Hello and welcome to my web site! My name is Charles White, I live in the great city of Greensboro, North Carolina, and I am a child of incest. My parents are Mike and Gloria. This is my story. Please note that parts of this were told to me by my parents and other family members. Hopefully, they have told the truth.

In April of 1963, my mother, Gloria, was allegedly sexually assaulted by her older brother, Mike. I have heard several versions of what happened from both sides on this subject; everything from two kids ‘just fooling around’ to rape. To date, I am still not sure exactly what happened.

 

When my grandparents found out that my mom had become pregnant, they shipped her off to another city to live with her older brother until I was born. They were afraid of what their friends and neighbors would think.

I was born in January of 1964 and promptly put up for adoption. My grandparents apparently decided that this was the best way to give me a good life.. I did have one aunt who wanted to adopt me and raise me as her own, but my grandparents wouldn't hear of it.

According to what the family has told me, the doctors had said that I would, in all likelihood, be born deformed and severely retarded. They were wrong on both counts. I didn't learn until later that this would be a source of continuing nightmares for my mom. The only problem that I inherited was a degenerative eye disease called Retinitis Pigmentosa, or RP for short, which I got from my father.

I was placed into a foster home at the age of 5 days to wait for DSS to find a home for me. Fortunately, this foster home was run by a kind and loving widow, who loved all of her foster children as if they were her own. She had lost three out of her four children to muscular dystrophy, and knew how special children were. She had lost her husband to a severe heart attack in 1951. She would later adopt me and call me her son. I can never forget the love that she showed me throughout our years together. To adopt a stranger's child, knowing that child would never have perfect vision, and knowing that there was the possibility of other unknown medical problems, took someone with a lot of caring and a lot of love. I lost my adopted mom to cancer in 1978. I still miss her very much.

After my mom's death, I went to live with one of her sisters. I went from a home where I was loved and cared for, to a home where there was no love; only abuse. I was told repeatedly that since I was adopted, that I wasn't really part of the family. I had suddenly gone from being a part of the family to being little more than property. People that I had known as my aunts and uncles were now total strangers to me. Most of them I would never see again. The only exceptions to this were two aunts that lived close by. They knew how much I missed my adopted mom, and they did all they could to help me through it. I also met my best friend, Dale, during this time. Over the next few years, his family would come to see what I was going through and would do all that they could to help. I owe my aunts and Dale's family more than I could ever say. While I lived with my aunt I had to endure both physical and verbal abuse. I moved out as soon as I hit 21 and never looked back.

In late 1988, my birth mother found me. Everything seemed to go fine at first with meeting the rest of the family, but it didn't last. It would be 3 years before I would even get to go to a family dinner. I had been invited several times up to that point, but the people who were supposed to come by and pick me up (I'm legally blind and don't drive!) would conveniently forget to come. Also, my father and his brothers and nephews would go to the coast for a week in October to fish. I had been invited to go on a couple of occasions, but they would tell me that they had decided to cancel the trip for one reason or another. The week would get here and they would go anyway. I would later find out that my father didn't want me tagging along because some of his friends might go and they didn't know about me. I could go places with him, but only if he could identify me as his nephew or a "friend of the family'.

In June of 2001, I was diagnosed with an inoperable growth in my brain which turned out to be a tumor. My birth family quickly abandoned me because of lies told by my father. He had decided that since I wouldn't give him access to my medical records and didn't have (or wouldn't give) him the answers that he wanted, that I must be lying, and proceeded to convince the rest of the family of this. He had forbade me to tell anyone outside of the family that he was my father, and had told me earlier that year that he felt no parental bond toward me, so I felt that he didn't deserve to have the same rights as a parent.

To give you an idea of what some of these people are like, my sister (my father's daughter) had become pregnant in 1996. Both she and her husband had told me that when her child was born, that it would know me as its uncle. She gave birth to a great little boy who I still love and miss a great deal. I still carry his picture in my wallet. I don't have the heart to take it out. The greatest birthday present I ever received came from him on my thirty-sixth birthday. He sang 'Happy Birthday' to me. He was only three at the time. He never knew I was his uncle, nor will he because that would mean that his mother was my sister, and therefore her father must be my father as well.

My dad isn't about to stand for that being known! He works with the local courts and with the local chapter of an organization devoted to preventing drunk driving, and apparently felt that he had to keep me a family secret at all costs to protect himself and his 'reputation'. When he discovered this website, he was, to say the least, more than just a little upset! "I want no more of this garbage." I believe is how he put it. The only person in the family who never accepted the lies that he was trying to tell was my sister Tracy, my mom's middle girl, who continues to be a source of great strength, wisdom, and encouragement to me.
Tracy seems to possess an almost psychic ability when it comes to me. Whenever I'm feeling down, I can always count on her to make me laugh!

My birth mom, who lives in
Mississippi, and I haven't talked in several years. No matter how hard we try, we just seem to keep hurting each other. But the love is still there. She has never denied to anyone that I am her son. In fact, I recently saw her listing on a high school reunion website. She has three girls from her marriage. She lists 4 children on her info page (the fourth one being me!). We haven't always seen eye to eye on everything, but she doesn't deny me, and that counts for a lot. She tried to tell me years ago that this family would end up hurting me. She was right about that and many other things as well. Maybe I should have listened, but I kept hoping that things would turn out ok. I kept hoping, for example, that my father would one day be able to acknowledge that I am his son. When he told me that he felt no parental bond toward me, I knew right then and there that while he is my biological father, he will never be my dad. I can remember being in school and hearing the other kids talking about things that they either had done or were going to do with their dads. My adopted mom never remarried, so I never got the chance to spend time with a dad. Now I know that I never will.

 

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