I'm sorry for the things I do, and for the things I don't
It's not that I've stopped loving you, it's just I know I won't
You've found another, just like before, to make your heart feel whole
When you should have known that I loved you with all my heart and soul
I chose you over another. You ask why I'd do such a thing
Because every time you hold me, I'm wrapped in an angel's wings
Though angels never break a heart as badly as you've broken mine
I pray for love to happen, but it's hard without a sign
A thousand tears hide behind this tired, lonely smile
I'm a different person than you see, but strong all the while
You broke my heart a million times, but I keep going back for more
I think it's time I close my heart and lock its fragile door
I'm crying now as I speak my feelings from deep inside
The pain has grown so painful now, so much that I can't hide
I cry myself to sleep each nite and through my everyday
?I knew that love was memorable, but not in this kind of way
I really do love you, but for now I'll just let this be
Will we ever have a chance together? We'll have to wait and see
It's not YOUR way anymore
You won't break me like before
You tried so hard to make me cry
I let you win
You hurt me and scarred me for life
Goodbye
The pain won't leave me
Nor will your memory
You WERE all I could see
God give me strenght
Please
I'm not your toy
I have a heart
You soulless boy
You played your part
Let me be thats all I ask
Reveal the man behind the mask
I know it's not an easy task
Not for you
Find some one else to shit on
This isn't chess
I'm not your pawn
By the time you read this
I'll be long gone
I wonder what it would be like
I wonder how it would feel
If you were to rape my mind
How could you accomplish such a task?
Would you force your thoughts upon minde?
Would I willingly drop my guard and let you in?
Into the abyss of my mind
Into unchartered territory
And once inside of me, could you excape?
Would your retreat be caused by fear?
Would I be like a poison or a drug for your body?
Could the sight of the real world traumatize your every being?
Could I kill you?
Or would you want to come back for more?
Taste the sweetness you tasted when you swallowed my insecurities
Now could you live on the edge and take a chance
Or would you rather play it safe?
Come taste my sweetness
My heart is an empty field
Vacant
Hollow
An occasional storm passes through
Thunder
Lightning
That which causes sparks in the depths of my heart
When it is done
Over
It just leaves me wet
But thirsty
And wanting more
Your love was like one of those storms
Your thunder surrounding me
And your lightning striking where I am most vulnerable
My heart
I crave more of you
I need you to quench my never ending thirst
To feel your presence inside of me
Relieve me of this pain
So much has happened to change us
But at least I can say I tried to make us work
What have you contributed to this relationship?
Pain, suffering and bullshit lies don't count
A changed me is what resulted
A new attitude
A new personality
A new face
A whole new me
It's not something I brag about either
The person I am now is the creation of your perverse mind
You are not a better person than I
Nor are you smarter than me
At one time, I cherrished the ground you walked on
But now, where you walk, the earth crumbles beneath you
Trying to rid itself of your poisons
The same poisons that once intoxicated my mind and body
Shame on you young man
Little boy
You can't break me down anymore than you already have
I am immune to your disease now
No longer will I be plagued by you and your childish fears
Thats right
I said fears
You are so insecure about yourself
You try to make people feel small to hide those insecurities
I'm on to you and your game
Scratch my name off your list of girls to break
The game is over
There is something about the way I feel that makes me want to cry
People telling me what to do and say but I can't figure out just why
No one is pushing them around telling them what to be
They can't understand where I'm coming from when I just want to be me
That is, if I can ever find that person. The one I'm looking for
Maybe when I finally do, they'll stop asking me for more
Just put yourself in my place and show me how you'd act
"I'd do this" and "I'd do that." Tell me, is that a fact?
I'm not sure how much more I can take of this "be yourself" bullshit
I'm not a jigsaw puzzle. You can't make my pieces fit
I'm happy and I'm sad. I'm angry and I'm mad
Don't tell me these emotions are just another fad
I need to know where I belong and who it is I belong to
I'm sure I don't belong to myself, but I'll never belong to you
I've tried so hard to please you
And you
And you
Look where it has gotten me
Just beyond the point of no return
But you knew that
You're the one that pushed me to this point
