Novel

CHECK OUT THIS PARTIAL NOVELIZATION FROM THE MOVIE
SHORT CIRCUIT 2!

This novelization is Dr Sky Tower's Rendition of the above Film...READ AT YOUR LEISURE!
   The overweight man, garbed in his expensive suit, struggled to keep his excitement hidden when the huge chunk of wall finally crashed to the floor inside of what definitely appeared to be a bank vault. The resounding boom of it smashing to the floor echoed jarringly in the small cramped tunnel outside.
   The young robot beside him uttered a gleeful "Percy! I'm home!" in a playful voice. But the smug, satisfied sound of his words faded when he realised what he'd just used his plasma cutter upon. His long slim arm blocked the 'doorway' he'd made, preventing Oscar from entering the vault. He squatted right forward on the lower part of his body to look in, he normally towered over six and a half feet tall when fully straightened up, and he did not like what he now recognised.
   Johnny Number Five had the awful feeling he'd done something wrong. Again. But he trusted the portly, pasty-faced man standing impatiently beside him. Wasn't Oscar his friend? Showed him respect and didn't treat him like an emotionless, unfeeling machine? The man was helping him to construct a secret hideout for Ben, so Ben wouldn't be attacked by those asshole thugs again.
   But when Johnny thought about this a little more deeply, he realised everything Oscar had told him about 'the secret hiding place for Ben' now began to sound like a complete load of crap. Why would Oscar go through the trouble of digging a forty-metre long tunnel, three storeys under the street, in the direction of the City Bank, just to build a hidden lair?
   Why would Oscar even care about Ben's welfare?
   Have I been... Johnny thought worriedly, his head slowly swiveling around to stare in growing disbelief at Oscar.
   The fat man sensed the robot's sudden unease. It felt odd, feeling such a powerful human emotion from a robot. They weren't meant to have real intelligence and feelings. Could it mean the machine was really an artificial, sentient lifeform? Was it MORE than just a robot? Oscar spared him a vaguely curious look. The machine appeared far smarter than he'd perceived. He found he had to placate him, and quickly. Before Johnny lost his nerve, figured he'd been flimflammed, and wimped out on him.
   "You did it, Johnny!" Oscar placed his hand on the young droid's shoulder and shook him briefly. He squeezed past him and stepped inside the vault. "You are an absolute genius!"
   Johnny glanced doubtfully at him. His large blue-grey eyes roved around the dark room. "But Oscar," he said. "This is bank vault. Any old Joe can see that."
   Oscar felt himself losing what little patience he had with the boy. That's all Johnny was to him. A foolish, naive, adolescent boy. "What? I OWN this vault!" he reminded him firmly. "How in hell could I steal from my own vault, Five?" Johnny shrugged his answer. "Yes, that's right. And what could be safer than a safe?"
Johnny rolled forward on his treads, over the cut-out chunk of wall and onto the floor of the bank vault. He peered closely at Oscar, using the zoom feature on his advanced eyesight. The view was enough to make him want to be physically sick. His eyeflaps drew suspiciously together at the unnatural show of excitement in the man's face.
   Then Johnny sensed instinctive warning signs in his sub-conscience. He quickly backed away.
   Oscar saw it, knew Johnny was fast on his way to bailing out. He had to stall him. If the wimp leaves now, he'll never come back. I still need him. Oscar snatched Johnny's long arm. Johnny didn't resist the tug, he allowed himself to be steered around. The fat man smiled warmly at the young robot, slung his arm across his shoulders. He did want to remain pal-sy wal-sy with him until he'd achieved his objective. Johnny seemed to respond more to friendly smiles and tones of voice. Just like a human, really.
   "Johnny..." he said chummily. "I want you to open this." He pointed a bloated finger at a locked safe. "It's full of... my old junk."
   Johnny gave him an incredulous stare. Junk, yeah right! In a bank vault! his unconvinced expression said.
   "Be a good robot pal, and open it for your friend Ben."
   For Ben he would do anything. Johnny rolled forward and extended his third arm. "Ahm... oh, alright," he sighed. But he still looked reluctant and unsure.
   The fat man felt Johnny's trust fading like a dying wind, but his greed overrode his intuitive emotions. He watched excitedly as Johnny's utility appendage slid from its covering, one of the pointed devices on the end snicking into the keyhole to unlock the safe. Johnny opened the safe and Oscar shoved the lamp into one of his hands. "Hold this," he said.
   The portly man struggled not to hyperventilate while he yanked out the locked metal box inside the safe. His heart pounded in his ears like an unfit bass drum. He wondered briefly if Johnny could hear it on his keenly-attuned auditory receivers.
   He peered up at the young robot. "Now open this," He ordered him.
   Johnny peered at Oscar's sweaty face, then down at the box. What is he so excited about? "Okay," he said, giving in.
   The lock made a tiny snicking sound, and Oscar yanked open the lid.
   A collection of jewels stared innocently up at Johnny Five's face. "Precious stones..." he uttered breathlessly. He knew what those were. "The Van Der Veer Collection..." Johnny gazed disbelievingly at Oscar. "This... is your old... JUNK??"
   "Ayup." Oscar banged the lid shut. "Excuse me." He pushed past the shocked young droid and hurried back the way he came.
   Johnny's head swiveled on the end of his neck, his eyes tracking Oscar's speedy departure. "Oscar owns the... Van Der Veer Collection?"
   An echo drifted down the tunnel he'd just dug with his bare hands. "YESSS!!!" came Oscar's irritated reply.
   Johnny spun around. "What...? OSCAR!" he shouted after the man's receding form.

   Johnny pulled himself up the stairwell, using his hands on the handrails so the going would be easier on his treads. He was in such a hurry he zoomed up the stairs faster than a man could run, and he just saw Oscar disappearing out the warehouse back door.
   Johnny felt his mechanical heart thud heavily in his lower boom, above the battery that supplied his power. He realised now he'd been lied to. Taken advantage of. Exploited. Like what that street gang Los Locos did to him, tricking him into stealing those car stereos. But this - this was far worse than stealing fifty seven car stereos. Precious jewels worth millions - and he was responsible for their disappearance!
Can't let him get away. Have to get those jewels back! Johnny's confusion was quickly replaced with anger. What have I done? I am a FOOL! A gullible, stupid robot fool!
   Johnny Five flung open the door, it crashed against the wall with so much force it came off its hinges. "Oscar!" he cried, half- panicking as he barreled outside. "This is stealing! Boosting! Ripping off!"
   Then Johnny recognised the two men waiting in the white car parked outside. It's the asshole thugs! Oh no....
   "Let's get the hell out of here!" Oscar bellowed, wrenching open the car door and throwing his unfit form inside. "That damn robot's smarter than I thought!"
   Saunders turned excitedly in his seat. "Why don't we take the robot with us? You said he was worth eleven million bucks. We could sell him to a robotics/engineering company, make them pay... say fifty million for him. They couldn't refuse..."
   "Yeah," agreed Schmendrics. "It'd be fun watching him gettin' taken apart, or made into a slave."
   "Don't be absurd!" Oscar snapped. "Bank security will discover their precious collection gone soon. We'll leave the robot behind and he can take the rap for us. Then maybe we'll steal him afterward." He said this only to placate Saunders.
   Suddenly they saw the warehouse door wham open. Johnny Five sped outside on his treads. Schmendrics watched him approaching in the rearview mirror. An evil smile spread across his face and he instantly put the car in reverse. I wanna see him hanging off the back as a boot ornament, he thought, stomping his foot on the accelerator.
   Johnny saw the vehicle reverse without warning, directly at him. "WOAH!" he cried, applying the brakes on his treads. Had he been human he wouldn't have had the reflexes to stop in time. Instead of being smashed to the ground and run down, or thrown over the roof, Johnny was skittled broadside. He went back on his treads, almost tipped over, and whirled around on one tread like a ballerina. Then he fell heavily into a pile of garbage, landing flat on his face.
   Schmendrics expected to see - and hear, the young robot being crushed to death under the chassis. Instead he saw the droid still upright - and undamaged, fall onto a pile of garbage bags. The distraction caused him to lose control. He spun out, and came to a shuddering halt in a loading bay. Saunders fell on him and they both hit the door on his side. What you get when you don't wear your seatbelts.
   "You missed him, you moron!" Oscar roared from the back seat. "A target as big as HIM, and you STILL managed to miss him! Where'd you get your licence from again?"
   "He dodged out of the way!" Schmendrics yelled back, shoving Saunders off of him. "I didn't think he'd be that damn quick!"
   "What d'you think you're doing?" Saunders demanded. "That robot is worth millions! He is a totally unique robotics system, completely self-operating with artificial intelligence no other machine on Earth possesses - "
   Schmendrics snapped. He turned and planted his fist into the back of Saunder's head. It made a satisfying THUND!
   "WILL - YOU - SHUT - THE - F*CK - UPPPP!" then he yanked Saunders forward by the front of his shirt. He snarled, "If I hear another word from you about how great you think that robot freakazoid is, I'll break your f*cking skull open!"
   Johnny Five heard their yells on his auditory sensors. He barely paid heed of it, he was still stunned, dazed, and bewildered. He forced himself up off the pile of garbage he fell into. He glanced down and saw his right tread was slightly damaged.
   Johnny put his hands to his face in a clearly frightened gesture as he backed away. He could see the tail end of the car sitting in the loading bay.
   Then the vehicle reversed noisily out.
   Johnny whirled. Terror overwhelmed him. They'll try to kill me, disassemble me, for being aid in their robbery! He saw a side alleyway and rushed into it. Must flee, escape, find refuge!
   Schmendrics jerked to a shuddering stop and saw Johnny vanishing at the far end of the alleyway. He roared into the backway and chased after the droid, eyes narrowed in murderous determination.
   Johnny saw him coming. "NO!" he cried. Then he spied a large park he knew the thugs couldn't drive through. He made for that sanctuary, unmindful of traffic screeching to noisy halts while he raced across a busy road. As long as that slowed his pursuers, he might have a chance of escape. He saw the welcome sight of dozens of humans converging in the open space. They were model airplane enthusiasts.
   Johnny sped through the group. "Help! Police!" he cried, motioning desperately at every human he passed. But all they did was gape at him in utter disbelief.
   "Where is police station?" Johnny's voice took on a hint of exasperation. He stared hopelessly from one person to the next. Why wouldn't these humans just accept him as a living being?
   The man he reached toward peered blankly at him, a confused expression on his face. "Did that thing just speak to me?" he asked, looking around at everyone except Johnny Five.
   Suddenly the young robot heard the sound of squealing brakes and slamming doors. He saw the two thugs leap over the chain link fence, weapons raised. Johnny froze and gasped. Then he turned and fled toward the church at the edge of the park square. He could outrun a human, definitely the two unfit men chasing him. He looked behind, saw Saunders pounding the pavement after him. Johnny glanced ahead and saw a tree. Then an idea came into his mind.
   Saunders came panting around the corner. He saw Schmendrics emerging from the church courtyard at the other end of the street.
   Johnny Five had mysteriously vanished.
   "Where the f*ck did he go?" Schmendrics yelled at Saunders.
   Did the robot have the ability to fly? Or did he have some kind of invisibility shield on him, like the alien monster from the movie Predator? Unless the droid was an alien equipped with extra-terrestrial technology, there was no logical way he could simply disappear. Schmendrics scratched his head in consternation. He heard a panting Oscar jog up behind him.
   Oscar expected to see his henchmen kicking Johnny's metal assbutt into aluminium siding. That would've made an excellent show to sit back with a tub of popcorn to watch. Instead he was rewarded with the sight of the two men glancing, confounded, at each other.
If they could lose their stupid heads they would! Oscar mused angrily. Why did I bother hiring these two idiots, the goddamn robot achieved what they couldn't in a fifth of the time!
   "Well?" he demanded. "Where is he?" Oscar jabbed his index finger at the pavement. "I expected to see him down HERE!"
   He didn't see something large and robotic dropping silently from the tree directly behind him. Johnny reached forward with his long arms, yanked Oscar back and hauled him bodily off the ground.
   The droid heaved the 250 pound man off his feet with ease, he may as well have weighed nothing. Oscar howled in fright while Johnny dragged him up into the tree.
   The robot boy glared angrily down at him. "You have some explaining to do, young man!" Johnny said in his most patronising tone. "Why try to disassemble Johnny Five?"
   Schmendrics and Saunders spun around at the sound of his voice. Schmendric's eyes narrowed. He raised his crowbar, threatening the young robot and Johnny made a curt motion with his head. He clutched Oscar under the arms, and tightened his grip. Oscar yelled in pain. If Johnny was provoked into tightening his hold on him any more, he would easily crush his bones.
   "You damn idiot!" Oscar screamed at Schmendrics. "You wanna trade places with me?" then he glared at Saunders, focusing his gaze on the wimpy computer tech. "Uno... ano... aehynme!" he gestured furiously.
   Saunders stared at him, expression as blank as the pavement he stood upon. "Ahm... wha...?"
   Johnny also looked befuddled. "Is your speech program scrambled, Oscar?" he asked curiously, his head canting downward.
   Oscar took a deep breath and calmly repeated himself. He tried not to say the words so obviously. Saunders still looked confused. Any moment now Johnny Five would guess what he was conveying.
   Then Saunders finally understood. His face brightened. "Oh... right," he uttered slowly, moronically. "Oh, I'm scared." He overstated himself. "Schmendrics, let's go." He shoved the handle of his fire axe against Schmendric's shoulder, pushing him back toward the church courtyard.
   "Oh... shit," Schmendrics exaggerated a cowering stance. "Yeah man, that robot's too smart for us stupid humans! He's kicked our asses. We better get the hell outa here."
   They both fled, running back through the courtyard, leaving helpless Oscar hanging out of the tree with Johnny holding him immobile. No matter how hard Oscar struggled, he couldn't get free. Johnny's grip was vicelike, unbreakable.

JOHNNY FIVE NEEDS TO LEARN QUICK THE MEANING OF "FIGHTING DIRTY"

The ringleader glared up at Johnny. The young robot gazed down at him, his anger replaced with an inquisitive expression. Johnny could never stay angry for long. He would never hold a grudge against his fellow lifeforms!
   "What language did you use, Oscar?" he asked, curious. "...Hasta la vista, baby? Parlez-vous francais? Sprechen Sie Deutsches? Ahmm... Usted habla espanol?"
   "You'll get what's coming to you, you mechanical freak," Oscar snarled.
   "Spare me the compliments, huh?" Johnny responded, flicking his head back.
   Schmendrics krept quietly up behind Johnny Five. Now he saw how Johnny suspended himself from the tree. He used a cable with a grappling magnetic cup. It was anchored around a thick tree bough, and it came from inside the red utility box on his back.
   Schmendrics raised the crowbar over his head. He stole a brief glance at Saunders, warning him with his eyes to keep his mouth shut. Then he swung the weapon down. It smashed into Johnny's back, between the red utility box and that third arm of his, and there was a resounding KRAK! An enormous shower of sparks exploded from Johnny's back, his grappling cable released him and he crashed to the pavement on his treads.
   Oscar hit the ground and pitched gracelessly forward, assing up on the asphalt.
   Johnny didn't hear the thug coming. All he felt was blinding pain. It forced a scream out of him. He fell to the pavement, released Oscar, and spun blindly around to face his attackers. But he couldn't see, he tried to back himself against the fence so he was less vulnerable to the attack he knew was coming. An overwhelming sense of fear and confusion made the young robot pause for a moment. Then he felt a hard steel object hooking into the delicate structures of his upper neck.
   Johnny suddenly found his voice. "No!" he cried. "Please stop! Am alive!" Something tore free in his neck, one of his hydraulic pistons broke. The pain was horrendous. It forced Johnny to twist his whole upper body toward that side while Schmendrics yanked him around. He tried desperately to prevent more damage to his neck by rolling on his treads toward the big man. But then Johnny lost his balance. Oh no! he thought, horrified, as he went down. Once he was down, he would be utterly helpless and would never be able to defend himself.
   Which was precisely what Schmendrics had in mind.
   Johnny hit the ground on his back. His head slammed against unforgiving concrete. He cried out again. Another shower of sparks exploded from his neck and now his upper chest, and he put his arms to his face in a defensive posture. He saw Schmendrics leering down at him, an evil grin splitting his Simian face in half. Johnny stared wide-eyed at that horrid face. Never before had any human leveled such a hideous expression on him. "Please! Stop! Do not kill me!" the boy begged. "Please no disassemble!" He held his arms protectively in front of himself. He knew it was a hopeless gesture pleading with the thug, but he had to try and convince him he was a living being.
Attack my treads... Just not my control panel...
   "Pile of shitty droid JUNK!" Schmendrics foghorned at Johnny's prone form. He brought the crowbar swinging down. It smashed mightily against the bottom part of Johnny's lower body, just below his control panel. The sound of shattering and exploding sparks was cut off by Johnny's scream of pain.
   Red blood splattered all over Saunder's white shirt.
   Saunders gasped, staring in horrified disbelief at the mess staining his shirt. OHMIGHOD! That thing BLEEDS like an organic being! He watched Johnny's bright red blood slowly pooling on the pavement, it dripped from his treads and his lower body.
   Johnny saw Saunder's expression. He twisted his flat head forward and motioned desperately at the computer tech. "...Am alive...!" he cried. "...not just... robot! Am alive... like you!"
   "Finish him!" Oscar roared at Saunders. Jesus, that man is such a damn coward! "He's a witness! He can identify us!"
   Saunders watched Schmendrics laying into Johnny, crashing his crowbar repeatedly into Johnny's body. He enjoyed himself immensely, Saunders could see the insane expression in the thug's face. So Saunders rased his axe, and brought it smashing down. Only he decided to attack the droid's lower boom.
I'll put him out of his misery. he mused grimly. This should kill him quick. It's obvious his battery is located in that part of his body. With the connections severed, his death will be quick, and hopefully painless. Saunders bit his lip while he rained one blow after another on Johnny. He felt ill. He struggled to close his ears to Johnny's plaintive cries, and Oscar's cruel words of encouragement.
   "Yeah, that's it!" Oscar's voice rang in the frigid air. "Beat him to death! Smash up his face, blind him! Saunders, what the hell are you doing? Don't hit him there, break his goddamn arms off! Make the robot bastard freakazoid die SLOW!"
   Saunders could now see Johnny Five slipping into some kind of traumatic shock. As Johnny gave in to his exhaustion, his cries became less piercing, his struggles steadily weakened. His flat head twisted backward and his arms dropped lifelessly to the ground. Johnny couldn't fight anymore, his whole world had become a red misty haze of never-ending pain. But even the pain became less.
   "He's still moving!" Oscar bellowed. "KILL HIM!"
   "He's already dying!" Saunders whirled. "I say we should just leave him here! He'll never dare bother us again."
   "If he's still alive, he can still see..." Schmendrics was still battering poor Johnny. "And feel. I want him to remember this day for the rest of his life. The remainder of what's left of his life." He grinned nastily down at the dying young robot.
   Johnny feebly lifted his head, but barely reacted when Schmendrics smashed his crowbar onto the robot's left arm, shattering it. All he uttered was a groaning cry. But then his irises widened when he saw the vicious thug step over him, weapon raised overhead. "Huh..." Johnny tried to speak, but he could hardly form words. "Nu... nuu... NO!"
   The crowbar smashed into Johnny's face. His right eye disappeared in an explosion of sparks, glass shards and pieces of his skull. He found the strength to scream horribly at that brutal blow, and his larynx finally overloaded, shorting out and rendering him mute. He suddenly sensed every one of his systems malfunction, warning alarms blaring into his consciousness. But he couldn't do anything to try and stop it. What vision he had left dimmed. He let himself drift into a dark red haze.
   No one came to his aid. Fred and Ben, Stephanie and Newton, where were they? Johnny was alone in a world that hated him, populated by vindictive, evil creatures who despised his very presence. Then he remembered something from his military past, when he was still a SAINT soldier. When he hadn't become Johnny yet.
   Flying model airplanes during the presentation...
   He raised his multi-frequency antenna, it still worked, and kinetically locked on the the radio frequencies of the model airplanes he'd passed in the park. He had to stop the thugs' vicious attack on him, his survival instincts told him. Those were his SAINT instincts. He had to survive.
   Johnny sensed two model airplanes respond instantly to his kinetic summons. Now he had total control of the little machines. The two models buzzed over the trees and buildings like angry bees, obeying the commands of their new master.
   Never had Schmendrics beaten anyone so savagely. He felt exhileration, and exhaustion. Beating the robot to death sure was hard work. The excitement of beating the machine was made more pleasurable by its screams of pain. He was so focused on bashing the life out of the robot boy he didn't understand the meaning of the new sound that now permeated the air.
   It whooshed overhead, Schmendrics just saw it pass by in his peripheral vision. He ducked, fell to his knees, and the little model airplane strafed them again.
   "What the hell...?" Oscar yelled, glancing up. "Watch out! Those things can kill you!"
   Saunders saw a second little airplane coming around the street corner. He stood frozen when it zoomed down, parted his hair and whizzed up into the sky again. Then he remembered to duck. He tripped and fell on incapacitated Johnny instead. His left hand struck Johnny's lower body, smearing blood across the young robot's control panel, and his face smacked into Johnny's chest.
   "UGH! Oh, GHOD!" he cried in disgust, struggling to get off Johnny's half-dead body. He wiped Johnny's blood down the side of his pants. It was hot, like real blood, and stung the skin of his hand.
   Schmendrics tried to swat at the little airplanes with his badly-bent crowbar. Saunders quickly lost his nerve. He got off his knees, struggled to his feet and pushed Schmendrics to the ground. "Get out of my way!" he yelled.
   Schmendrics pitched forward and fell to his knees again. "You asshole!" he blared after Saunder's fleeing form. Oscar also took lumbering flight, following Saunders back through the church courtyard.
   The model plane landed squarely in the back of Schmendric's head. Bits of his hair flew up in a little cloud. He howled in pain and clutched wildly at his sheared scalp. "You f*cking robot W@NKER!" he roared at Johnny Five's upturned, wide-eyed, unresponsive face. Blood smeared his palm. This was human. He felt more blood well down the back of his neck. Little propellars could do considerable damage to soft, clammy flesh.
   Then Schmendrics spied the appearance of the second model plane. Before he could react, it instantly went into a kamikaze dive, impacting mightily with his jeans-encased ass. The front of the model tore apart, as did the material of his jeans. That sent him staggering blindly to his feet, howling again, while he grabbed his assbutt. He ran off after his companions, clutching the shredded seat of his jeans.
   Johnny Number Five saw a dim image of them fleeing. His functions were at critical. He no longer cared. The pain had dissolved into an aching numbness, and he now felt his mind floating like a disembodied cloud above his brutally beaten body.
   When unconsciousness finally came, Johnny gratefully gave in to it.

JOHNNY FIVE SEES THE LIGHT (Part Two)

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