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| LAST-AID TIPS |
| (PARODY) |
| 1- ENSURE NO DANGER TO YOURSELF -This is the same rule for first aid. Also if you are injured you may have to wait until someone else who knows Last-Aid shows up! 2- CHECK DEAD/INJURED VICTIMS DEAD VICTIMS - No further intervention required. Remove and pocket cash, jewelry, and other valubles. Credit cards and ID can be sold. LIVE VICTIMS - Approach quietly from blindside, then, quickly end suffering with blows to the head with heavy object or by utilizing your knife with deep diagonal slashes across arteries. Remember, injured persons frequently claim thier injuries are minor or, claim they are not injured. After you have applied "treatment" the victim should be treated as per "Dead Victims" in previous notes. 3- LEAVE AREA IMMEDIATLY - Quickly depart attracting no attention. You wouldn't want to interfere with body recovery and clean-up. NOTE: If there is sufficient time you might want to recover a body yourself! Please refer to my "green" page on saving animals by clicking HERE |
| Q |
| LETS SAY MY FRIEND "BILLY" CUTS HIS FINGER. HE CLAIMS HE'S ALRIGHT. SHOULD I ADMINISTER LAST-AID? |
| A |
| ONLY YOU AS A QUALIFIED "LAST-AIDER" CAN JUDGE "BILLYS" CONDITION. CONSIDER SUCH FACTORS AS; - HAS HE STILL GOT THAT 20 BUCKS? - IS HE STILL GOING WITH THAT CUTE CHICK? and - I NEVER LIKED HIM ANYWAYS |
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| WE KNOW YOU WILL MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION! |
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