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| L A S T I D |
| FREE LAST-AID TRAINING |
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| NOT FIRST-AID |
| WHAT IS LAST-AID? |
| LAST AID DIFFERS FROM CONVENTIONAL "FIRST-AID" IN ITS THOUGHTS ON HOW TO TREAT THE INJURED. FIRST-AID SEEKS TO EXTEND THE PAIN, SUFFERING AND WORTHLESS LIVES OF VICTIMS, WHILE LAST AID OFFERS IMMEDIATE RELIEF AND SPIN-OFF ECONOMIC BENIFITS. PERHAPS WE SHOULD EXAMINE THE PRO'S AND CON'S OF THE TWO. A BRIEF DESCRIPTION OF LAST AID TECNIQUES FOLLOWS. NO FORMAL TRAINING REQUIRED! |
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| FIRST-AID |
| LAST-AID |
| REQUIRES EXTENSIVE AND EXPENSIVE FORMAL TRAINING AND RE-QUALIFICATION |
| NO FORMAL TRAING REQUIRED! |
| REQUIRES COSTLY AND BULKY EQUIPMENT |
| USES MATERIALS AT HAND OR A CHEAP, SHARP KNIFE |
| REQUIRES EXPENSIVE AND CUMBERSOME SOCIAL AND HEALTH CARE SYSTEM WITH HOSPITALS, AMBULANCES, DOCTORS, NURSES, LAWYERS, ETC. |
| SIGNIFICANT REDUCTIONS IN SOCIAL AND HEALTH CARE COSTS, LESS LAWSUITS, LOWER INSURANCE RATES |
| -ENCOURAGES WORKERS TO "GOLD-BRICK", WASTE TIME WITH "SAFETY MEETINGS, AND TRIPS TO THE FIRST AID POST. -MANY TAKE "SICK" DAYS.. -EXTRA PAY REQUIRED FOR "FIRST-AIDER". --AS WELL WORKERS COMPENSATION BOARDS COST EMPLOYERS "PREMIUMS", AND SAFETY EQUIPMENT REQUIREMENTS |
| -WORKERS ALWAYS ATTEMPT TO LOOK HEALTHY. -GREATER PRODUCTIVITY WITH NO COMPENSATION COSTS |
| AT EMERGENCIES INVOLVING LARGE NUMBERS OF PEOPLE (PLANE CRASH, BUS ACCIDENT, ETC.) MANY MUST WAIT FOR TRAINED HELP, INCREASING SUFFERING |
| LAST-AID ENSURES A QUICK END TO PAIN |
| LAST AID SEEMS SO SIMPLE. IS THERE ANY RULES TO FOLLOW OR KNOWLEDGE REQUIRED? |
| IT'S OBVIOUS! LAST-AIDS THE WAY TO GO! |
| Q |
| A |
| A FEW SIMPLE TIPS AND INSTRUCTIONS CAN BE FOUND BY CLICKING HERE |
| (PARODY) |
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