

Joey cringed at Dawson’s choice of words. Last day, gone forever... just what Jen needed to hear right now. God, he could be so oblivious. She saw Jen biting on her lip and before Dawson could make everything worse she stepped on his toes and glared at him.

"Ouch, Joey! What...", Dawson cried but Joey’s angry look silenced him at once.

Pacey grinned and Jen also flashed a small smile.

After they got their tickets and were stocked up on all the necessary movie-accompanying goods like popcorn soft drinks they settled down on their seats.

"Jack? What are our seat numbers again?", a chirpy female voice yelled right behind them.

Joey and Jen, who where sitting next to each other, looked at each other and rolled their eyes.

"14 and 15, Andie.", a pleasant voice which had to belong to the guy named Jack answered in a far more appropriate volume.

"This was such a good idea, Jack. The first day here and we go watch a movie in this wonderful old theater. I love it. It’s so much nicer than those multiplex chain-theaters.", the girl gushed as they took their seats just behind Joey and Jen.

Joey sighed audible and lay her head down on Pacey’s shoulder. Pacey planted a kiss on her temple and chuckled.

For a while the conversation died down but then the Andie girl suddenly burst out in laughter and spilled her popcorn all over Jen.

"Oh my... I’m so sorry.", she leaned over and attempted to pick some kernels off Jen’s hair.

"Okay, okay. Just keep your hands out of my hair, please.", Jen blew out some air and raised her own hands to fend of the girl.

"Oh, well. Good thing it was only popcorn, huh?", she laughed happily which caused Jen to turn around and look daggers at her.

"Is that so?"

The Andie girl tilted her head and smiled at Jen. "Yeah, I guess. ... Hi, I’m Andie McPhee and this is my brother Jack, twin brother actually... although we don’t bear much resemblance.", she offered Jen her hand.

Jen eyed her a little annoyed but eventually took her hand. By now Joey, Pacey and Dawson had also turned around and observed the scene.

Andie had shoulder length blonde hair and bright eyes. Jen turned her head a bit and looked at her brother. He had dark hair and dark eyes and seemed a little embarrassed by his sister’s behavior. When his eyes met hers she felt her heart beat a little faster.

"Hi, brother Jack.", Jen smiled.

"Uh, ... just call me Jack. Hi.", he blushed a little but smiled also.

All six made their introductions and then the lights went out.

"So, what are we watching after all?", Andie piped up but before anybody could answer her Dawson intervened.

"Look, can we save the chit chat for later? Some of us actually want to see and hear the movie, okay?"

Joey giggled and buried her head in Pacey’s chest. Dawson’s obsession with movies did have its advantages. At least he was able to shut up Andie.

~*~

After the movie was over the audience flowed back to the foyer.

"So, what do you do after a movie night here in Capeside?", Andie asked and beamed at them.

"Depends. We usually go to the Icehouse, which belongs to Joey’s family by the way.", Dawson explained. Without a movie about to start he was showing a little more interest in Andie and her brother.

"Icehouse? Ah, the restaurant at the waterfront, right?", Andie frowned trying to sort her small knowledge of the town she would call home from now on.

"Yeah, right.", Joey nodded.

"So, are you going there... now? I mean, we could hang out a little and you guys could tell us a bit about Capeside. You do go to Capeside High, don’t you? I’m so anxious to go to school on Monday. What are the teachers like and what extracurricular activities are offered?", Andie rambled.

Pacey eyed her warily. Anyone who was anxious to go to school had to be seriously ill.

"Uh, Andie. We shouldn’t be hogging them like that. We don’t know about their plans for tonight.", Jack tried to reason with his sister. After all they had just met those four. He actually liked them immediately but he didn’t want to get on their nerves.

"Yeah, well, we didn’t have planned anything but I guess today... we’ll just call it a night now. The day has been quite long.", Pacey remarked after casting a side glance at Jen who was very tired and understandably not in the mood to spend a whole evening with mere strangers.

"Maybe another time?", Joey offered. "We do go to Capeside High, 10^th grade. What about you?"

"Oh, we’re in 10^th grade, too. That is so great. Now we already know you guys. I hate going to school and not knowing anybody.", Andie chirped again.

Joey nodded and looked down. Andie was a little unnerving her.

"Nice meeting you.", Jen said but only looked at Jack. He seemed to be quite shy, but compared to Andie... who wasn’t?

"Nice meeting you, too, Jen.", Jack blushed again.

"So, we’ll see you on Monday, okay?", Pacey snaked his arm around Joey’s shoulder and motioned for them to say goodbye.

"Bye guys. See you on Monday.", Andie replied in a singsong and waved at them as they left the Rialto.

~*~

The next few days went by in a blur. Andie and Jack had joined their little group rather unceremoniously. They just hung out with them during lunch and wormed their way in. After getting to know the twins and their absolutely different characters they proved to be really nice and fun to be with. Although Andie was a little strenuous at times.

Jen was holding up amazingly well but Joey knew that this would change on the day of the funeral. This would be the day when she would have to say goodbye to her grandfather for good. When the reality of his death would sink in, when she would watch him be buried.

Jen had asked Joey and Pacey to join the funeral and of course they had accepted. She would have asked Dawson, too but she was still hurt by his harsh comments and the funeral was something so personal and intimate for her that she didn’t want him around. Seeing that the ceremony would be held on Thursday morning during school and during his beloved study hall in film class she was sure he wouldn’t care much if she invited him or not.

"So, tomorrow, huh.", Joey nudged Jen softly as they left school.

"Uh-huh. I just wish it would be over and done with already.", Jen sighed and lowered her head. She knew it wouldn’t take long to cry again.

"Yeah, I know. It’s the hardest thing. ... When my Mom...", Joey paused feeling her own tears well up, "... it was worse than the day she actually died."

~*~

"Jo, are you ready?", Pacey knocked on the bathroom door fumbling with his tie. He hated formal wear, he absolutely despised it. He wore a black suit with a white dress shirt and a black tie that he had borrowed from Doug. It was high time they left for the funeral.

"Come in.", he heard Joey’s voice and knew right away that something was wrong, very wrong with her.

Pacey opened the door and found Joey sitting on the fringe of the tub. She wore a black dress as well with a matching jacket. She looked so small and lost.

As she heard him enter the room Joey looked up and stretched her hand towards Pacey. He took her hand, entwining her fingers with his own.

"Hey.", Pacey said quietly, sitting down next to her.

Her eyes were red and fresh tears were already waiting to fall again. Pacey pulled her in a tight embrace, nuzzling his face in her hair.

"We have to go, Jo."

"I know... I just...", Joey closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around Pacey’s neck. Just being held by him made her feel better.

"I haven’t been to the cemetery since... since my Mom’s funeral.", Joey mumbled against his shoulder. "I wanted to go there, but I ... I just couldn’t. It’s so hard to imagine her lying there... It still hurts so much.", her voice quivered.

Pacey lovingly stroked her back. He had expected her to breakdown ever since Jen had told them about her grandfather’s death.

"I know, Jo. We don’t have to go, you know? Jen would understand if we don’t join them."

"She needs us, Pace.", Joey pressed her head in the crook of his neck.

"But she wouldn’t want you to be in pain. We can still meet them afterwards at their house. Just say the word, Jo."

"No. I... I want to go. It won’t be getting any better if I didn’t. I’m just scared. I wouldn’t go if you weren’t with me though.", Joey pulled back and looked into his eyes.

"As long as you’re with me I can do this."

Pacey brushed his lips over hers. "I’m with you, Potter."

~*~

During the ceremony Joey clung to Pacey’s arm and when she finally started to cry he comforted her as best as he could.

Jen and Grams supported each other crying all the time. Jen’s parents hadn’t showed up. They were on a business trip in Europe. Nobody missed them, after all her mother hadn’t visited her parents for a long time.

When the ceremony was over, Joey and Pacey were one of the first to condole. While they watched the rest of the guests offering their sympathies to Mrs. Ryan and Jen, Joey decided it was time.

"Pace?", he tugged at his hand.

"Hhmm?"

"Would you... Could you... I mean,... I want to... visit my Mom. Would you come with me?"

Pacey was surprised. He knew how hard it has been for Joey to attend the funeral and be reminded of her mother.

"Of course, but I don’t want to disturb you. You haven’t been there for almost two years, Jo..."

"I wouldn’t go without you..."

Pacey nodded and let her guide them to her mother’s grave.

Lillian Potter’s grave was situated on a small hill. In the distance you could see the ocean. It was a beautiful place.

The stone was simple. It stated only her name and the dates of her birth and death. In the upper right corner two carved hands were folded it prayer. It was simple, elegant and beautiful.

For a few minutes they stood there in silence. Joey clutched Pacey’s hand. She felt her heart constricting and the tears burning in her eyes. Suddenly the corners of her mouth bent slightly upwards.

"Hi, Mom. ... I know I haven’t been her for a long time. I wanted to come but, ... at least I’m here now, right? I miss you. ... Do you remember Pacey, Mom? I’m sure you do. I remember you always said he was special. You were right, Mom, as always. ... I just wanted to come today and tell you that... I love him and that we’re together. I guess you already know that, don’t you? But still I wanted to tell you. Do you remember when I was six years old and Bessie went out with a boy? I asked you why she would do that? You said in a few years I would know and that I just had to wait for the right boy. So, I’ve waited and who’d have ever thought that Pacey Witter would turn out to be the one I was waiting for, huh?

I’m here now and I after a long time I’m happy, Mom, I’m really happy. ... So, that’s all for now... I’ll be back, I promise."

Joey sighed but she was feeling relieved. It was good to come, it was about time.

Pacey squeezed his eyes shut as he enveloped Joey in his arms. His heart was beating so hard he feared it would leave his chest any moment now. Joey had taken him to her mother’s grave and had told her about him, that she loved him, that she was happy.

He felt like he had to burst because of all the love he was feeling for her.

~*~

"Hey, Dawson!", Andie squealed as she spotted him in the cafeteria and plopped down on the seat next to him.

"Hey, Andie.", Dawson glanced up at her breaking his eyes away from the film studies book he was reading.

"Where is everybody today? I haven’t seen Jen, Joey and Pacey all day.", Andie took a bite of her apple.

"Uh...", Dawson ran his hand through his hair. He felt somehow excluded because Jen hadn’t asked him to go to the funeral. On the other hand he was glad she hadn’t because he hated funerals.

"They won’t be around at all today. They’re attending the funeral of Jen’s grandfather.", Dawson explained.

"Ohh.", Andie’s eyes widened.

When she didn’t say anything else Dawson nodded and returned to reading his book. He didn’t perceive the change in Andie’s mood.

After she had heard the word she considerably paled. She shivered slightly and the only thing she could think about was Tim.

~*~

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